Personal Summaries

Nice to meet you

I am new to the Poly-scene...I guess that is how I found myself here in the first place.

I am a divorced mother of two and work with special needs individuals in the Pittsburgh area. I have been involved in a triad-like relationship for around five months as a secondary...some times it is wonderful, and sometimes I want to give up--always I am clumsily stumbling through, trying to find my place in the relationship.

Nice to meet you all.... :)
As I live in a VERY small town about an hour away from Dallas so I'm going to go by Pinky on this forum. Years ago I happened to have screaming, flamingo pink hair when I met a particular friend so she called me Pinky : ) I am going to refer to my husband as The Dude.

I'm 41/f and bi. I am a professional musician and an editor of horror and dark fantasy novels. He is 42, hetero and self-employed

We are completely new to poly and I'm not even sure that it's the right term for us, but polygamous doesn't really fit either because that community says that they don't believe in the wives having sex with each other. And we're not swingers because neither of us wants meaningless sex, we are about relationships.

So yeah.... aw man... I found out that I'm a freaking unicorn hunter. Crap, crap, crap. LOL

This is my/our story: I have always engaged in monogamy whether I was dating a m or a f, and he has always been monogamous. The Dude and I have been married for seven years, back in the fall my best friend, with whom I have a close emotional relationship, starting chasing me. I asked the Dude if he minded if I had sex with her, he told me to go for it. I did... and it was something of a wham-bam encounter because of an erroneous assumption she made (that I *just* found out about).

However, that encounter made my married sex life better despite that I got my heart broken. The Dude, realizing that I am more responsive to him when I've had sex with a woman (and, yeah, he liked hearing about it) took an opportunity a few weeks later when a good friend of ours came to visit and we ended up having a three-some with her.

At that point we started discussing having a girl friend that we could both have a relationship with (having never heard the term "unicorn hunter" before in our lives). We both want a relationship because meaningless sex is just, well... meaningless.

I put up an ad for us on okcupid and we have met someone that wants to date us because what she's tried in the past hasn't worked out very well, and yeah, she's bi. We have chatted with her online and on the phone and are going on a date this coming Saturday (5/26/12). We both like her, she likes us both, and we'll see where it goes.

I have no desire to have a relationship with any other man. Matter of fact, if something were to happen to the Dude, I'm pretty sure I'd never get involved with another man again. And, he has no interest in having a relationship with anyone else that doesn't involve me. For him it's about my happiness, with a bit of voyeurism thrown in.

See my issue with labels? We don't really seem to fit into a category. We are just following our hearts and what feels right for us.
Hey y'all! Brand new to the poly world. I an finalizing a divorce from a very vanilla monogamous marriage of 16 years, yes i have problems admitting when something is over. I tend to beat the dead horse, flip and repeat. LOL. I met my proverbial soul-mate, offered Him my submission, and W/we both knew poly was an interest to us, after a few attempts to find O/our additional love interest. W/we are both now very happy that W/we waited for the right one to come along.Math and my ID will point out that O/our new love is a she. I will keep this only about me as i hope they will each hook up here soon and take a bow. We are currently in the very early stages and have a lot of internal defining to do, so i am very excited to find this treasure chest of information and support. On the basics we are (W- my Master 45/B/M/hetreo), (A-O/our newest joy 48/W/F), and (D-me 48/W/F/Bi) W/we all currently reside in in or around Atl, Ga and our experience in anything plural is limited to encounters only for both women with M/M/F, so W/we are greener than the sky is blue. I enjoy travel, discourse on EVERYTHING, being a mom, outdoor activities.I have been in IT for 20 years and am looking to transition into teaching soon. I have a 20 YO that knows my interests and is wonderfully open and have preschool quads:eek: (Yes, not the 4 wheeled kind either LOL) Between us W/we are primary caretakers of 10 kids, 7 are biracial and 3 are Caucasian. W/we are certain to face many challenges but i believe O/our combined skills and determination are a huge pluses. I REFUSE to follow the path of least resistance if it is not one filled with joy and i wouldn't canoe without an oar, so why live my life like i have no freedom to choose what works best for me? I believe the absolute best things in life require commitment, hard work and usually sacrifice, so I am rolling up my sleeves and ready to plunge in with two of the most amazing, wonderful people i know. How lucky am i? So many live their lives without one true love. It took nearly 50 years of seeking finally paid off! I would like to add that while W/we see the diversity added to O/our sex lives as a def bonus. This is about so much more to U/us I hope W and A will take a bow soon:D.
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Nicci and Nate

Hi everyone,

We are Nate and Nicci (ages 34 and 33) and we are new to posting online and looking online for support but we are not new to the idea of Polyamory. We married in 1998 and starting having children right away. We moved to Nebraska for school and have 6 children living at home ranging in age from 2 to 14. WE KNEW BEFORE WE EVEN GOT MARRIED THAT WE WERE GOING TO BE A DIFFERENT KIND OF FAMILY.

Now that we are almost finished with our degrees and ready to launch our careers, we realized that we are also ready to find our "third". We have always known that we have a lot of love to give and that we were meant to have a LARGE/HUGE family. We know that somewhere out there is a woman that we can fall in love with who will fall in love with us, our entire family, our extended family and we will be with them for life. We are not looking for a fling... we are looking for our fateful perfect match. We are looking for someone to fall in love with on the inside, someone who completes us, and we complete their life at the same time. Obviously someone who wants a large family and of course we are happy to add more children with our new partner.

I could go on and on but what I will tell you is that we do not spend a lot of time online and we are not looking for an online only relationship but we are going to have her in our family very soon one way or another and we felt that joining a forum like this might help us in our journey.

We cannot imagine a more perfect life than sharing our family with her, devoting our lives to making her happy, and we know she is out there waiting for us. Our intention is to have a very equal loving relationship and be open about it in our community, our lives, and even educate others on our type of lifestyle.

We look forward to reading about everyone else and forming a supportive community around us. For this we do see the value in forming online relationships and we are appreciative that forums like these are available to us.

Thanks for reading....

Nate and Nicci
I put up an ad for us on okcupid and we have met someone that wants to date us because what she's tried in the past hasn't worked out very well, and yeah, she's bi. We have chatted with her online and on the phone and are going on a date this coming Saturday (5/26/12). We both like her, she likes us both, and we'll see where it goes.

I was curious on how your date went?:)
Personal Summary by Polylinguist

I am Polylinguist. I am new to polyamory and even newer to this board.

My main problem is that I do not have problems. Not really. I am 61, retired now for over a year. I am happily married, our 30th wedding anniversary is coming up. My wife has absolutely no problem with my newly-found (or professed) interest in polyamory and has even offered to help me look for a girlfriend. We have two boys, both in their twenties, with whom I get on extremely well. They would probably be embarrassed if I actually found a poly partner and told them about it, but then I am not there yet.

I retired last year from a job in Europe. After retirement, I and my wife decided to move to Vancouver BC, where I did my grad studies many years ago. Both our sons moved to BC when they turned 18, so that the family is back together again. I have several old friends here from my student days, and we are making new friends as we move along.

But polyamory, for now, is a theoretical interest. In a way, this is fine - I am a theoretical kind of person. But still, it would be nice if I could acquire some practical experience in the matter. I attend poly events here in Vancouver, now that I know how and where to find them, but I haven't met anyone there yet. I am on OKCupid, through which I have had a few nibbles, but only one concrete date, and that did not lead anywhere either (except that I learned about the poly scene through it, so that it was not a complete waste).

So there you have it. Aside from constantly enlarging my social circles, which I am doing, I am not sure how to advance towards a poly experience. My dating skills are a bit dusty, and I sure can't appeal to women's sympathy by complaining about how my wife does not understand me.

What next? :)
I was curious on how your date went?:)

Well, because of a babysitter falling through, we didn't have a date night. However, we were having a bbq on Sunday before Memorial Day so she and her daughter came over. Probably a strange first face-to-face meeting, but it went really well : )

Hi Everyone!

My name is 'Leo' and my girlfriend, JennaMarie, and I recently joined the site. We are both knew to poly and are interested in the dynamics of poly relationships. I am 36 and she is 26 and we have been together for over a year and a half. We're currently living in Antioch, TN and are searching for a hetero, poly-friendly woman to join us in our quest experimenting with poly. JennaMarie is not bisexual but is interested in the 'sister' relationship that comes with multiple female/single male relationships.
So far, I am really enjoying the site and the plethra of information and stories that are here.

Thank you to the creators of this community for offering a place where people can feel accepted for their differences. :)

From Utah

Hi all,
I am from Utah and new to the forum. I am married to a wonderful woman who has recently fallen in love with a polyamorous man. I was married before and my first wife and I were swingers. In fact my first wife left me for someone we met while swinging. Obviously my past experiences make me feel very insecure with our current situation. I love my wife and I have no doubt that she wants to be with me for the rest of our lives. I want her to be happy and experience everything she wants out of life, but sometimes the ghosts of my past make it hard for me to accept the fact that she loves someone else. When I got divorced I thought I would never get involved in the swinging lifestyle again. I know polyamory is different than swinging, but it still involves sharing my wife's love with someone else, something I thought I'd never do again. I am open-minded and willing to do anything for my wife, so here I am confronting the ghosts of my past with varying levels of success. When I listen to my heart I am okay with it, when I listen to the paranoid voices in my head I'm afraid of losing my wife. Other than my wife I don't really have anyone to talk to about her polyamorous feelings, so I guess I'm here to find people I can talk to about the polyamorous lifestyle. I don't know if I am poly our not, but I guess I'm open to the possibility. Either way I'm glad I found this site, I think it will help me. Thanks!
OKCCouple from OKC

Hello all, brand new to this forum.

Couple from OKC, 33 years old.
He is Matthew, Straight.
She is Heather, Bi.

We have been around the "swinger" community for a few years now, but never really happy with it. We get looked down on by vanilla friends that know for being "swingers." We get looked down on by swingers for wanting lasting relationships and refusing to be bed hoppers. We have had one long term relationship with another couple that ended about a year ago. We have been cautious about it since then, as we want to find the right person, and not just jump back into anything for the sake of being in it. At this point we miss parts of that relationship and are interested in exploring it again.

I will post a longer description in the Dating & Friendship section to include what we are looking for. Nice to meet you all and looking forward to meeting new friends. :)
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I am Vanessa...I am new to this website...42 years a mono relationship, with a few yearly attempts down the swingers road, but that isn't the lifestyle we are looking for. We are both bi-sexual, my partner isn't as forward with that statement as I am. We have lived a mostly, peaceul and serene life for the past 11 binds us together. We both have two daughters from previous relationships who love each other immensely....I feel as if his daughters were born from my heart. We are now looking into polyamory as there is so much we wish to share with at least one other, we are open to a man or woman, but want to feel a common bond of loving another together...not just physically, but emotionally as well. We want to add another dimension to our daily lives, a new memeber to our family, a traveling companion, literally and figuritively! Just beginning this journey, hoping it will prove to be a harmonious, beautiful trip!
Hello everyone. I prefer to be referenced by my username or as Edith. I'm a bisexual woman in my twenties. I am currently in a BDSM poly quad with one male and three females. My partners are all older than me (the closest to me in age is four years older). I have been involved in this relationship for over two years now; it is my first poly relationship. The relationship consists of myself, "Mika," "Agnes" and "Margo."

Mika is my dominant and boyfriend. He is also in similar relationships with Agnes and Margo. He has been with Agnes two-and-a-half years, me for a little over two years, and Margo for a few months now. Agnes, Margo and I consider ourselves to be sisters in our poly family.

Agnes is my first sister. She was originally in a relationship with Mika when I joined as a third member. She and I were also originally together; we formed a triad. For a large portion of the relationship we experienced a lot of conflict. We have been together and broken up twice, along with maintaining different levels of contact over time. There is possible potential for a relationship of some kind again in the future, but it is currently not manifested. Currently we are sisters and close friends.

Margo is the newest member to our family, joining us only a few months ago. She moved from another state to join us. There are still a lot of adjustments going on with her still. She is in relationships with Mika and Agnes. She and I are sisters, close friends and casual sexual partners.

Now and again we, either as a group or individuals, will maintain casual relationships with outside partners. Currently there are none.

Mika, Agnes and Margo all live together. I live separately. I am there a few of days a week. All of us generally hang out together when I am there, but Agnes and I do not stay nights together. She stays with her family while I am with Mika. Margo will split her nights between Agnes and Mika and I.
Hello All!

Hi, I'm scrumptious1969 and am poly curious. I'm a 42 year-old hetero male and live in the southeast, US. My wife and I have been married for 15 years and because of events that have transpired within the last 6-8 months, I have found myself researching what it means to be polyamorous. I look forward to sharing what helped me arrive here and reading about those with similar experiences.
Never ending search

I am Sheila and I am very much a free spirit. I have been in the swinging lifestyle for most of my life as a single woman as well as a couple. Over the years I have had a few semi (seperate households) poly relationships with couples. This type of settng is more to my liking since I am a very affectionant and loving person. My 2 kids are grown and I am a granny of 3 toddlers. So now I am looking for the right couple. I am open to a live in situation with the right couple who are secure and honest. Seems like every couple that I come in contact with have jealousy issues. I am bi for giving and receiving. Ideally I would like to find a couple in the biker lifestyle who wants a live in mate. MLH&R
I am single and poly curious and just started talking to a polyamorous individual about dating. I have a lot of poly friends but still trying to wrap my head around my feelings of having a poly relationship.
Howdy! I'm Nalani, Lani for short, currently residing in Miami, FL. This will be my first real venture out into the actual poly community, although I have explored a bit (much to my disappointment) in my past relationships. Bisexual in nature with an equal preference to either sex.

I'm also an active member of the Pagan community here in South Florida and teach various workshops and facilitate ceremonies for those interested in ceremonial modification (I'm a professional piercer by trade and a student of anthropology with a focus on rites of passage and ritualistic modification).

I just got out of a pretty terrible crash and burn type relationship, so for the time being unattached, however I am platonically seeing a few people, I'm completely open to this lifestyle however I demand that it be approached with respect for everyone involved in a safe and agreeable manner... After doing copious amounts of research I've decided to branch out and give this thing a real go and am looking forward to, if anything at all, the opportunity to learn and grow.

Aside from that I'm an outdoorsy kinda gal, I like camping, traveling, reading (with a voracious appetite), and there's a rather large sweet spot in my heart for writing and dance, poetry and tribal fusion to be exact.

Looking forward to chatting with you all, see ya on the flip side!
New Member


I'm 22 years old, been with my first partner for 6 years, my best friend moved in with us recently and we all discovered we were in love and began a triad polyamorous relationship about a month ago.

The biggest issue in all our lives is figuring out how to come out.
I don't want to be secretive of our relationship and neither do my other two partners.
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Hi my name is Emma. I've been married for almost three years (anniversary is coming up super soon! :)) and have been open/swinger for the last year and poly for the last 5 months or so.
I love to read, jog, watch stupid comedies, sew terribly but love it, crochet occasionally, craft, and be a goof.
I have Chronic Fatigue so I tend to come off a bit ditzy but it's just my brain fog at work. :D
I am a quiet introvert and prefer listening to talking until I really get to know someone but it doesn't mean I'm not interested or interesting!
My husband "D" and I have two cats, though he wishes we had a dog and since one is kinda evil, I don't blame him.
I am straightish (I have kissed women and do find them attractive, but I am generally not interested in them sexually) and my husband is bi.
So yeah, that's me in a nutshell.
Couple looking for a gf for both of us to enjoy, (aren't we all LOL), or at least a gf for the wife. Must be discreet, public job and kids are in the picture. We have had a few relationships that began from Adult Friend Finders. One was a longer couple relationship (both men allowing us women to have our own relationship, but they got to watch). It worked really well for us, but life got us busy and they got busy as well. Its been a few years and honestly, the new show on Showtime Polyamory, got me jealous, so here I am searching again. We are younger 35m and 29f, attractive. Not six pack fit anymore, but very active. Live in Eastern Iowa. We would love to meet and hang out first to make sure all are comfortable!