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Welcome! I like to go for the humor option when presented so I’m going to channel Chandler Bing and just ask “Who hurt you?” Although I would like to ask, in seriousness, is the cuckolding a necessary part of the poly aspect of your relationship? Poly doesn’t necessarily even include sex, so...

I think you’re getting there! Personally I am a Relationship Anarchist, which is generally considered under the umbrella term of polyamory because it allows for romantic love of multiple partners (which is really all anyone can agree it means). More specifically, folks who subscribe to the RA...

Hey, Happy! I’m also in NJ along with my gf and her husband (who are throwing a poly community bbq next month, to which you and yours are welcome to attend) and have some family friends who own a farm out in the greater Sparta area. I wonder if we know any of the same folk!

I read the update, and while I sympathize with your turn for the worst, I want to emphasize this again. I recently realized I have a habit of triggering therapists/counselors who presume I don’t know what I’m talking about. Not every therapist is good or worth talking to. I don’t talk to my...

Mr. Vox has excellent self esteem.

I don't disagree that all of my conclusions are based on very black and white interpretations that only feature one side of the story. Every opinion I have should of course be taken with as much salt as desired. Strong opinions, loosely held. I welcome all information that allows me to update my...

Fair enough! To me, the silent treatment is an unwillingness to engage and a period of “freezing out” wherein the offending party is basically avoided. When I require space, I say clearly how much time/space I think I will need and what I need from the other person in order to feel that I am...

The silent treatment is always a red flag.

Or it’s baloney :p I think astrology appeals to the human brain’s inherent need to find patterns in everything. It’s useful shorthand for referring to certain archetypal personality types, but just like with every other taxonomical categorization system, breaks down when trying to define an...

Only a few months into really living the reality after a lifetime of uncomfortable monogamy, but so far it’s been a dream come true. I met my gf on the app Feeld. She and her husband live the next town over and the three of us spend most evenings of the week together at their house, just...

Heheh this is best enjoyed with a cup of coffee or *tea.* I think what Evie so elegantly and precisely pointed out is that Teneb was counting how many times he saw people expressing interested in FMF arrangements rather than stories of actually being in one; meanwhile in reality, MFM combos...

Im already out. Why the supernormative, heterosexual, patriarchical dynamic/structure? If that’s what you’ve landed on, I challenge your claim to have thought deeply on this. What is the basis for the model? There is plenty of archaeological and evolutionary biology evidence to suggest that...

Ooo, what a Smelly Nelly *wink* No, umm… Stinks Minx. Snot Hot. Snoot Cute. FART TART?!

If actions and words aren't aligning, ignore the words because people don’t act against their actual motivations. People can say they believe something or want to know more or whatever they want, but if nothing ever changes, stop listening. Sometimes people will say things just to get what they...

I’m keeping Feeld open specifically to “let things happen,” but *my* experience on the app involves huge periods of zero activity and therefore very little effort. I don’t know what it must be like for folk who need to actively weed through terrible people to find the good folk. Sounds exhausting.

I don’t think I disagree with anything you said, Mags. It’s a pretty near-and-dear topic myself and -… I had to rewrite this next bit a few times cuz my pulse kept rising and I realized that my experience may not be particularly common and I may have just straight up been projecting a bit. My...

Of course it is, Evie. I gotta cook longer.

I appreciate the humility, but let’s be fair, being a straight guy who can maintain a healthy relationship with ONE woman, let alone multiple, is remarkable in and of itself. You’re obviously bringing something to the table besides luck. I suspect emotional maturity.

I didn’t revive this thread, no one can blame me for being here now! - All relationships are interpersonal, so all interpersonal skills will translate into your relationships. If you struggle with your current relationship, adding another will never improve the situation. - Go to therapy. It’s...

lol I’m glad I’m not the only one, and I actually knew the terms! just not the abbreviations. Yeh, hi! I don’t think we’re the droids you’re looking for, but feel free to look around. Maybe we’re actually exactly who you’re looking for *you just don’t know it yet*