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Just like friends and family. I like some of my spouse's friends. I don't like others. I like some of his relatives and I don't like other relatives. Shoot, I like some of my own relatives and dislike others! I am basic polite to these people, but I don't have to be super tight or best...

You guys are awesome! GG: Thank you for the link to the explainer. It helped in some ways, namely that I have the freedom to call it as I see it. As I see it, I gave DAG consent to pursue a poly relationship, even if I did not approve of the one he was dating. So to me, I was still in a...

In your opinion, would I still be in a poly relationship, even if I did not approve of his relationship with others? In other words, be in denial/rejection of said relationships?

Never mind, I have my answer. I was not in a poly relationship (not even by extension). I can't delete the original post, but wanted all who read this that I have my answer, so no need to respond. Thanks!

I did some research on a few sites regarding the definition of poly. I did not see any information which answered my question, so I want to put this to the members of this board. DAG and I are having a discussion about who is involved in a poly relationship. As a direct example, I am not...

And I really appreciate the feedback! Everyone who has posted on my threads has been full of good advice and guidance. Hopefully, this will be like learning out to ride a bike. Once I get through the practice phase, I'll be able to navigate better. Although life is constant practice. You...

Thanks Mags! I've read part of this and plan to finish before the weekend. I realize this is a short read, but still. Anyway, the first three items are the ones I need to work on the most. I have 'forgiven' DAG. Not that he really needs forgiving, but it helps (if that makes any sense). I...

He seems to be cool with it now, as he sees that my outward approach to him has not changed. I just have him in a different state emotionally and mentally than I had him when we got married.

GG, Yes, he did assume a lot. For instance, B and F invited DAG over for Thanksgiving last year, with an extended invite to me. DAG accepted without even talking about it with me. When I said I didn't want to go, he was visibly upset. He wanted us to go as a couple, because to him, couples...

Icesong, Here's the thing. I sent the apology over 4 months ago, when Bruiser and DAG were still good friends, so I still had some expectation that I would get a 'Thanks for sending' response from Bruiser. Two weeks ago, they ended communications with each other. There was plenty of time for...

GG, there are a couple of things I missed in your extended post above It has been very chaotic, and I try to find stuff I like to do to calm myself. Cooking and yard work have been my therapy. Video games have helped as well, although I try not to rely on that, as I can get addicted to...

Exactly. It bothers me, because I am used to getting closure from the other side of an issue. I'm confused about why he is ignoring the apology. What's so hard about saying 'I received it, thanks for sending it'? I would take that as closure. He doesn't even have to accept, or reject, the...

SPA and GG, you both hit on it pretty much. While we may not have some things in common regarding the direction of our relationship, I don't want to leave him because he has all of the basic pluses to me. He is a stable person. Has a job, very smart, not egotistical or overly narcissistic...

Ballistic means that he was visibly upset at my boundary. His voice got loud, but no yelling and no physical violence, or threats. He didn't understand why I would even consider putting in place a boundary for myself based on something which may, or may not, happen. He said he's told his...

Thanks for the clarification. I am not sure if I embrace his desires joyfully, but I don't do it begrudgingly. At least not anymore. I think the joyful part will take some time to develop. I think I am in the 'OK, if that's what he wants, I'm fine with that' phase. So maybe I'm not feeling...

I am detaching with love. I still love him, and subscribe to the idea that love is unlimited. Yes, it depends on where in the spectrum you place someone you love (brother, sister, mother-in-law, S/O, fuck buddy), but yes, my love for him is still there.

Evie: This has been the hardest part. I am still working to think about him as not being my husband, but a very close friend. To me, the concept of 'husband' includes the usual baggage of 'ownership'. De-escalation was my original pitch to him, and he went ballistic. An aside, your reference...

Mags, it helps some. Is that a temporary detachment, or more permanent? Sorry if what I asked got muddled in my explanation, but I want to know if what I consider to be detachment is actually a shift in perspective about our relationship, or if those are two separate activities? Your...

I need some assistance with how I am feeling regarding my relationship with DAG. Some background for those who haven't read my rolling blog on this site. My spouse DAG has taken up the mantra of 'I'll do what I want'. Which means EVERYTHING is on the table. Romantic relationships, sex, kink...

DAG and I had an overnight guest last night. He arrived yesterday afternoon and we briefly caught up with each other. The guest knows about our relationship situation, and asked DAG about the status of his relationships with Bruiser and Fisticuffs. DAG stated those relationships are on the...