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LittleUrsa

LittleUrsa

New member
Hello all, my name is Ursa, or Little Bear if you'd prefer! I found out I was polyamourous about...five years ago while dating my boyfriend at the time. There was always mention of me having a girl on the side, but the more we spoke about it and the more I looked into it I found I didn't want someone on the side, I wanted two partners who knew each other and could interact as friends.

Even though my relationship with my last boyfriend didn't work out, I am glad I was dating someone who was supportive of me and open to trying a different lifestyle. I tried dating a second person twice, the first time the person felt they weren't ready for it or into woman, and the second time I found my previous girlfriend who would continue to stand by my side even after the relationship with my boyfriend fell though.

Now I'm single, and not really sure how to go about things. I'm not really interested in walking into a relationship between two people already, I find nothing wrong with it I'd just prefer to get to know people one on one, and not two on one. I'm also not sure how to go about dating since I know I'm polyamourous and can't pretend otherwise. I guess I should also mention that all my relationships have been online, I've met a few of my partners in person (my last girlfriend and boyfriend included) but long distance has been the name of the game for a while now. I'm a little new to the whole world of dating outside of the interwebs, and not sure what foot to place where.
 
Hi there Ursa

Hi there Ursa Im Jill.. I just wanted to say hello.

If you ever need the perspective from the third person coming into a relationship let me know.. Its something I know and am learning about..
 
Hi Jill! Thanks for the greeting! I'd really like to hear what its like to join a couple, especially since I've been the one inviting people to join, not looking for an invite!
 
Greetings Ursa,
Welcome to our forum. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.

There are a couple of poly-friendly dating sites if you decide to go that way, or if you want to "take it offline," you could start by looking for local poly groups in your area. These groups might have potlucks and social outings and stuff, and you can join up and meet some poly people IRL.

Local poly groups can often be found by googling "polyamory" with the name of your State or nearest major city. I can also give you some hyperlinks and a few further ideas if you're interested.

Glad you could join our site in any case!
Sincerely,
Kevin T., "official greeter" :)

Notes:

There's a *lot* of good info in Golden Nuggets. Have a look!

Please read through the guidelines if you haven't already.

Note: You needn't read every reply to your posts, especially if someone posts in a disagreeable way. Given the size and scope of the site it's hard not to run into the occasional disagreeable person. Please contact the mods if you do (or if you see any spam), and you can block the person if you want.

If you have any questions about the board itself, please private-message a mod and they'll do their best to help.

Welcome aboard!
 
Thanks for the warm welcome Kdt! I've been thinking about checking out the local meetings, but I'm paranoid it'll be a group of sweaty creepy people aka a trap and I'll never make it home alive. Not that being poly makes you a killer I just live in a state that has some pretty sketchy people. And areas. And government. But yeah, I'm sure I'll push past my irrational fears and actually get my butt moving on that. Worst case scenario, I bring a friend and we both die together. (Please laugh at my terrible humor)

Dating sites also look good, the only thing that makes reluctant to try that again is my past history of being harassed by people who wanted to have a quickie, not a relationship.
 
Yeah, for some reason women seem to get the one-night-stand creeps, if not worse. As for poly groups, alas you're not in Albuquerque, otherwise I could recommend that city's group.

Bring a friend with you for your first poly group potluck. Then if they put you in the stew at least you know they'll have enough meat. :eek: ;)
 
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