Love, Family, Friendship
- Thread starter riftara
- Start date
Yule 2012
John and I decided to take a step back and focus on rebuilding our relationship. His anger issues were really starting to get to me and make me uncomfortable and generally sad.
We decided I'd end things with Viggo. I invited him over, and he came with my Yule presents, a diamond watch from Bulova and a diamond necklace. John sent me a text telling me not to break up with him.
So we are going to try to make rebuilding us happen without ending things with Viggo, because after a thoughtful gift "to remind me to make time for myself," that has such a large price tag, we couldn't end things now.
John and I decided to take a step back and focus on rebuilding our relationship. His anger issues were really starting to get to me and make me uncomfortable and generally sad.
We decided I'd end things with Viggo. I invited him over, and he came with my Yule presents, a diamond watch from Bulova and a diamond necklace. John sent me a text telling me not to break up with him.
So we are going to try to make rebuilding us happen without ending things with Viggo, because after a thoughtful gift "to remind me to make time for myself," that has such a large price tag, we couldn't end things now.
Omg omg omg
I just got off the phone with Ronan. He's going to come live with me for 6 months and try out a V with me and John. His 6 months will start sometime between February and July, depending on what his school does to him and when I can get out there to pick him up.
I'm so excited and happy! I'm going nuts right now thinking about what this means, how we are going to make it work. I have so much on my mind. But I'm happy he said yes when I asked him to come out. Now I have to figure out how and when to get him out here, and so much other stuff. But we are going to have a real shot at this.
I just got off the phone with Ronan. He's going to come live with me for 6 months and try out a V with me and John. His 6 months will start sometime between February and July, depending on what his school does to him and when I can get out there to pick him up.
I'm so excited and happy! I'm going nuts right now thinking about what this means, how we are going to make it work. I have so much on my mind. But I'm happy he said yes when I asked him to come out. Now I have to figure out how and when to get him out here, and so much other stuff. But we are going to have a real shot at this.
John and I had a long talk about Ronan coming out here, and us being a V and everything. At first we argued, but then we settled down and actually had a conversation about it. John wants to wait until August when he gets back from his school that he has to go to.
I'm okay with that. It gives us time to get used to the baby being here, to save to move, and to find a place that will let us have our big dog. This town is very anti-big-dogs in rentals. It also allows Ronan and me time to hammer out our relationship without putting pressure on him in any way.
I think this is going to work out nicely. I'm excited!
I'm okay with that. It gives us time to get used to the baby being here, to save to move, and to find a place that will let us have our big dog. This town is very anti-big-dogs in rentals. It also allows Ronan and me time to hammer out our relationship without putting pressure on him in any way.
I think this is going to work out nicely. I'm excited!
I feel like writing.
I talked to Ronan about John's requirements some, and I'm going to talk to him some more about it tonight. My goal is to not overwhelm him with restrictions, rules or boundaries right now. There will be time to hammer out those things later.
John wants us out of this house. Well, that's not accurate. We can't live with Ronan here, so we have to get out of this house, which we can't do until June. So we are going to pack everything up, go out to GA for a month, and then come back to TX and find a place. All of us in a hotel room and the dog in a kennel will motivate me to find a place quick!
We have to save money for the move-- about $3000, to cover the hotel, down payments on the house and utilities. I'm going to save half our tax returns for that, and then some every month, which will be hard for me, as I'm not a saver!
I've also got to have money for my mom to come out and help with the baby in April. She wants to stop twice for hotel rooms, instead of driving half way, so it will take her three days to get out here, and $600 of my money, twice, since my dad won't pay half like he said he would a few months ago.
I'm kinda stressed about the money stuff, since I just found out about my mom today, and just after I spent another hundred on baby stuff. I know everything will be okay, but it's still stressful for me.
I have to get serious about money stuffs, and get it ingrained in me. I think I'll talk to my counselor about it next week.
I also need to talk to her about Ronan-- him living here, and us having a relationship, and what I need to do and how I should handle things. I love that our counselor is okay with us being polyamorous. She sees how close we are. She's really amazed sometimes that it works for us. She is never condescending or negative.
I'm giving back Viggo's presents to me. I'm not sure when, but I am. My counselor suggested it. She pointed out that it wasn't really appropriate for him to give me that jewelry. It may indicate some hidden agenda, or it may not, but if it made me uncomfortable, then I should give it back.
I'm sick. It's really bothering me, too. Hacking up my left lung (or is it my right?) and feeling so much pain is getting to me.
I talked to Ronan about John's requirements some, and I'm going to talk to him some more about it tonight. My goal is to not overwhelm him with restrictions, rules or boundaries right now. There will be time to hammer out those things later.
John wants us out of this house. Well, that's not accurate. We can't live with Ronan here, so we have to get out of this house, which we can't do until June. So we are going to pack everything up, go out to GA for a month, and then come back to TX and find a place. All of us in a hotel room and the dog in a kennel will motivate me to find a place quick!
We have to save money for the move-- about $3000, to cover the hotel, down payments on the house and utilities. I'm going to save half our tax returns for that, and then some every month, which will be hard for me, as I'm not a saver!
I've also got to have money for my mom to come out and help with the baby in April. She wants to stop twice for hotel rooms, instead of driving half way, so it will take her three days to get out here, and $600 of my money, twice, since my dad won't pay half like he said he would a few months ago.
I'm kinda stressed about the money stuff, since I just found out about my mom today, and just after I spent another hundred on baby stuff. I know everything will be okay, but it's still stressful for me.
I have to get serious about money stuffs, and get it ingrained in me. I think I'll talk to my counselor about it next week.
I also need to talk to her about Ronan-- him living here, and us having a relationship, and what I need to do and how I should handle things. I love that our counselor is okay with us being polyamorous. She sees how close we are. She's really amazed sometimes that it works for us. She is never condescending or negative.
I'm giving back Viggo's presents to me. I'm not sure when, but I am. My counselor suggested it. She pointed out that it wasn't really appropriate for him to give me that jewelry. It may indicate some hidden agenda, or it may not, but if it made me uncomfortable, then I should give it back.
I'm sick. It's really bothering me, too. Hacking up my left lung (or is it my right?) and feeling so much pain is getting to me.
The thought had crossed my mind. I could likely get quite a bit for it. Seeing it sitting on the sink with my other jewelry is stressing me out, I know that.
Ronan says yes
I told Ronan that I needed assurance from him that him coming here wasn't going to change at the drop of a hat. I asked him to be my BF, long distance for now, so that if he changed his mind he could just break up with me, and I wouldn't feel the need to bug him about coming here.
He said he's still working things out with his baby momma. But yes, I think he understands where I'm coming from, at least.
I'll update my siggy!
I told Ronan that I needed assurance from him that him coming here wasn't going to change at the drop of a hat. I asked him to be my BF, long distance for now, so that if he changed his mind he could just break up with me, and I wouldn't feel the need to bug him about coming here.
He said he's still working things out with his baby momma. But yes, I think he understands where I'm coming from, at least.
I'll update my siggy!
I sold the watch. I found out it was a fake! If he knew, that pissed me off a little. I feel like he was trying to impress me, which I don't need. If he knew, which I'm not sure about, or even had an idea that it was a fake, then he tried to give me something that John never could. Not that I would allow John to spend that kind of money. If it were real, it would have cost about a grand. And now that I think about it, I know he didn't have that kind of money, so he had to know it was a fake. Damn it, he could have bought me a Fossil. It would have meant as much, and not looked like he was trying to impress me, and it wouldn't have made me uncomfortable.
I have no idea what to do now. I don't want to tell him I sold it, but I do kinda want to confront him in his intentions. Or maybe we just need to break up. Something isn't right, that's for sure. Either he's lying about what he wants from me, or he's very messed up, or something.
I just don't know!
I have no idea what to do now. I don't want to tell him I sold it, but I do kinda want to confront him in his intentions. Or maybe we just need to break up. Something isn't right, that's for sure. Either he's lying about what he wants from me, or he's very messed up, or something.
I just don't know!
SNeacail
New member
Gas, food and hotels for 6 days of driving is likely more expensive than one round-trip plane ticket. Watch for deals and other airports! An airport an hour or two away is still going to be less hassle than 6 days of driving. Around here, anything over an 8 hour drive (to a major city) is cheaper by plane, if it's only one person, and that doesn't require a hotel stay.
You said your husband was military. Check with family services and see what they might be able to offer in the way of help.
Yeah, I know. She will be bringing my son, and she insists on driving. It's really annoying to me, since I'm sure she will get here and not want to drive around, because she hates traffic. It is cheaper for her to drive, since our son will be with her, most likely, but it's still annoying that she won't take a bus!
I don't know what to do. My counselor said I'm taking advantage of Ronan. I don't want to do that, and Ronan says I'm not, but now I have it in my head that I have.
I'm holding back tears. I'm at work, I can't cry, not over this.
We are talking about it now, but I know these kinds of conversations are hard on him.
I'm holding back tears. I'm at work, I can't cry, not over this.
We are talking about it now, but I know these kinds of conversations are hard on him.
SNeacail
New member
Okay, your counselor called you on something you didn't realize you were doing, didn't intend to do, or truly may not be doing. Step back, look at your situation, and ask yourself, "Is it balanced?"
Have there been times where he has been the one taking more than he was giving? Some people work in cycles. If you think you could make changes, do it.
It happens to all of us. It will be okay.
Ronan and I talked. We are in limbo land, not together, but not apart, either. We have never really needed labels, though, and I think he's happier that way.
We are doing everything I want with us as a couple. We just aren't officially together.
On a side note, John is starting his own blog, so now everyone gets to see both sides of the story.
We are doing everything I want with us as a couple. We just aren't officially together.
On a side note, John is starting his own blog, so now everyone gets to see both sides of the story.
You're the two that I want
You're the two that I want
Some girls'll settle for just one
They don't know what they're missin' they ain't havin' any fun
You're the two that I want
Jane told Betty she saw me last night
She had her socks shocked off but she was tryin' to be polite
We were arm in arm in arm and that just didn't seem right
I was walkin' with my babies in my high heel shoes
Havin' so much fun I nearly lost my blues
You're the two that I want
He's a big strong boy he can bust out of chains
Says what he means he don't play no games
But you what you're missin' in muscle you make up for in brains
Between you two I got my two hands full
I got one to push and another one to pull
Two that I want
I can't believe this is happenin' to me
I'm just about as happy as a girl can be
With all this lovin' I feel wild and free
Maybe I should press my luck and try for three
You're the two that I want
Some girls'll settle for just one
They don't know what they're missin' they ain't havin' any fun
You're the two that I want
Jane told Betty she saw me last night
She had her socks shocked off but she was tryin' to be polite
We were arm in arm in arm and that just didn't seem right
I was walkin' with my babies in my high heel shoes
Havin' so much fun I nearly lost my blues
You're the two that I want
He's a big strong boy he can bust out of chains
Says what he means he don't play no games
But you what you're missin' in muscle you make up for in brains
Between you two I got my two hands full
I got one to push and another one to pull
Two that I want
I can't believe this is happenin' to me
I'm just about as happy as a girl can be
With all this lovin' I feel wild and free
Maybe I should press my luck and try for three
Times they are a-changing
I think things with Viggo are nearing their end. He hasn't contacted me in a week and a half, minus a "happy V-day" text. I'm giving him until Saturday, and if he can't hold up his end of the "once a week" deal, then I'm not getting my needs met. I've tried to voice them already, so it will be time to end things.
Ronan and I are doing good, talking about once a week, like we promised, and he's working things out on his end. I'm happy about that. We are planning to move to a place where he can live with us this fall.
I'm seeing a guy casually. He and his wife are poly. I see him about once a week right now, but I'd like it to be more, honestly. I can do with once a week if it's quality time, but occasionally it has been with John. He is busy, but he tries to make time for me and he is genuine and fun and WOAH NRE??!!??!!
I think things with Viggo are nearing their end. He hasn't contacted me in a week and a half, minus a "happy V-day" text. I'm giving him until Saturday, and if he can't hold up his end of the "once a week" deal, then I'm not getting my needs met. I've tried to voice them already, so it will be time to end things.
Ronan and I are doing good, talking about once a week, like we promised, and he's working things out on his end. I'm happy about that. We are planning to move to a place where he can live with us this fall.
I'm seeing a guy casually. He and his wife are poly. I see him about once a week right now, but I'd like it to be more, honestly. I can do with once a week if it's quality time, but occasionally it has been with John. He is busy, but he tries to make time for me and he is genuine and fun and WOAH NRE??!!??!!