Really, I'm not a prude.
- Thread starter TLynnP
- Start date
A tantra course did a lot of good for me, more than any book ever could, but I'm slightly reluctant to recommend because a lot of things can hide under the name "tantra" and also different people prefer different approaches. In my case it was roughly 15 evenings (I prefer that over taking a weekend or an intensive week as it's often organized) in a group, where the meeting usually involved some quick dance and communication exercises to get relaxed and tuned in with the group, some meditation/energy work from various traditions, and some conscious erotics such as touch, nudity, rituals. (The level of involvement is voluntary, participants are tought and encouraged to watch their boundaries.) Overall it has helped me reflect and taught me to use sexuality as a tool for self-development and spirituality if desired.
Meeting the bdsm community also did well for me.
I'm still not perfect (especially when it comes to actually asking someone attractive to do stuff), but my views on sexuality have shifted drastically.
So whatever your prefered style is I encourage you to go out and actually meet sex-positive people, once you're ready. There's nothing like that.
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FallenAngelina
Well-known member
Amy Jo Goddard regularly offers online workshops for women who are looking to embrace and expand their sexuality. She has lots on youtube, as well. She's one of the best sexual empowerment coaches in the world today.
opalescent
Active member
I suggest Dan Savage’s podcast, Savage Love. The shorter episodes, about 45 minutes, are free. It doesn’t matter which ones you listen to, just listen to which ones interest you. You will learn quickly about a lot of different sex and relationship topics. I also find Savage’s ethics match up well with my own (except I find he’s a little too couple-centric). Your mileage may vary but at least you can consider your own ethics while listening.
Also read Emily Nagoski’s Come as You Are. https://www.amazon.com/Come-You-Are-Surprising-Transform/dp/1476762090. It’s available at libraries, in various formats. ‘Come As You Are’ is the best single book on sexual desire written so far, in my opinion. It is focused on cis women but I suspect the insights in the book likely apply to cis men, and trans or non-binary people.
My personal advice is let what gives you pleasure guide you. This may seem obvious but pleasure can be often overshadowed by fear, guilt or shame. If you like it - even if it seems kinda out there or odd - and you are not damaging yourself or others, it’s good.
Best of luck!
Also read Emily Nagoski’s Come as You Are. https://www.amazon.com/Come-You-Are-Surprising-Transform/dp/1476762090. It’s available at libraries, in various formats. ‘Come As You Are’ is the best single book on sexual desire written so far, in my opinion. It is focused on cis women but I suspect the insights in the book likely apply to cis men, and trans or non-binary people.
My personal advice is let what gives you pleasure guide you. This may seem obvious but pleasure can be often overshadowed by fear, guilt or shame. If you like it - even if it seems kinda out there or odd - and you are not damaging yourself or others, it’s good.
Best of luck!
vinsanity0
Active member
Practice makes perfect.