Pregnant and new to poly! Help!!!

I am sorry he turned out to be a lying cheater! People can be so gross.

May I ask why you didnt know he couldnt feel arousal or maintain an erection with a condom on? You didn't use condoms with him in the first place? Didn't he use them when you went to your swinger parties before pregnancy?

Get tested for STDs. If you were at the beginning of pregnancy, get tested again. Diseases can take 6 mos to show up.

I'd wager a guess he was cheating on you with more than one woman. Yes, this was cheating, not polyamory.
 
Response to Magdyln

Hi Magdyln,

To respond to your question, it was the first time in a year and a half that he mentioned this "condition" of being insensitive without condoms to me. Which leads me to believe his story is bullshit and he's just a gross human being. We got tested in the beginning and never used condoms together. I was also tested when I was first pregnant, so yes, getting tested by my midwife is my priority today - considering the coward has yet to put it on his to-do list still 3 weeks later.

And as I may have mentioned in my first posting, we were soooo new to being open, that this was his first gf. We hadn't actually been to swinger parties, poly events or much of anything. We were very newb to everything, and had only casually played with others in the very beginning with eachother's approval (kissing, petting).

I agree with you he was most likely with others, or at least, trying to be. After meeting with the other woman last night for a heart to heart, she was deeply dismayed to find out he had lied to her as well on many occasions about my approval on the level of their intimacy. She also apologized for not being more prying by asking for more details, and even using protection.

All in all....I've come to my senses...What kind of man even wants to start being poly while his partner is pregnant is beyond me. One that is a coward is the only answer I can now think of, and he has lost me in his life forever.

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I am sorry he turned out to be a lying cheater! People can be so gross.

May I ask why you didnt know he couldnt feel arousal or maintain an erection with a condom on? You didn't use condoms with him in the first place? Didn't he use them when you went to your swinger parties before pregnancy?

Get tested for STDs. If you were at the beginning of pregnancy, get tested again. Diseases can take 6 mos to show up.

I'd wager a guess he was cheating on you with more than one woman. Yes, this was cheating, not polyamory.
 
A coward, or perhaps a narcissist/sociopath/psychopath. I was taken advantage of by a narcissist, for a couple years, under cover of "polyamory." Finally saw through his professions of "love" to see what a soulless monster he actually was.
 
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