Oamaru Blue
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Gotta go
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Gotta go
- Thread starter Oamaru Blue
- Start date
I think this article could be a guide for you to figure out how the logistics could work ahead of time.
Not only that, you also do seem very involved with her mental health issues, which is very understandable. But if you embark on an ENM journey, it may be practical to disentangle in this area as well, so that you are not her primary (or even only, if that's the case!) support person, as well as her spouse. I don't think a smooth transition is possible if you are her mental health pillar.
Not only that, you also do seem very involved with her mental health issues, which is very understandable. But if you embark on an ENM journey, it may be practical to disentangle in this area as well, so that you are not her primary (or even only, if that's the case!) support person, as well as her spouse. I don't think a smooth transition is possible if you are her mental health pillar.
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You say your wife homeschools your children. Often, breastfeeding and attachment parenting go along with that kind of alternative educational choice. Did she practice those parenting choices, or was she/is she also "touch avoidant" with your children?
If so, could it be possible she is "touched out" by kids (and possibly pets) and will welcome more of your touch as the kids grow?
How many kids do you have? How did you manage to conceive with the asexuality? Did she used to be more open to sex? I have heard that asexuality can present in many different ways.
It really sucks when a couple's libidos do not align. One main reason I am polyamorous is because my sex drive is much much higher than my female partner's. Luckily, when we met, we were both already committed to polyamory, so I could always get my sex needs met elsewhere. Pixi and I do have sex, but it is very infrequent. We do cuddle and kiss, which is nice, but sometimes frustrating, because she'll turn me on and leave me hanging. However, when I used to be in between boyfriends and very needy, she'd agree to hold me in bed while I took care of things down south, as long as I just had my arm around her, but didn't touch her breasts or nether regions. (Having a bf meet my sex needs doesn't erase my desire for her, but it does help in the long run, to make me a happier camper.)
Several years ago, I finally met the man of my dreams, and he's a horny person, like me, so all is well. I hope you two figure this out... Be brave. Taking care of your needs is important.
If so, could it be possible she is "touched out" by kids (and possibly pets) and will welcome more of your touch as the kids grow?
How many kids do you have? How did you manage to conceive with the asexuality? Did she used to be more open to sex? I have heard that asexuality can present in many different ways.
It really sucks when a couple's libidos do not align. One main reason I am polyamorous is because my sex drive is much much higher than my female partner's. Luckily, when we met, we were both already committed to polyamory, so I could always get my sex needs met elsewhere. Pixi and I do have sex, but it is very infrequent. We do cuddle and kiss, which is nice, but sometimes frustrating, because she'll turn me on and leave me hanging. However, when I used to be in between boyfriends and very needy, she'd agree to hold me in bed while I took care of things down south, as long as I just had my arm around her, but didn't touch her breasts or nether regions. (Having a bf meet my sex needs doesn't erase my desire for her, but it does help in the long run, to make me a happier camper.)
Several years ago, I finally met the man of my dreams, and he's a horny person, like me, so all is well. I hope you two figure this out... Be brave. Taking care of your needs is important.