Kevin's Hetero MFM Poly-Fi V
- Thread starter kdt26417
- Start date
One wedding down, one more to go. Brother-Husband is coming home late tomorrow night. I expect I'll been in bed by the time he gets here. Snowbunny comes home on the 26th, Monday evening. I'm sure Brother-Husband will drive to the airport to pick her up, and maybe I'll be along for the ride.
Besides two Michigan weddings to attend, Snowbunny has a class in Texas to take, so she is doing a lot of flying.
Besides two Michigan weddings to attend, Snowbunny has a class in Texas to take, so she is doing a lot of flying.
There is a great photo of Brother-Husband and Snowbunny on Facebook; I saved it in my own files. All the comments there spoke of what a lovely couple they are, and I have to agree, wistfully. I don't think we will ever be out of the closet, I will never be a part of their married couplehood, not in a way that is celebrated publicly. It makes me a little sad, but then I remember the many sins I've committed and the very easy life I live right now and I think, No, it's fair; it's more than fair.
Meantime, I have a great photo of Brother-Husband and Snowbunny on my computer. He's got a cool suit on with purple highlights in his shirt and tie, she has a lovely dress and gold hoop earrings and looks hot.
Meantime, I have a great photo of Brother-Husband and Snowbunny on my computer. He's got a cool suit on with purple highlights in his shirt and tie, she has a lovely dress and gold hoop earrings and looks hot.
What Do I Mean by Poly-Fi?
Not sure if it's needed, but here's how I define poly-fi.
It is short for polyfidelitous. My V is polyfidelitous, which I think means we don't consider ourselves free to go out and have sex outside the three of us. I do however think it is possible to add to the V (making it an N or what have you). But it would be a process and would take some time. The new person would have to be friends with all three of us before they were added to the V.
So we operate under some restrictions. It works for us though, I mean we're not even interested in pursuing any new partners, although we are open to the possibility. I know I am.
I think that some folks define poly-fi as no new partners, ever. I don't think my V takes it that far. Just so I'm not misunderstood here.
Not sure if it's needed, but here's how I define poly-fi.
It is short for polyfidelitous. My V is polyfidelitous, which I think means we don't consider ourselves free to go out and have sex outside the three of us. I do however think it is possible to add to the V (making it an N or what have you). But it would be a process and would take some time. The new person would have to be friends with all three of us before they were added to the V.
So we operate under some restrictions. It works for us though, I mean we're not even interested in pursuing any new partners, although we are open to the possibility. I know I am.
I think that some folks define poly-fi as no new partners, ever. I don't think my V takes it that far. Just so I'm not misunderstood here.
Last edited:
Bluebird
Well-known member
I'm with you - I will never again try to add to my V without everyone in the network getting along. The fact that my ex had a best friend that hated my guts and was emotionally abusive - that will be a 100% full stop if that sort of thing happens again. I have always been a big proponent of, not everyone has to be friends, but come to think of it, my very first poly partner had a wife that didn't like me and that ended not so good. After this last go-round, nope. Too much stress!
I hear you Bluebird. I think your style of poly is similar to mine, in that you don't just date people, you tend to live with them. In those kinds of close quarters, it matters that everyone be on friendly terms with each other. This goes for friends of friends too. You can't have a friendship with someone whose other friend is driving a wedge between you and the someone. Snowbunny is very adamant that anyone we add to our V will have to be more than just a friend. They'll have to share a profound closeness with us, even those of us they aren't romantic partners with.
And I didn't take the opportunity to say I'm sorry that you lost your ex. From my viewpoint, things with him often seemed to be headed in a bad direction, but I didn't want to say anything because I hoped it would all work out. I am thinking your ex and his best friend both played a hand in the eventual breakup between him and you. So again I am sorry, and I don't think you were to be faulted for this one. That's my opinion anyway.
I hope it's okay for me to say these things here. It's long overdue but, better late than never.
When you have marriagelike poly relationships, you do have to be extra cautious about adding someone new.
And I didn't take the opportunity to say I'm sorry that you lost your ex. From my viewpoint, things with him often seemed to be headed in a bad direction, but I didn't want to say anything because I hoped it would all work out. I am thinking your ex and his best friend both played a hand in the eventual breakup between him and you. So again I am sorry, and I don't think you were to be faulted for this one. That's my opinion anyway.
I hope it's okay for me to say these things here. It's long overdue but, better late than never.
When you have marriagelike poly relationships, you do have to be extra cautious about adding someone new.
Snowbunny comes home on Monday evening. She has had a couple of busy weeks. Two weddings in Michigan, with a computer class in Texas in between. She has been on a lot of planes. Plus since she is currently in western Michigan, I think she has an extra plane to get her to the Detroit Metro Airport.
Brother-Husband is working today but off tomorrow. When he gets off work this evening he's planning to get Little Caesar's for the two of us. He loves Little Caesar's, especially if it's a square pizza.
Brother-Husband is working today but off tomorrow. When he gets off work this evening he's planning to get Little Caesar's for the two of us. He loves Little Caesar's, especially if it's a square pizza.
A guy came over today to work on some of our electrical stuff. He just got done and took off a few minutes ago, I'm not sure exactly what he was working on but it sounds like the work was completed successfully.
My window is open today, it's not too chilly out there. In fact, I've been hearing the ice cream truck. With its fancy tunes, playing stuff like Für Elise.
Tomorrow evening, Snowbunny comes home.
My window is open today, it's not too chilly out there. In fact, I've been hearing the ice cream truck. With its fancy tunes, playing stuff like Für Elise.
Tomorrow evening, Snowbunny comes home.
It's Sunday, the one day of each week when Brother-Husband and Snowbunny are both off on the same day. Brother-Husband is watching a football game, I think the Seattle Seahawks are playing but don't quote me on that. I think Snowbunny is working on a dated laptop trying to get it in working order so that Brother-Husband can use it. I am lucky to have a very new laptop that works fine, and it's nice to be able to take it on trips but I still miss my old computer (the one that died).
It's cooler outside, but we haven't had any rain today, at least not yet.
Well that's all I have to report right now. It's another blissfully boring day at our house.
It's cooler outside, but we haven't had any rain today, at least not yet.
Well that's all I have to report right now. It's another blissfully boring day at our house.