How do you tell someone you're interested in that you're poly?

To play devil's advocate... I am TERRIBLE about reading a text/message while otherwise occupied so I can't respond then when I'm free to respond my brain thinks I already did so I completely forget. So I would read more into her behavior over time. If it is all the time, days on end... Then she clearly isn't thinking of you as often.
 
To play devil's advocate... I am TERRIBLE about reading a text/message while otherwise occupied so I can't respond then when I'm free to respond my brain thinks I already did so I completely forget. So I would read more into her behavior over time. If it is all the time, days on end... Then she clearly isn't thinking of you as often.

Have you tried OKCupid?

I have! :( Not much luck there, I had a LOT of couples reaching out to me and asking me to be their unicorn, even though I made my intentions very clear on my profile (but you know, people don't read anything other than "bi" these days..). Same with Tinder. I wish they had a poly-only Tinder version :p
 
To play devil's advocate... I am TERRIBLE about reading a text/message while otherwise occupied so I can't respond then when I'm free to respond my brain thinks I already did so I completely forget. So I would read more into her behavior over time. If it is all the time, days on end... Then she clearly isn't thinking of you as often.

I really like that you mention this AlwaysGrowing, because it feels like the initial response to her here was to damn her (lol), but through-out yesterday she was messaging me kind of spotty but much more frequently. She even sent me a little meme about plants (I love plants) which I thought was a cute gesture. But I'm mushy like that, easy to please -- always my weakness.

I think the overall consensus I guess is, as you said, that if it's days at a time and often, to drop it and try not to take it too hard, as well as give her the same energy she gives to me -- not more. I am taking it as it goes for now but also keeping myself open and looking around in case this doesn't go anywhere.

You all are so great!!!
 
Hi bunni,
Here's a few other sites you can try besides OKC:

Besides dating sites, you can also look for local poly groups in your area, attend some of their get-togethers, make some poly friends, and then after awhile, who knows, a friend may evolve into something more than a friend. Also you can look to make friends at events that aren't necessarily poly, but may be considered poly-friendly:

"As for where to meet poly people, if by some chance you are interested in anything alternative like Renaissance fairs, goth culture, sci-fi conventions, indie music, bdsm, or any small fringe group, you will be more likely to meet people who have at least heard of poly and are accepting of it."
-- SpaceHippieGeek, Polyamorous Percolations

And even if it's not an "alternative" type group, if there's a club or something in your area that does something you're interested in, you can always join that group and it just gives you a way to get out there and meet people. If you meet someone on a platonic level and get to talking about poly, then they can decide how they feel about it without any "pressure to agree." Then if they do decide poly doesn't bother them too much, and some kind of romantic connection subsequently develops, you'll already have "had the poly conversation" with them.

Anyway, just some ideas.
Sincerely,
Kevin T.
 
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