Being a hinge is hard

Noyse

Member
I've wanted to made a general 'how to hinge' post since I've been scouring the archives with little success; but then I realized the situations depend so much on the individuals involved, that it would really be of little use.

Until I found a generic problem: How do I buy condoms?

Things were simple in my first relationship. I was an arm in a V, and my partner and I preferred the same style of condom; we just bought the number of condoms we could afford, and when that pile ran low the other partner would buy the next bunch.

Now my partners prefer a different style condom than I do. One partner got me a stock pile of his favorite style, but that is now running low. Since there is a very real likelihood that I'm gonna dip into that drawer to use with my other partner, I don't want to make one partner solely responsible for it.


So internet, what should I do?
 
Buy your own supply of the kinds of condoms each of your lovers prefer, and keep them separate if they're that picky. I always make sure I have a supply, both at home and in my handbag. I will grab a handful whenever I go somewhere that has free ones in a bowl or something, and I've sent for assorted sampler packs now and then. If someone doesn't like the kind I buy, they can bring their own.

If you're taking turns, you can remind them when it's their turn, but I don't think I'd use the supply one lover bought for the other lover, unless he said it was okay. Have you just asked each of them to leave a stash at your place?

And... were you actually asking how to buy condoms? You can buy condoms online nowadays! I haven't bought there in a while, but I liked Undercover Condoms there's also condomania and drugstore.com, and I think you can also buy condoms at walmart.com. Or go to any drugstore.
 
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I just buy them. I assume that condoms at my house are mine, and I use them when I have sex at my house, and throw some in my bag when I think it's likely I might have sex elsewhere.

If the purchase is burdensome, either because I'm broke or because I'm with someone who has particular tastes in condoms, I'll ask partners to buy them. I am usually happy to buy them for my partners if they're broke or the errand is inconvenient.

I don't inventory other people's condom drawers ("Do we need more?" is as close as I think is appropriate to get), and I would be annoyed if someone tried to hold me accountable for the contents of mine.
 
Um, tell your other partner that you're running low, so they can contribute. That seems easy enough. When I am out dating new people, I always have condoms with me, and usually 2-3 different styles. I pretty much hate all condoms, but I know some guys have preferences. I feel I am responsible for my own sexual health though, so I don't rely on new partners to be prepared. Plus, sometimes they are stupid and have the wrong siize (this has happened at least twice to me). If I am in an established relationship, with a guy that has a preference, I'll tell him our stash is running low and to pick up more.
 
And... were you actually asking how to buy condoms? You can buy condoms online nowadays! I haven't bought there in a while, but I liked Undercover Condoms there's also condomania and drugstore.com, and I think you can also buy condoms at walmart.com. Or go to any drugstore.

Haha I wasn't (my preferred style of condom is female, so I'm well versed in internet ordering) but your link has the best price on one of my lover's favorite condoms so thank you!

When I am out dating new people, I always have condoms with me, and usually 2-3 different styles. I pretty much hate all condoms, but I know some guys have preferences.

Yeah, I haven't been sexually active that long, so I'm figuring out the system of 'if we only have this many of your favorite, and this many of mine, and this many of the back ups, are we fine?'
 
I buy my favorite if I'm buying condoms. Boy buys his favorite if he's buying condoms. Hubby buys his favorite if he's buying condoms. Whoever has the time buys the condoms. ha
 
Yeah, I haven't been sexually active that long, so I'm figuring out the system of 'if we only have this many of your favorite, and this many of mine, and this many of the back ups, are we fine?'

Talk to your partners. Just bring it up matter-of-fact. "How many condoms do you think we ought to keep in the stash before buying more?"

Now my partners prefer a different style condom than I do. One partner got me a stock pile of his favorite style, but that is now running low. Since there is a very real likelihood that I'm gonna dip into that drawer to use with my other partner, I don't want to make one partner solely responsible for it.

I think that practicing safer sex with ANY condom brand is better than not using one. I would like to think no partner is going to be so penny-pinching that they get mad you used "their" condoms with the other partner in a bind.

That said, everyone could buy their own and bring their own. Or if they leave a stash at someone else's house, just monitor it and buy more as needed. Just like any other household good -- toothpaste, toilet paper, etc. If something is low at your home that they are responsible for buying, give them the heads up. Maybe they hadn't noticed. But it doesn't have to be a big deal.

Galagirl
 
I buy whatever kind I like and make sure to have one on me if I'm going out on a date. All my partners have been prepared with their own of the brand/style that they prefer and are happy to supply them too. If it was a problem of cost I wouldn't mind paying for them though.
 
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