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Keeping this one short: My partner goes out on a date every night. They have so many partners I don’t even know all their names. At least ten, in constant flux. They don’t want me to know these people at all. I accidentally met their favorite partner, for about 30 seconds at a bar, and my...

This is more of a general relationship question, specifically meant for kinksters and those with experience in that realm. I was recently in a situation where my primary was involved in fairly heavy impact play and lifestyle (evening or weekend-long) D/s play with her partner. I personally...

If you’re feeling hurt that this person slept with your friend, that’s a completely reasonable feeling. In particular if you’d already communicated that boundary. Had you explicitly told him, “hey, don’t sleep with my friends and family?” If so, he’s behaved terribly, and he owes you an apology...

Thanks for your support. It’s really hard, but so far there’s no malice and we’re handling it like people who still love each other but can’t be together. It’ll be a long haul. I think we’ll both make it though.

This seems like a situation where your boyfriend isn’t likely to compromise on poly. Reading between the lines, it seems like this far he’s tolerated your desire for the lifestyle, and has the idea that he can eventually talk you out of it. It’s possible you’ll be able to convince him to come...

I’ll skip serial quoating because I’m on my phone. In order: We’d been together for three years before we went poly, have been married for two. My wife wanted to be open for a long time, and slowly convinced me using rational argument. She initially wanted a no-strings kink partner (pretty...

Thank you all for your advice. Thanks for confirming that this situation was as insane as I suspected. And thank you for pointing out how I was doing a poor job of enforcing my boundaries. A few more things came out last night that added new dimensions to this situation, and I finally had...

You mention early on that you announced you aren’t comfortable with hierarchical poly. That might be a kind of intimidating thing to say at the outset of a relationship, especially when you’re the new person. How do J and S feel about hierarchies? It’s possible S feels threatened by you for that...

Sorry this is so long. Thanks to any who have the patience. My wife and I have been polyamorous for about three and a half years, and she has been dating her current long-term-partner for about three. We had initially agreed to a primary/secondary model with veto power; however that has...