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Well, the jury is out on physical compatibility, but this guy plays a long game... The women in his life are all long distance and long term. He shared just the right amount, I think. He directly asked me about my 2 dynamics. I didn't dive deep. He's polyamorous to the core, so not going to...

Thank you all for your feedback. There's no way I want to hide anything at all. We met through Feeld and my profile there is pretty clear and upfront. I'm looking forward to asking him more about why polyamory is right for him, where everyone fits. He knows I'm really time-poor until February...

I've had a quite drawn out getting to know you period with a polyamorous guy (let's call him the Fireman because he is one) who seems really sweet and into me (but we've not gotten intimate, so that's probably to be expected, says my inner cynic). We had set up 2 dates that were supposed to...

I've started seeing a therapist who in many ways is very open-minded and I've felt the couple of sessions we've had have been really positive. However today he said words to the effect of 'studies show most polyamorous people have an anxious avoidant attachment style'... Now I am very secure...

Not sure if it counts but a few weeks ago I walked away from a high speed high impact car crash. The word miracle has been bandied about by the medical teams and everyone who knows about cars.

I think he's wanting me to pick from the swingers pool. He means well but his crush that started polyamory as being a discussion point for us was not a swinger so I do think he'll start to understand the ethics but not while he's still emotionally charged and we haven't fully repaired. We're...

Hey thanks all - I thought I'd leave it a while before posting - I decided to sit out reaching out to him, it's been 4 weeks. I guess I did bring up no contact in our last conversation - so maybe it's just a given that's what is going on. I do intend to call or message but in a few days or the...

A long read... As laid out in my posting history I have a long-term nesting partner and HAD a boyfriend (the Surfer) of a couple of years who just got his cancer removed. For those familiar with my journey, he had prostate surgery about 3 weeks ago, and while I knew we were winding our sexual...

Time for another update. As far as we know the cancer hasn't spread so the Surfer's going in for surgery pretty much a month from today. It will basically be an off switch for our sex life, hopefully just for a few months but it can take years for some men to recover from the ED and neither of...

My long-term partner and I transitioned from monogamy into sexually open relationships 17 years in, and then 10 years after that into polyamory. Looking back I can see how naive we were thinking that connecting with other people would play out exactly as we saw it in our heads. And in time...

Update - she reached out asking if everything was OK. I wrote back saying words to the effect of I didn't feel like she heard me, that I lacked capacity to try and push through and that I felt she was giving no space or respect to the friendship my NP, the Surfer and I had built in the years...

He's just not ready to tell his family until he knows how bad the cancer is. 2 of his 3 kids don't want a relationship with their mother (not the ex I talk about), his folks are old and have their own health issues and I kinda get it. There was a guy in his 40s at the hospital who was there...

I joined him for the bone biopsy a couple of days ago, neither of us thought they'd let me stay so I was just going to drop him there, pick him up again but instead it was a big long day spent talking and having a really sweet time despite the circumstances. Our relationship has been very...

Thank you, that is really helpful. I'm guilty of complaining about her a few times today to my Nesting Partner but she's left me alone and hopefully tomorrow the need to go over it will lighten and I'll be closer to actually letting go not just saying I will. In our usual style (after she...

My first post covered a little bit of a complicated situation which I guess in many ways lead me to polyamory. Sorry if this is a long one. Short version - when I first met my Boyfriend - the Surfer, he was 1 half of a swinging couple that my Nesting Partner and I grew close to, they broke up...

I found a lot of peace through deciding to immediately question anything that felt wrong (in my head). Before realising this was an option I felt attacked. Not that she was actually trying to attack me, as she didn't understand I saw the whole picture. She was trying to control the construct of...

Interesting timing with this post. Over the years I and my NP have been expected to pick sides when mono couples we knew split. Often each individual's faults would be grossly exaggerated, we soon learned to try to step back and stay clear. We first met my boyfriend (the Surfer) while he was...

Thanks so much for your replies. We spent a whole nearly 6 hours together yesterday and covered a lot of ground. A big focus from both of us on working to make sure we retain the friendship. But what really became clear is cancer, his avoidant nature and the desire for a nesting partner aside...

So as some may remember I've had a bit of a roller-coaster ride after dipping my toe into polyamory. Spent the better part of the 1st year of being in a formalised relationship with my boyfriend (the Surfer) running hot and cold - a traditional guy obviously challenged by polyamory but enjoying...

My original thought was Acting on any of this is a bad idea