Asking For Trouble

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Well tjbjab123, I think we are making some progress. You're allowing that open/poly relationships might be possible (given the appropriate mindset) for some people, while noting that an open/poly relationship wouldn't be right for you. That's completely cool, there is nothing wrong with monogamy (as long as it is done well).

You point out that the more people that are involved in a composite relationship, the more things there are that might go wrong. That makes sense ... it's just that I would also suggest there are more things that could go right. There's a tool that's right for every job. Some jobs call for a simple screwdriver, others call for a sophisticated robot. The robot has more parts which means more can go wrong, but when it's working right, its grace and power are wonders to behold.
 
And saying *you* couldn't handle it or accept it with *your* girlfriend is a valid point.

Being argumentative and confrontational, and saying or implying that polyamory can NEVER work because NO ONE is capable of handling it or accepting it... not so valid.

My husband does not have any other partners, sexual or romantic. He doesn't want any. I do have another partner. My current boyfriend is the third boyfriend I've had since Hubby suggested opening our marriage three years ago, and I've had a few friends-with-benefits as well.

Note that I just said *Hubby* suggested opening our marriage. Despite *his* not wanting any other partners. He understood that there were some sexual interests I had that he didn't share, so he suggested I find other partners to explore those things with. Other MALE partners, because I am heterosexual. And Hubby is completely okay with it. Not only that, but knowing I have sex with other guys is a turn-on for him.

You can speak for *yourself* about whether you would be able or willing to deal with a polyamorous relationship, but your first several posts were blanket statements about polyamorous relationships in general, and that was your fallacy. *You* wouldn't do polyamory. You don't *personally* know any "happy" poly people. That does not preclude the existence of men who are entirely content with having polyamorous relationships and/or their wives having polyamorous relationships. My marriage is very happy; it is, in fact, the best it's ever been right now. My relationship with Woody is also very happy. His relationships with his other partners are apparently happy; at least I haven't heard any differently.

And Hubby and Woody, incidentally, have become friends, to the point of socializing a couple of times without me present.
 
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