Really struggling with a turbulent homecoming

He is love bombing his OSO. Once you leave him he will eventually stop idealising her, and he won't be able to triangulate the two of you. She will become boring when he has more time for her. Then he will devalue her, just as he has devalued you.

He is gaslighting you. I love you, I love you not, and so many other things.

He is using you. Others have mentioned meal ticket, babysitting, housemaid. I throw in SEX. He gets sex from you when he's not with his gf.

You are having to try to explain basic human emotions and concepts to him and all you get back is word salad.

It's all about him. He can't even see your pain, except to enjoy mocking it.

All of these behaviors add up to a certain diagnosis. But I will not say the word. I will leave that to your therapist. I'll just go with GG's term King Baby.
 
And it's fine to take time away from this board and from the internet and from this whole problem. It's very tiring. Take time to eat, sleep, exercise, do a favorite hobby, take your kid on an engrossing adventure (something you'll like just as much as he will), get a massage, or a pedicure, go to the thrift store (charity shop) and buy a few items of new clothing, whatever it takes to center yourself. Do nice things FOR YOURSELF. You deserve it. Not to "make yourself a better person," or to "work on yourself," or to "look prettier" to be more pleasing to others. Just for your own pleasure and health.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top