Hello Friends and the like...
I'm new to the forum... (obviously). I am a 33 year old female in a committed 10 year relationship with a man- my husband. Last September (8 months ago) I realized I'm gay. The first person I told was my best friend and husband.
I have been sure from the beginning that our relationship and friendship was strong enough to withstand this major shift in direction- which lead us to poly.
The hiccup is that we are no longer romantically/sexually involved. I'm pretty sure that still qualifies as poly but not sure. We've both started dating other people.
I dated first- mostly to make sure that I was gay. I realized my homosexuality in a more intellectual way than being attracted to a friend or having a relationship with a woman first. I met a wonderful woman online and we hit it off from the beginning. We rented a room in an incredible hotel and spent the night together. I was hooked! We dated for a few months and I was doing ok, even better when my husband started dating. Things were going smoothly until my gf started saying she loved me and changing her life plans to fit mine. I realized that I am not good at having what I originally thought I wanted, a relaxed, uncommitted relationship with her. I think I'm an all or nothing lesbian. We broke up last week. Now I'm a f-ing wreck.
All of a sudden I am completely freaked out about my husband's, non committed relationship with his first girl thing. I have been hysterically crying three times in the last week!
I'm pretty sure I can do this but... this is really hard! The disconnect between my rational self and my emotional self is distressing. I'm rationally okay with him dating but emotionally I am a wreck!
I'm sure this will get easier but right now I feel really out of sorts.
Thanks for reading
I'm new to the forum... (obviously). I am a 33 year old female in a committed 10 year relationship with a man- my husband. Last September (8 months ago) I realized I'm gay. The first person I told was my best friend and husband.
I have been sure from the beginning that our relationship and friendship was strong enough to withstand this major shift in direction- which lead us to poly.
The hiccup is that we are no longer romantically/sexually involved. I'm pretty sure that still qualifies as poly but not sure. We've both started dating other people.
I dated first- mostly to make sure that I was gay. I realized my homosexuality in a more intellectual way than being attracted to a friend or having a relationship with a woman first. I met a wonderful woman online and we hit it off from the beginning. We rented a room in an incredible hotel and spent the night together. I was hooked! We dated for a few months and I was doing ok, even better when my husband started dating. Things were going smoothly until my gf started saying she loved me and changing her life plans to fit mine. I realized that I am not good at having what I originally thought I wanted, a relaxed, uncommitted relationship with her. I think I'm an all or nothing lesbian. We broke up last week. Now I'm a f-ing wreck.
All of a sudden I am completely freaked out about my husband's, non committed relationship with his first girl thing. I have been hysterically crying three times in the last week!
I'm pretty sure I can do this but... this is really hard! The disconnect between my rational self and my emotional self is distressing. I'm rationally okay with him dating but emotionally I am a wreck!
I'm sure this will get easier but right now I feel really out of sorts.
Thanks for reading
