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There's a distinction between being poly and being in a poly relationship. It's not so surprising, just because you're monogamous wired doesn't mean you know how to be in a relationship. What's weird is that it never occurs to mono people that there's anything wrong with there being tons of...

1. We have two children so we like to make sure that anyone we date can be friends with everyone. That way we can all do stuff together and it not be awkward. Yep, my partner and I are the same. Now, he is protective of his kids, so we don't bring new people around them. But we insinuate...

Having kids is the biggest commitment you can make, so I'm confused how you can think two people would want to have kids, yet not want commitment. Kids are a bigger commitment than marriage or anything else you could possibly do. However, if you know people who want kids, yet are the kind of...

"--she (or I) can fall in love with someone else" Why is that a negative? That is, after all, the heart of poly.

I think this is the best part of poly! Or one of. The fact that, yes, I might not get every night with my guy, but then the first 10 day span? I hardly knew what to do with it, it felt like such an excess of time with him. And you SO appreciate it, in a way mono people will never know. Of...

If you are simply non-monogamous and not poly, than closing your relationship might be possible-- if you can get her to agree to it. But if she's poly and in a committed, emotional relationship with others, it's not right for you to ask her to cut them out of her life. Even if she agreed, it's...

Granted, my tolerance for drama is higher than most. Still, while she has a significant amount of drama in HER relationships; and you and your SO have drama in YOURS over HER issues; it doesn't appear that she and he have much drama themselves. I know you dislike the thought of getting...

I think if she really wants to be seen as a "friend," it's best for you to be there. Otherwise, it'll be super weird, especially for in-laws who won't know what to make of it. On another note, why do mono women insist on dating within poly structures? My poly partner had ONE mono "toy," he...

Like many on here, I'm going to restrict my answer to those IN my poly family (and not tangentially related, i.e. dating partners I'm involved with). So, there's myself, my partner, and, potentially, two new girlfriends (at the moment, however, my partner defines the poly group as just him and...

I take my D/s role extremely seriously, but I'm not much into the "lifestyle." Nonetheless, I started reaching out about a year ago in order to expand to a new, non-judging community. Or, at least one where I could freely introduce my married partner (they were more weirded out when they found...

It sucks, but you always have to remember losing, in this case a 20+year relationship, is always harder for them. It's just weirder for you (no frame of reference.) Reach out to me if you want to discuss further.

Hold on, cowboy. You've only mentioned the relationship developing between your wife and his husband. Totally does NOT obligate the wife to be romantically involved with you, and also it's usually a bad idea to force a quad. Should you and the wife later develop feelings, or you for another...

It's always the couples that talk about how "perfect" they are, that end up falling apart, no? I can only tell you I'm going through something similar. Fortunately, due to the particular dysfunction of the wife and the particular skills of the husband, I'm in much better shape than you with...

My partner only goes on dates alone when I'm not around. Still, I mean, you and he go do stuff on your own, right? What's the difference if he's going on a date, or a night with the guys?

If you don't believe that you should be happy, you never will be. Only you can make yourself happy.

You can. But it's your choice. Just know that it doesn't matter if you're crazy or not, as long as you're happy.

I could not compromise myself like that. It depends on you, though. Is remaining in this relationship worth that?

Social conditioning is incredibly hard to get over. The fact that he can allow himself to look, without feeling guilt, is a very good sign. I wouldn't push him, just naturally allow him to feel what he does.

I wouldn't take this as her deliberately trying to hurt you. If this other woman is not making her choose, your partner may simply be craving a person who is fully accepting of her poly nature. She may need that while she is lost and confused. Another friend may judge her choices.

And did you like this, or did you have other expectations? That seems like a secondary style relationship, and I don't have a lot of experience with that (I see my one partner every 2-3 MONTHS, but I have daily contact and video Skype at least a couple times a week).