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GG Why yes, yes he does. He loves conflict in a relationship. It's a rush (maybe adrenaline) for him. Which is why he still has a relationship with Polo. That's a relationship from which I stay away. DAG tells me several times a week that he wants to be around me 24/7 (I assume that's...

Mags, I am the one in the relationship who has low self esteem. In my opinion, DAG is OK with himself, although he's had some cosmetic surgery to correct some issues with his weight loss. I love him, no matter what he looks like, but he wasn't happy with the way he looked. I am getting better...

GG That situation is what caused me to re-think my view on my relationship with DAG and to change my approach in how I interact with him on certain issues. The statement he made about me being 'cold' was within the last couple of weeks. He also made the statement about me using 'cold' logic (I...

GG, I am fairly easy going. Just don't be the back seat driver and don't bring your outside relationship drama to me, we should be fine. It is interesting that he never really brought his Polo drama to me, but damn if he didn't try to bring his Bruiser drama to me. Kevin, You pretty much...

LOL In certain situations, yes. I try to treat him like an adult. If he makes mistakes and then wants my sympathy for the outcome of certain things (your umbrella example), sure, I'll lend a sympathetic ear. For relationship issues with one of his friends+, too damn bad. Per one of my...

GG, As always, very insightful and helpful. Thank you for taking time to respond! You bring to light some things I need to think about and develop additional boundaries and make my current boundaries stronger. I still have a lot of work to do. With that: because that's when *I* feel cold...

For instance, (Mags is going to get on to me about this :)) I apologized to one of of my metas, in an attempt to smooth things over, so they would feel comfortable in coming to our house to visit DAG. I had a conversation about that with DAG and basically told him I would never do that again, as...

I've attempted to initiate sex with my spouse, DAG. Yesterday, he told me he'd like to have sex with me, but sometimes I use 'cold' logic (is there any other kind?) when discussing relationship issues with him, which makes him feel I put some distance between us. I feel I need to put logic in...

How sad is it that I wish this was my life. I wish for a life in a post-apocolyptic America (in a video game, to boot), instead of my life in the real world. I've come to the realization that I am not happy in my relationship with DAG. All we are doing is decorating a house. All he wants to...

@Rooster I hope it works out. I'm sending you good vibes regarding the breakup with Jem. Keep us posted, please!

Covid is a bitch. I know, Master of the Obvious. It really didn't hit home until last night and today about how much a bitch it is, really! As I stated in an earlier post, I had lunch with Broadway yesterday. We spent around 2 1/2 hours catching up with each other. He's in town with a...

@icesong I had been wrestling with this off and on for a few months after DAG's breakup with Bruiser and FC. Because I wanted nothing to do with his relationships with those two, I didn't make myself available to DAG for him to process the breakup. There were times I thought I was being...

I'll not hijack this thread to make it about me, so I will post this on my blog. icesong brings up something that I have been wrestling with for some time. Look for it over there. Rooster, your weekend sounds like it was tough, and I feel for you. I've been in KC's shoes where I just shut...

Back seat driving. I absolutely hate it. DAG is never comfortable with my driving skills. He's usually physically reacting to anything I do which he sees as potentially causing an accident and harming us. I know I am not that great of a driver, but I am as cautious as I can be, given my...

I will open up and say this: if you ever want to vent, ask questions, or just shoot the shit, contact me. I think you've seen my blog on this site, so you can post there too.

Rooster, I read through your posts, and there a lot of similarities between your situation and what I went through with DAG. Even similar views on sex. I can do one night stands, but DAG needs an emotional connection to someone before he can have sex. Also, I went through a long period of...

Out of all the BS I went through during our initial exploration of poly, this was the best thing to come out of it. I had alone time and could do things on my own without pushback from DAG. My one rule on this was that I was not doing chores around the house if DAG was out having fun with his...

And it's my birthday? Touchdown!! ;-)

First, I learned something new today. Disentanglement. I won't get into it here, but after reading the article the OP provided, it explains a few things in DAG's relationship to me. Second, be honest with yourself. Don't try to submerge any feelings you may have about a relationship or how...

BBB, I hear you on the lack of dating opportunities. When DAG and I were practicing poly, he could get anyone he wanted. But for me, I couldn't even get an ex to date me, as he, in his words, stated "I'm tiptoeing around your marriage". I also have relatively low self esteem (who wants to...