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Hi, Chandria. Firstly, a few questions: - Does your new friend and her husband understand the concept of polyamory - or is this entire notion foreign to her/them? - Does the husband realise you are attracted to him? And if so, has he indicated that the attraction is returned? You say...

^ THIS x 2 My partners are both monogamous to me, but that is their choice for the most part. That said, the one time we did all "play together" in person, I was devastated to actually SEE it happening before my eyes. Albeit, I have never been involved in the swinging scene. My reaction...

Gria, hi, I remember you from your past posts on this site. I'm not sure how old you are, but I assume you're an autonomous adult - and as such, you're within your rights to make your own decisions about WHO and HOW you wish to date. While I understand that you are close to your family...

It doesn't say anything negative about you. It's not as if you're suddenly asking her to consent to you exploring sex with others - you two MET through the swinging scene. She met and got to know you as a non-monogamous person. To some degree, her jealousy is understandable, as it's a normal...

I cannot enlighten you, I'm afraid. Both my partners live in The States - although one is European by birth. Both cook regularly. When I spent a month there last year, I got home-cooked meals the majority of the time. When we all went to stay a week in a rented cabin, we shopped for...

My boyfriend had an online relationship with a person with DID shortly before me. In fact, I am friends with her on social media now. A few of her alter personalities have their own social media accounts/presences. Jester said that even though their relationship was online/LD, he learned...

Now to answer you original question: I am the hinge in a V, in which both my partners are monogamous with me. They used to be involved with each other in a FWB capacity, but haven't been since Jester and I first got together. There did used to be some jealousy on both mine and Boho's part...

Laura, hi. I remember your previous posts here. Unfortunately, it doesn't sound like things have changed much regarding the issues between you four. While to some degree I understand your respective partners' sense of loneliness and jealousy/envy on those nights you and Bob spend together...

IMHO, there are two main types of Friends With Benefits: 1.) FWB arrangements that include little or no feelings of attachment and nothing that comes close to "romance" of any kind. These I'd more appropriately term "fuck buddies", "booty-calls" or "hook-ups". Here, the emphasis is on the...

It most certainly IS a "thing", Gemma, and I think Magdlyn did a pretty good job of explaining the various levels and motivations of cuckoldry. Yes, if it's something your husband isn't completely comfortable with (possibly for various reasons) and he has only begun to explore this aspect of...

I'm also sorry your friend treated you like that. Unfortunately, I've often encountered the phenomenon of a friend getting into a new romantic relationship and simply dropping their other (platonic) friendships because they seem to feel, or act like they believe, their boyfriend/girlfriend is...

Tinwen has some great ideas, above. As does Kevin, below. I agree with Tinwen that trust is (re)built over time, and after being tested - not necessarily with deliberate forethought or targeted "tests", but incidentally as you continue to go through life together as a couple. And Kevin's...

I think most of us understand that is exactly where Gemma's husband's fear is coming from. That, and feeling like he's "less of a man" for not being able to satisfy her completely, sexually. In other words, his feelings on the issue spring from fear of loss, insecurity and jealousy/envy...

Being borderline demisexual myself, I have never had a FWB. However, my current partners - Jester(M) and Boho(F) - used to be involved with each other before I was with either of them, and their relationship was very much the "close intimate friends with occasional sex thrown in". There was...

Wow, I'm so sorry you had to experience that. I'm sure it was absolute hell and still must be to a great extent. I don't care how smitten with NRE a person is, there is no excuse for saying such cruel, hurtful, demeaning things to a person you supposedly love. :(:mad: Seems he really lost...

The real name thing suddenly "dropped" into convo would definitely have scared me, so I don't blame you for freaking out. That said... from the way you describe his curt, almost monosyllabic initial response, followed by attempts to "bargain" ("you're not being logical" etc.), then blowing-up...

That sucks, MsEmotional. I feel for you. It's so tempting to keep a thing like that going when the person seems to be everything you need/want in many ways, and the chat is fascinating and hard to resist, but the timing or other factors preclude anything deeper transpiring. I commend you for...

Gemma, what you're telling us here requires a deeper level of discussion between yourself and your husband. His vacillating between asking you to stop with boyfriend, being "okay with it" and flat-out encouraging you to fuck your bf/mutual friend is sending mixed messages, and smacks of sexual...

Well, obviously there was a good reason you felt your relationship wasn't stable enough to handle poly - it wasn't. Cheating has nothing in common with polyamory, except that one party is behaving in a non-mono fashion (without the other's knowledge OR acceptance). This is wrong and bound to...

This could work reasonably well... IF your husband is willing to do the work to overcome his insecurities around the issue. I certainly understand his need to feel "special" in your eyes, and in your bedroom, and not always feel he is competing for your affections or to please you. In any...