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OK. So my original post was as much about me trying to sort this out in my head as anything. Those that have offered opinions, cheers for that. I'll be sitting down with SO and having a good long chat. My issue isn't that they are spending time together, so no, this isn't some jealous snit here...

This actually made me laugh. Because at first, she literally wanted us all to live in a giant house, and for us to spend most of our time together as a tri. I was like "well, I do actually want my own relationship with SO as well."

kdt26417, a part of me did have that bitchy thought, but no. I'm not going to do that sort of thing. As I said in my response above, I'm not saying she shouldn't ask him or that he can't go. This isn't about permission, or me deciding what my SO is doing, or such. Honestly? My ideal would be to...

PinkPig, interested for your input here, as you seem to contradict other stuff I've seen relating to meta relationships and are more in line with M's stand here by the looks. My thoughts: Surely all people involved in a poly situation have at least some responsibility to act with the overall...

Ok. Please bear with me. I'm writing this as much to try to understand what is happening here, as I am to get input on this situation. Background: I'm in an N relationship structure, where I'm one of the tails. I am involved with my SO, who is involved with another woman (M), who is also...

I've been looking for resources on narcissism and poly relationships. What I find focuses on the immediate relationship: if you are currently with someone who has narcissistic tendencies. What I'm interested in, though, is the experience of being in a situation where your meta is the one who is...

I hadn't thought of that sort of option. Thanks There's a few, mostly involving knocks to the head being drunk as a teenager. But he remembers an incident with him cracking his head on a rock slab, when he was a kid. That left him bleeding and dazzed. And another that he doesn't remember the...

I would like to see it. In truth, he is a lot better to me than I've experienced previously, and seen exampled in earlier life. I know that doesn't sound good, but actually that is important. As I wrote that list down, I started asking myself why I'm with him, because in bullet form like that...

Ok, here goes LOL Lol ya think? That's why I came here We have been officially together a year and a half. We have known each other 7. He asked both of us out on the same day. Technically, he is supposed to be splitting his living space between my place, her place, and another place. In...

yeah, you're right. Sometimes I don't know how these things are going to affect me, so I opt for the less confrontational path, especially when I can see that it wasn't intentional dickishness on their part. At other times though, I'm blindsided - and I'm left asking WTF just happened. These...

Trust me, I did say something at the time about it being uncool. And now we have a lot more open communication (says she as she's looking at the three month planner on her wall...) But yes, it was one of the problems we've had to work through... But I looked at the timetable, and didn't actually...

See, I'm actually not the one determining how much time they spend together. We have a weekly timetable that was mostly determined by them. I kinda just got told about it after it was drawn up. I pointed out at the time that it would have been cool to actually have been part of that drawing up...

We are in our thirties. It is his first experience with poly, but not mine or his other gf. Technically, there isn't a hierarchy, though he does spend a lot more time with me. She is in another relationship too. So I guess more realistically, it's an N, with me one of the tails, and her other SO...

I have used humour a number of times, and sometimes it works. At other times I'm lucky if a get a peck on the lips, and then it's a bit "Well if I have to" feeling. I haven't asked about rules. But then I'd be surprised if there was anything like that. His other gf and I get on well, and it...

I try to do that, but even then he'll move to kiss my forehead.

Hi. So this may seem odd, but I'm not sure how to process this. I'm in a V, with my SO being the hinge. We are close, but to be honest, our relationship has been rather rocky in the past. Rockier than the other relationship he's in. So I'll admit right out front that I'm over sensitive these...