Kate70410
New member
Hi Everyone,
I have been lurking for about a week now and thought it was time to introduce myself to the board. My name is Kate and I'm 36 years old and originally from NJ. I have identified as a lesbian for the past 36 years and before April 2014 I was a complete gold star but now have evolved more into a pansexual or sapiosexual. For some reason bisexual just doesn't feel right to me so I don't use that although that is probably what I am now, which is completely new to me. I am in the process of getting divorced/dissolved from my civil union with my exwife and just started a poly triad relationship with a man and a woman. This is my first relationship with a man. I had never been with a man before April of last year so this is all new to me but I'm loving it and learning a ton.
My relationship consists of J, 42 year old male and S, 40 year old female. They have been together for 3 years before we all got together and collectively they have 5 children between 21 and 10 years of age. We also have 3 cats and a dog. I met J originally on an online dating site. He and I hit it off instantly and it wasn't long before I met his gf S and she and I also hit it off although in a completely different way than J and I. It is so nice to be able to be with a man and a woman and get what I need from both of them and be able to give what I can to the two of them. I knew from the getgo that he was poly and seeing other women besides me. I don't have that jealous thing, never have so that does not bother me in the slightest. S is polyfid and with us exclusively. I feel complete when I'm with them. It's so comfortable when I'm there...I miss them like crazy when I leave. It's funny though..this is the first relationship where I feel I can be completely myself and open to be me. I also don't feel trapped like I always did before because I am free to explore others whenever that need comes up. Right now I am happy with the couple I am with but I know if I ever want to explore more..I am free to as long as we all talk about it.
Things are kind of crazy right now with us because we have decided as a group to move in together even though we've only been together for about a month. They are moving into a bigger place due to landlord issues and they asked if I wanted to join them and I accepted. This means me moving from NJ into PA. There are many practical and logistical reasons behind the decision and it just makes sense for us even though we acknowledge that it is a big step for a new relationship. It just feels right to us.
My family has been so negative since I recently came out as poly to them and that I plan on moving into a new home with J and S and their kids. It's funny..they took me being a lesbian at 12 much better than this and I'm an adult and can make my own decisions.They worry because I'm only a year out of my ten year marriage. They all want me to be single and not jump into this. I acknowledged their feelings about it but this just makes sense for me right now so my plan is to proceed with the move. I am currently living with a friend who has a drug problem and who up until recently was 5 months behind on paying his half of the expenses for our place. I also just started a new job that is over an hour away from my current home. My thought is that considering I'm spending most of my time there and want to spend even more there and could if I brought my animals with me, this just makes sense. This move will remove me from a bad situation and will lessen my commute significantly. Also, sharing bills 3 ways rather than two is better for all of us right now. I know this is a big step but I feel ready and feel it will be an adventure and a change that I'm needing right now. The timing is quick but we all get along so well that I honestly don't foresee too many problems. I am not delusional though in thinking that there won't be adjustments that will need to be hashed out when we come together. That's living with roommates though, whether we are all sleeping in the same bed or not.
I'm so glad I found this board and I'm here to get some support, to learn and hopefully to get tips on how to make this all work. We are in it as a team and in it for the long haul and I love them both very much even though this is new. It will be only me talking on this account. I am going to tell J and S about this and if they want their own accounts that will be up to them. I have a feeling this is just going to be my thing though.
I have been lurking for about a week now and thought it was time to introduce myself to the board. My name is Kate and I'm 36 years old and originally from NJ. I have identified as a lesbian for the past 36 years and before April 2014 I was a complete gold star but now have evolved more into a pansexual or sapiosexual. For some reason bisexual just doesn't feel right to me so I don't use that although that is probably what I am now, which is completely new to me. I am in the process of getting divorced/dissolved from my civil union with my exwife and just started a poly triad relationship with a man and a woman. This is my first relationship with a man. I had never been with a man before April of last year so this is all new to me but I'm loving it and learning a ton.
My relationship consists of J, 42 year old male and S, 40 year old female. They have been together for 3 years before we all got together and collectively they have 5 children between 21 and 10 years of age. We also have 3 cats and a dog. I met J originally on an online dating site. He and I hit it off instantly and it wasn't long before I met his gf S and she and I also hit it off although in a completely different way than J and I. It is so nice to be able to be with a man and a woman and get what I need from both of them and be able to give what I can to the two of them. I knew from the getgo that he was poly and seeing other women besides me. I don't have that jealous thing, never have so that does not bother me in the slightest. S is polyfid and with us exclusively. I feel complete when I'm with them. It's so comfortable when I'm there...I miss them like crazy when I leave. It's funny though..this is the first relationship where I feel I can be completely myself and open to be me. I also don't feel trapped like I always did before because I am free to explore others whenever that need comes up. Right now I am happy with the couple I am with but I know if I ever want to explore more..I am free to as long as we all talk about it.
Things are kind of crazy right now with us because we have decided as a group to move in together even though we've only been together for about a month. They are moving into a bigger place due to landlord issues and they asked if I wanted to join them and I accepted. This means me moving from NJ into PA. There are many practical and logistical reasons behind the decision and it just makes sense for us even though we acknowledge that it is a big step for a new relationship. It just feels right to us.
My family has been so negative since I recently came out as poly to them and that I plan on moving into a new home with J and S and their kids. It's funny..they took me being a lesbian at 12 much better than this and I'm an adult and can make my own decisions.They worry because I'm only a year out of my ten year marriage. They all want me to be single and not jump into this. I acknowledged their feelings about it but this just makes sense for me right now so my plan is to proceed with the move. I am currently living with a friend who has a drug problem and who up until recently was 5 months behind on paying his half of the expenses for our place. I also just started a new job that is over an hour away from my current home. My thought is that considering I'm spending most of my time there and want to spend even more there and could if I brought my animals with me, this just makes sense. This move will remove me from a bad situation and will lessen my commute significantly. Also, sharing bills 3 ways rather than two is better for all of us right now. I know this is a big step but I feel ready and feel it will be an adventure and a change that I'm needing right now. The timing is quick but we all get along so well that I honestly don't foresee too many problems. I am not delusional though in thinking that there won't be adjustments that will need to be hashed out when we come together. That's living with roommates though, whether we are all sleeping in the same bed or not.
I'm so glad I found this board and I'm here to get some support, to learn and hopefully to get tips on how to make this all work. We are in it as a team and in it for the long haul and I love them both very much even though this is new. It will be only me talking on this account. I am going to tell J and S about this and if they want their own accounts that will be up to them. I have a feeling this is just going to be my thing though.
