New, want it to work, but struggling at times

Well, I have been home for a couple days and she is still acting very nice. She says she did some soul searching and really appreciates me. Don't know what that means in terms of day to day and in terms of Trent. But for this weekend, I will take the nice treatment. I am not sure how sincere it is, so I will have to start asking some questions soon. My guess is that she is going to try and be super nice to me while I am home and then focus on Trent while I am away.

Taking it slow for now. Hope you are all well.
 
We had a quick conversation, and it appears that she (with help from her counselor) realized that she was looking at this all wrong and taking it too fast. She now says that Trent isn't the kind of guy to run off into the sunset with. So she is putting that into perspective and recognizing the importance ignite relationship. So it's kind of back to square one, where her time with Trent is more about having fun and less about trying so hard to have a relationship. She needs time to find her true happiness and does not see Trent as her long-term happiness. So they will have fun for now. I do see the risk of having the continued relationship between them evolve. But I am living day by day, and this isn't horrible news.
 
Glad to see that the therapy seems to be helping her and that you are taking it one day at a time.
 
Last edited:
Big fight today and she threatened separation. And the threats are getting very old. I am thinking it's finally time to separate.

I can't take the game playing any more.
 
:( I am sorry to hear that RC. Do what is best for you and the kids. It's not good for them to be around all of the fighting and negativity. I hope that you can make this as easy as possible for them and that you can heal. Keep coming here and posting. It is helping me and I am not going through nearly what you are right now. *hugs*
 
That's not cool. She can't say she wants you two to work on things and keep threatening to call it off. That's not being sincere. I'm sorry this is happening to you.
 
Thanks for the replies. It breaks my fucking heart to get to this point. But the threats and the double standard are just too much. I was texting with a woman (about my sadness) and I got that thrown in my face! While she is actively in a relationship with another guy. How is that even close to fair? Our problems go deeper than the other guy. He is a big part of it. But she is fundamentally unhappy. I think the separation will help her think through what she wants and will help me understand what I need to do, as well.
 
I wish you luck in this. Maybe she threatens you because she doesn't think that you will follow through. I think that, if you do follow through, she will realize what she has done and come to her senses. If she doesn't, it will be her loss. You sound like a great guy, excellent father and a more than adequate provider. *hugs*
 
I am really sorry for you. Wishing you all the best. ((hugs))
 
I have never felt so sad. Thanks for all the kind words. Feel like my life is falling apart. I am putting all my focus on my kids. This is the worst feeling.
 
RC, I feel for you. I wish that you didn't have to go through this. Keep concentrating on those kids. Either she will come to her senses or she won't. *hugs*
 
That's a shame. That sucks big hairy donkey balls shaved with a rusty razor. (I didn't invent that saying. I copied that from somewhere. I'm not THAT good).
 
I think you're right-- she's just unhappy and needs to figure herself out. Nothing you can do to help her.

Take care of YOU. Don't give in to everything. Protect yourself and your kids.


((( HUGS ))))
 
Hugs RC. I think you honestly have done what you could. I think it is time you focus on yourself and the kids. Because the kids do come first. I'm so sorry that it's come to this. But she honestly doesn't sound happy at all. And the bad thing is, it will hit her later that she gave up a good thing in a man like you.
Chris
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top