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  1. M

    Is it ethical to fantasise about people besides my mono partner?

    Thanks all for the replies and for feeding back with your stories. I guess the situation trips me up because I would feel a little guilty if I fantasised about someone else. Especially as there are some people who I would want to fantasise about whom it would be really hurtful for my partner if...
  2. M

    Possibly poly (partner's definitely mono.) Or am I just horny?

    I really hope I can. Currently going through CBT to try and work through this and figure out a way. I just don't want this relationship to end. Equally, I'm scared for the future, and I can't see it because I know that the unhappiness will keep cropping up unless I either nix this desire or feel...
  3. M

    Possibly poly (partner's definitely mono.) Or am I just horny?

    Hi Mags, Thanks for sharing your story. I looked up the book Sex at Dawn - it seems like an interesting idea, although it also seems to have attracted a lot of criticism from scholars. In any case, I'm wary of any broad conclusions about whether the human race as a whole are inclined to being...
  4. M

    Possibly poly (partner's definitely mono.) Or am I just horny?

    Hi 3908. It's an interesting idea. I'm fairly sure that this is something my partner would not be on board with - especially given that the Covid risk now is not going away any time soon. To be fair, until the pandemic completely disappears, I would have the same reaction if she was considering...
  5. M

    Possibly poly (partner's definitely mono.) Or am I just horny?

    Hi GalaGirl, thanks for the detailed response. Well, it's not so much that I'm being super restrictive with myself, but that as a result of how I hurt her when I was messing around, I know for sure that she would never be willing to open up. We've talked about it a lot, because she knows that I...
  6. M

    Is it ethical to fantasise about people besides my mono partner?

    I'm (possibly) poly, and my partner is mono. We attempted an OR when we first started going out, but I hurt her a lot in the process. Eventually I decided to be with her practising mono, and not seeing other people. I still feel a sadness about not being able to have other experiences. I don't...
  7. M

    Possibly poly (partner's definitely mono.) Or am I just horny?

    My current partner and I have been together for over 3 years (we've broken up twice but it's been 2 years since we got back together.) I started to think I was poly before I met her, and communicated that. She was initially "okay" with us entering into an open relationship (but it wasn't really...
  8. M

    Am I really poly? Am I just horny? Is it something else entirely?

    I haven't done it... successfully. I tried to make a relationship work as an OR with someone who definitely wasn't suited for it, it just lead to unhappiness. So I don't know what it's like yet. I'm definitely okay with partners having other relationships and sexual relations. It's okay if...
  9. M

    Am I really poly? Am I just horny? Is it something else entirely?

    I came here because I've been struggling to find answers about my own relationship identity. I've never really been happy in a monogamous relationship, and most often in relationships I've felt like I've wanted to be physically intimate with someone else. So when I found out about poly, it...
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