Back to being single / meeting new couples

Since I had to unfortunately end my partnership with a Poly couple here I am a Single male again, I think a lot of us have tried the dating apps with our own opinions of the results or lack their of . I already know the “No single men; Bi women & Couples only” is unavoidable it’s just the price of admission

I’m equally just as tired of telling a woman I’m Ethical Non Monogamous, Poly and almost always the first response is somewhere along the lines of Oh so you want to screw as many women as possible ? Or I EXPECT a man to be Holy devoted to me and have no eyes for anyone else but me (guessing you didnt read my profike first) and i refuse to play the blow smoke up tjeir butts and them all the sweet nothings to better my chances at a date just to drop it on them later

i dont go to bars ; that scene is too ugly for my
tastes. I live in a major tourist area Gatlinburg TN so their is absolutely no shortage of “ on vacation looking for our Hot Bi female” to join us . Really puts a damper on the dating pool
 
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You can always move to a poly Mecca like Portland, Seattle, NYC, etc. Lots of people move to areas that reflect their values better than where they grew up. Is that an option for you?
 
You can always move to a poly Mecca like Portland, Seattle, NYC, etc. Lots of people move to areas that reflect their values better than where they grew up. Is that an option for you?
I’m actually Wisconsin born and raised , I bought my first house down here in the Smokey Mountains , it’s beautiful here but I have nothing tying me to this area. Never know what the future holds . I have a lot of freedom to do what I want when I want it’s a beautiful thing
 
Another misplaced Cheaderhead. 👍. My wife has had issues with guys willing to communicate. She has done the Tinder thing with fair success. Followup from the other side is poor.
 
Another misplaced Cheaderhead. 👍. My wife has had issues with guys willing to communicate. She has done the Tinder thing with fair success. Followup from the other side is poor.
It’s kind of funny when I’ve had friends in the lifestyle themselves Married Couples . Oh you’re attractive, have a good job, you’re respectful I don’t get it why you’re having a hard time .. we just got 20 messages before lunch today … Sigh

Go Pack Go
 
I just want to raise a point here which everyone knows, but runs a bit counter to some advice and I feel is being overlooked.

I am in a very poly-friendly city. This really only means that I see ENM/poly-spectrum folks more often - the amount of single guys who are monogamous looking for "easy sex" is the same as any other city. So much of the struggle is the same. I really think the long-term solution is a better-vetted website for poly folks. SLS was great but cost a fair bit. Feeld is okay, but my city is small and I am already out to 150 miles and I only had the app a few weeks with an occasional swiping. Match rate has been decent (relative to other guys) but I get the same "we have strict rules because another guy did x, y, z."
 
I just want to raise a point here which everyone knows, but runs a bit counter to some advice and I feel is being overlooked.

I am in a very poly-friendly city. This really only means that I see ENM/poly-spectrum folks more often - the amount of single guys who are monogamous looking for "easy sex" is the same as any other city. So much of the struggle is the same. I really think the long-term solution is a better-vetted website for poly folks. SLS was great but cost a fair bit. Feeld is okay, but my city is small and I am already out to 150 miles and I only had the app a few weeks with an occasional swiping. Match rate has been decent (relative to other guys) but I get the same "we have strict rules because another guy did x, y, z."
I can understand why a lot of couples don’t welcome single men into their dynamic . Bottom line a lot of single men have ruined it for a lot of people. I’ve been in the lifestyle since I was 17 I’m 42 now . I can remember when one swinger group in particular had to eventually ban single men for a while because single women and couples were so uncomfortable with the not respecting boundaries , trying to get the wife to see him on the side, welcoming themselves into situations they weren’t invited into because they though the swinger life would be a free for all to check off all their fantasies

on the other end I heir are some men with double standards and insecurities; he can have w girlfriend but she can’t go see other men and in a lot of ways just like the swinger community it it’s a single men involved he has to bring a “dish to pass” so theirs a change he gets his too .
 
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