Poly with no sex?

B

Belladonna

Active member
Have not been on in a while. Life moves fast. Too fast.
A little bit of a back story. I have been open poly for a few years now. Nothing serious just some light fun. Madmaxx decided to to be open also around 6 months ago and it has not gone very well. He has found he is just more mono. So fast forward to a month ago. I met someone and she is great. She asked about him and then asked if she could date both of us. I really like this girl,a lot. So I agreed. Things have been going really great so far, it's been a little over a month. Anyway now to my question. Madmaxx has decided he does not want to have intercourse with anyone other than me, ever. I am his only and he wants to keep it this way.
I do not want to pressure him either way. He has not told her this yet though.
Any experience in this type of triad? Advice?
 
It would be more of a vee not a triad.

Both my husbands are monogamous. It works fine.
 
That's where I get confused. He wants to spend time with her and do things with her just no intercouse. They talk alone and have their own relationship to some extent.
 
I could absolutely have a loving and fulfilling relationship with someone without having sex (full disclosure, I'm on the asexual spectrum). But Madmaxx should probably talk to her about his decision ASAP, so that she knows what he is thinking and can make an informed decision about whether she wants that kind of relationship with him.

If she doesn't want to continue pursuing a relationship with him, there is no reason why you and her cannot continue to have a relationship, in which case it would be a V instead of a triad.
 
Autumleaves-thank you for your response. I am glad to hear that it can work out. I like her a lot and we works so wonderfully as 3 just on a friendship point of view. We are supposed to go on a trip next month so I know he will be talking to her very very soon.
 
He could just view her as a friend.

Men and women can be friends. There doesn't need a label.
 
Just penis vagina. Other stuff he is ok with.
 
Hi Belladonna,

I certainly think that type of situation can work, it just needs your new partner's consent. Lots of sexual (and nonsexual) things can be done besides intercourse. Ultimately that is for him and her to work out between them. Perhaps they will be able to agree to some kind of sexual relationship, or perhaps not and that's okay too.

Keep us posted okay?
Sincerely,
Kevin T.
 
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