Daddy just decided that we should “take a break” so that I can get to know this other man better. I don’t know what to say or do right now. I thought it was ok but now I am thinking maybe that it isn’t. He is saying for a month or two but I don’t know if I know how to be without him that long. He isn’t just Daddy or boyfriend, he is also my best friend. He doesn’t think I can focus on both of them, and still get to know the other man. I don’t know what to do.
Advice please!!
- Thread starter Honeycomb
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PolyNatural
Banned
The way I look at relationships where there is love between one another is that all other potential deal breakers being in the tolerance range, that when one partner arbitrarily discards the other, or puts up barriers, or requires that the relationship "take a break" ( whatever the case may be ), over the involvement of another potential partner, that it is unfair and IMO not entirely mature. I'd suggest that a "best friend" wouldn't do that unless they were perhaps wrestling with some nasty feelings that they don't know how to handle any other way.
What I'd suggest is to be the mature one and not agree to any specific terms, but just give yourself some distance and breathing room so that you can get your own self focused, and let them come to you of their own free will if and when it feels right for them. You're not making any promises of exclusivity to anyone ( I presume ), so whoever can handle that the best will ultimately emerge as the most deserving of your time ( I would say ). Or to sum it up, maybe it's time for Daddy's Little Girl to grow up.
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Sounds like you are getting mixed message from Daddy. It sounded like he was ok and now like maybe he's getting cold feet?
Is Daddy making a suggestion? If so so, you can say "No, thank you. I prefer not to take a break. I prefer to try this on for X weeks and if I cannot balance the two relationships then let it go and remain with you. Or... just skip it and stay with you."
You could state clearly what YOU want.
Is Daddy making a decision about his OWN participating level? He's bowing out with the intention of returning?
You can make a decision too. You can say "Nope. If that's the case then I don't want to bother with this poly thing. Just skip it."
If you are up for that approach and taking a break you can say "Ok, I will take you back in 1-2 months." And trust that he will come back after the time out.
Or if you feeling like he's playing mind games or something... you can say "No. You can bow out, but I don't want you to come back in 1-2 months."
If you guys cannot come to agreement on HOW to do this "becoming poly" thing? Just skip it.
If you are perfectly happy with just Daddy, don't bend into pretzels just to turn the threesome partner into something more like a BF.
Galagirl
Is Daddy making a suggestion? If so so, you can say "No, thank you. I prefer not to take a break. I prefer to try this on for X weeks and if I cannot balance the two relationships then let it go and remain with you. Or... just skip it and stay with you."
You could state clearly what YOU want.
Is Daddy making a decision about his OWN participating level? He's bowing out with the intention of returning?
You can make a decision too. You can say "Nope. If that's the case then I don't want to bother with this poly thing. Just skip it."
If you are up for that approach and taking a break you can say "Ok, I will take you back in 1-2 months." And trust that he will come back after the time out.
Or if you feeling like he's playing mind games or something... you can say "No. You can bow out, but I don't want you to come back in 1-2 months."
If you guys cannot come to agreement on HOW to do this "becoming poly" thing? Just skip it.
If you are perfectly happy with just Daddy, don't bend into pretzels just to turn the threesome partner into something more like a BF.
Galagirl
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Thank you Galagirl and PolyNatural......sometimes I forget that I have a choice in this too. I get so used to following orders that sometimes I forget. He said a month or 2 and he isn’t really giving me up. I would like to see if I can balance this poly relationship first. If after a few weeks it isn’t working, then I will make a decision from there. This is my life too and I should be happy, not stressed
You are welcome.
A domme only exists at the consent of the sub. You CHOOSE to follow orders and do power exchange in the daddy/little girl style.
Sounds like a plan. And yes. This IS your life, and you could be generally happy living it. Not all stressed out.
Galagirl
A domme only exists at the consent of the sub. You CHOOSE to follow orders and do power exchange in the daddy/little girl style.
Sounds like a plan. And yes. This IS your life, and you could be generally happy living it. Not all stressed out.
Galagirl