ramanda429
New member
Hello, I am new on here. So here is a little bit about me
Im 25 and have a daughter and have been in a commited relationship for nearly 7 years. We love each other very much and like most couples have problems that we have to work out.
In the past my partner( we aren't engaged or married but I think saying he is my boyfriend doesn't work either because cover our full relationship), anyways in the past he has mentioned polyamory but i could see that he worried about bringing up the topic because he thought I would think it was wrong. I don't and although I wasn't particualry intrested in the topic at the time I felt that i handled him bringing it up well. I didn't automatically assume he was looking for someone else because i wasn't measuring up to what he needed. After our initial conversation he dropped it like he was ashamed or feared i would judge him. Anyways that was several years ago. But in the last week he brought it up again and it peaked my interest more. I told him we could talk about it more, at the time our daughter was awake so it wasn't a suitable time to be discussing it. Since then he hasn't brought it up and I have done some research and read a lot of stories about people who are in a committed relationship of three. My intrest in continuting to grow, but now I'm worried about talking to him about it because I think it would be something to consider but i dont know if he will think i want to talk about it because it would probably be something to make him happy.
Our biggest issue in our relationship is the amount of porn he has been watching and the fact that he joined an online dating site. I was very upset because him hiding it felt as though he was trying to find someone else. I usually don't mind the amount of porn he watches but when he is joining a dating site ill admit it ruffled my feathers a lot. I am not the most sexual person and i go through phases where I want it a lot and then there are times when I don't want it at all. For him he would be happy with a lot more.
He brought up the fact that he is missing out of something in his life. I don't think he realizes I feel the same way yet. As much as we love each other it is like there is something big missing from our relationship. we communicate, trust one another, and respect one another. Our relationship is fairly good even when we have a disagreement we talk it out. Both of us are pretty foreward to letting the other know what we are feeling, but this topic is one that has been hanging over both our heads for years. It's one topic that seems to be one we are afraid of discussing in depth. My fear is a long the lines of him thinking im not happy with him. I have no idea what his real fear is, but I feel this is something we need to actually sit down and talk about laying it all out there.
So do I just bring the conversation up again or wait to see if he does? Each day I struggle with this because I don't like there to be secrets between us or fears.
Im 25 and have a daughter and have been in a commited relationship for nearly 7 years. We love each other very much and like most couples have problems that we have to work out.
In the past my partner( we aren't engaged or married but I think saying he is my boyfriend doesn't work either because cover our full relationship), anyways in the past he has mentioned polyamory but i could see that he worried about bringing up the topic because he thought I would think it was wrong. I don't and although I wasn't particualry intrested in the topic at the time I felt that i handled him bringing it up well. I didn't automatically assume he was looking for someone else because i wasn't measuring up to what he needed. After our initial conversation he dropped it like he was ashamed or feared i would judge him. Anyways that was several years ago. But in the last week he brought it up again and it peaked my interest more. I told him we could talk about it more, at the time our daughter was awake so it wasn't a suitable time to be discussing it. Since then he hasn't brought it up and I have done some research and read a lot of stories about people who are in a committed relationship of three. My intrest in continuting to grow, but now I'm worried about talking to him about it because I think it would be something to consider but i dont know if he will think i want to talk about it because it would probably be something to make him happy.
Our biggest issue in our relationship is the amount of porn he has been watching and the fact that he joined an online dating site. I was very upset because him hiding it felt as though he was trying to find someone else. I usually don't mind the amount of porn he watches but when he is joining a dating site ill admit it ruffled my feathers a lot. I am not the most sexual person and i go through phases where I want it a lot and then there are times when I don't want it at all. For him he would be happy with a lot more.
He brought up the fact that he is missing out of something in his life. I don't think he realizes I feel the same way yet. As much as we love each other it is like there is something big missing from our relationship. we communicate, trust one another, and respect one another. Our relationship is fairly good even when we have a disagreement we talk it out. Both of us are pretty foreward to letting the other know what we are feeling, but this topic is one that has been hanging over both our heads for years. It's one topic that seems to be one we are afraid of discussing in depth. My fear is a long the lines of him thinking im not happy with him. I have no idea what his real fear is, but I feel this is something we need to actually sit down and talk about laying it all out there.
So do I just bring the conversation up again or wait to see if he does? Each day I struggle with this because I don't like there to be secrets between us or fears.