Recent content by BeingRose

I don't think it's true that you're necessarily "not ready for poly". Take this as a learning experience, speak to your partner and the woman you played with that night and process what happened. Yes, the thing to do would have been to communicate in the moment, but you weren't in a place to...

This is a sticky situation. You know what you want and you are partnered with someone who isn't as clear as to what she wants. You feel that you have both perhaps been focusing too much on staying together and not as much on pursuing your individual lives. You feel you've maybe stayed too long...

So, I've always considered myself unusual in the way I saw relationships and the way I dated. For instance, even as a teenager, when I thought about the relationship I envisioned, I called my partner my 'partner' and not my husband. And the community I envisioned was suspiciously full of people...

Have you spoken to her?

I'm so sorry this is happening; it sounds incredibly painful. I would caution you against making any major decisions right now, such as moving back to your home country. Depression can really do a number on our ability to see what's really going on. My suggestion would be to find the support...

Feeling in love I'm super happy today. My partner and I have had some real struggles in our 7 or 8 months together, a lot having to do with my insecurity (this is my first 'real' poly relationship). But he keeps showing up in the relationship, and his presence and authenticity have shown me how...

For me, commitment is a way of promising to myself and my partner that I will do what it takes to make the relationship work, even when things get hard. The commitment is to sticking it out to the extent that that's healthy (obviously, the commitment would end if it became unhealthy or...

Congratulations! That's so great that you're taking this step! It sounds like you know what's important/symbolic to you, so I'd say sit down with your partner and list all the things that are important to both of you, and just brainstorm. You can't do this wrong. Also think about what the...

Yeah, the lack of communication is a red flag to me. Is it possible to actually talk to him on the phone? I've found that, though I often prefer to text because it takes up less time and feels less vulnerable, I find that talking is almost always better than texting. I've had a lot of...

Thanks everybody! Especially Sparklepop - it REALLY helped me to hear about your experience. In this situation, I don't think compartmentalization is going to work. Our community is WAY too social, and Mike and his roommates hold parties...it's not fair or healthy for there to be tension in...

Hi - This is my first post besides my intro! I've been in and around the poly community for probably a decade or so, but never really dated in a poly way until maybe a couple of years ago. I was in an LDR for a couple of years where I was the only one seeing anyone else. Now I'm in what I'd...

Hi - I'm so glad I found this forum. I was very active in another online poly group, but it got uncomfortable when I started dating a guy who had a lot of friends and lovers in the group. It started to be hard to share honestly. I've been dating in the poly manner for a couple of years (casual...