Smelling the flowers
- Thread starter Petunia
- Start date
It's a blustery, cold day here. The predicted high is set at 68F. I work downtown on an isthmus and if it's somewhat windy elsewhere, it's very windy between the lakes on the isthmus. As I was walking from my parking garage to my office building a gust of wind toppled a plastic distribution rack, spilling a free publication. A young (black) man that was passing by quickly stepped on the newspapers to hold them in place. Once he got the case upright he bent to pick up the newspapers and the wind caught the case again. I shouted to him that it was going to hit him, so he quickly abandoned the newspapers and grabbed the case before it hit him on the head. I stepped over and gave him an assist with the case, tipping it on its back and then together we loaded it. Two thirty-something (white) men stood three feet away and couldn't be bothered. People malign young people, and especially young black men so unfairly. This young man made my day because he stepped up and did the right thing.
I hesitated to write this, as I don't want personal accolades. I don't consider myself a saint and I don't want to come across sanctimonious. I wrote this, because I hope acknowledging real examples rather than accepting stereotypes can help reset the filter we view both young people and people of color. People are people. And I loved this young man for stepping up and doing the right thing. #dotherightthing #carefortheplanet #bettertogether
I hesitated to write this, as I don't want personal accolades. I don't consider myself a saint and I don't want to come across sanctimonious. I wrote this, because I hope acknowledging real examples rather than accepting stereotypes can help reset the filter we view both young people and people of color. People are people. And I loved this young man for stepping up and doing the right thing. #dotherightthing #carefortheplanet #bettertogether
I'm so annoyed, pissed, peeved, you name it, I'm there. My sister called yesterday to talk about the Sip & See baby shower, so I figured I should get an event put together so people know the details and can make plans. Before inviting people, I sent another message to my son, his ex-gf, and her mother to make sure the first weekend in October will work for them.
His ex-gf now says that October 7th will be too soon for her to travel after Avery's birth.
"I'm sorry but I'm not going to be ready to travel"
So, I asked her when she thought she be up to it. Answer: Thanksgiving or Christmas.
I told her that road conditions can be questionable later in the fall in Northern climates.
Good grief, it's not like she's having a c-section. I had Josh, and two days later on Mother's Day we brought him home from the hospital and went to the lake for a picnic. I was sitting cross-legged on my hospital bed just a few hours after Megan was born!
There is no chance that my family will travel to my house (3+ hours) around either holiday. Many of them will be hunting during the Wisconsin gun season over Thanksgiving, and it's way too hectic around Christmas for them to consider it. Plus, Bond's sister and family will be visiting over Christmas.
I'm going to let it be for a day and then revisit it. Hopefully she'll be in a more favorable mood. I was tempted to say that maybe Josh would need to come with the baby and leave her behind.
His ex-gf now says that October 7th will be too soon for her to travel after Avery's birth.
"I'm sorry but I'm not going to be ready to travel"
So, I asked her when she thought she be up to it. Answer: Thanksgiving or Christmas.
I told her that road conditions can be questionable later in the fall in Northern climates.
Good grief, it's not like she's having a c-section. I had Josh, and two days later on Mother's Day we brought him home from the hospital and went to the lake for a picnic. I was sitting cross-legged on my hospital bed just a few hours after Megan was born!
There is no chance that my family will travel to my house (3+ hours) around either holiday. Many of them will be hunting during the Wisconsin gun season over Thanksgiving, and it's way too hectic around Christmas for them to consider it. Plus, Bond's sister and family will be visiting over Christmas.
I'm going to let it be for a day and then revisit it. Hopefully she'll be in a more favorable mood. I was tempted to say that maybe Josh would need to come with the baby and leave her behind.
I gave it another try to see if I can convince my son's ex-gf to come to Wisconsin in October.
[gf's name], I wanted to check in to make sure you didn't mistakenly think I meant for you to come in September, just one week following Avery's arrival. I am proposing five weeks after. We'll do our absolute best to make sure you have a lovely visit.
In addition to having family meet you and get to see Avery for the first time, we would like to hold a baby shower for Josh. He will be needing things for Avery, and I can't afford to supply all of these items on my own. There is very little chance that my family would travel to Madison (3+ hours one way for most of them) over Thanksgiving or Christmas. Most of Josh's family and friends deer hunt over the Thanksgiving holiday, and travel can be questionable during Christmas as our roads are often snow or ice covered at that time of year, plus they are simply busy with their individual family traditions. Additionally, it's so many months past Avery's birth that it's too late to host a baby shower.
I hope I can persuade you to come. We'd really love to meet you and have you as a guest in our home.
In addition to having family meet you and get to see Avery for the first time, we would like to hold a baby shower for Josh. He will be needing things for Avery, and I can't afford to supply all of these items on my own. There is very little chance that my family would travel to Madison (3+ hours one way for most of them) over Thanksgiving or Christmas. Most of Josh's family and friends deer hunt over the Thanksgiving holiday, and travel can be questionable during Christmas as our roads are often snow or ice covered at that time of year, plus they are simply busy with their individual family traditions. Additionally, it's so many months past Avery's birth that it's too late to host a baby shower.
I hope I can persuade you to come. We'd really love to meet you and have you as a guest in our home.
My son got back to me that his ex-gf was feeling pressured and he asked me to leave her be. I am gobsmacked that this girl is so uncaring that her decision adversely affects my son and her daughter. We can hardly hold a baby shower months after the baby's arrival. I'm honoring his request to let the matter drop for now. I suspect that she's going to feel differently once she is no longer pregnant and she discovers that her body has bounced back from pregnancy. Life does indeed go on after giving birth.
My son sent me this and asked if it was his sister's boyfriend.
Yep. Sure is.
Pisses me off that she associates with people of this caliber.
Bond and I are doing great. I love that man so much. His older sister, who lives in Italy, sent me the nicest IM on Tuesday.
(It was a pic I took of S2 making flan.)
But, really what I see in that pic is time being dedicated to raising a good human... and I just wanted to say thank you for all you do! I know we have never met, but I see the amount of time and love you dedicate to my brother and nephews! I love you for that!
How sweet is that?!!! I love his family. Fabulous people.
The refrigerator drawer panel saga continues. After months of waiting, the new panel was to be installed today and...it's too big. Seriously folks, can't you measure. At this point I think our best option is to have the Kitchen Idea Center's carpenters make it themselves rather than the cabinet company.
Bond ordered the meat grinder so we can make our kitten's food. He placed the order at 4:30 on Wednesday and it was delivered to our door 25 hours later! Holy smokes, fast! The biggest shocker was that it was shipped from a town 20 miles away (the one I lived in for 13 years and raised my kids in). It's such a small world sometimes. I researched raw diets for cats which led me to catnutrition.org. The site owner advises buying a specific meat grinder, which we did, and amazingly it's sourced from our backyard practically. I ordered the supplements and they arrived last week. I'm hoping to buy the meat this weekend so we can make a batch and have it ready for the kitty's arrival Friday night.
All things litter (litter, litter pan, litter mat, litter sifter) have been ordered and will be arriving between now and next week. Amazon offered rewards for slower shipping and because we have a week before his majesty's arrival I took advantage of the offer. Next up is placing an order with Chewy.com for a climber and a couple of toys.
We're so excited about this kitten!
I want to redo the cat scratcher this weekend. We have carpet remnants and new sisal for it. Maybe we'll get the climbing pole installed this weekend, too.
Here is the inspiration picture:
If we get that done, then we'll need to get the plexiglass installed inside the uplighting trough soffit. (Oh, 80's house!)
It's kind of hard to pick out, but it's on the wall on the right, above the doorway to the dining room. You can see the pine trim along the top edge of it. (BTW, this picture is from the realty listing and the furniture and furnishings are those of the previous owners.) We'd place the climber at the left end of the soffit.
Oh, I have decided to take all of next week off of work! We're having a bday party for S2 on Wednesday. Thursday Bond's work is taking everyone, including any family that would like to join, to see a movie. The employee's chose Dunkirk and it's one I've been wanting to see. Pretty jazzed. That evening his company is hosting their first ever employee social.
Both B and I are accompanying Bond. Sounds like fun!
My son sent me this and asked if it was his sister's boyfriend.
Press Release - August 8, 2017
On Monday, August 7, 2017, the [xx] County Sheriff’s Department served a search warrant at 906 21st St., [xx] and four subjects were taken into custody on various drug charges.
Timothy Morgan, 38 of [xx], on four counts of Delivery of Meth and four counts of Felony Bail Jumping (Morgan has eight previous bail jumping charges).
Shawn Biggart, 56 of [xx], on charges of Possession of Meth.
Ricky Moen, 61 of [xx], on charges of Possession of Meth.
Wendy Raasch, 47 of [xx], on Charges of Possession of Meth
During the search warrant, about four grams of meth were located and all four subjects are currently being held in the [xx] County Jail. Morgan has been a target of the Sheriff’s Department for being a person supplying meth to the area. His last arrest was February 2, 2017, for meth related charges.
Per Chris Fitzgerald, [xx] County Sheriff
On Monday, August 7, 2017, the [xx] County Sheriff’s Department served a search warrant at 906 21st St., [xx] and four subjects were taken into custody on various drug charges.
Timothy Morgan, 38 of [xx], on four counts of Delivery of Meth and four counts of Felony Bail Jumping (Morgan has eight previous bail jumping charges).
Shawn Biggart, 56 of [xx], on charges of Possession of Meth.
Ricky Moen, 61 of [xx], on charges of Possession of Meth.
Wendy Raasch, 47 of [xx], on Charges of Possession of Meth
During the search warrant, about four grams of meth were located and all four subjects are currently being held in the [xx] County Jail. Morgan has been a target of the Sheriff’s Department for being a person supplying meth to the area. His last arrest was February 2, 2017, for meth related charges.
Per Chris Fitzgerald, [xx] County Sheriff
Yep. Sure is.
Pisses me off that she associates with people of this caliber. Bond and I are doing great. I love that man so much. His older sister, who lives in Italy, sent me the nicest IM on Tuesday.
Hi! Just wanted to say that I love the flan pic in the new kitchen!
(It was a pic I took of S2 making flan.)
Awww, thanks! We're getting a lot of enjoyment out of the kitchen and we're especially happy when the kids experiment with cooking.
But, really what I see in that pic is time being dedicated to raising a good human... and I just wanted to say thank you for all you do! I know we have never met, but I see the amount of time and love you dedicate to my brother and nephews! I love you for that!
How sweet is that?!!! I love his family. Fabulous people.
The refrigerator drawer panel saga continues. After months of waiting, the new panel was to be installed today and...it's too big. Seriously folks, can't you measure. At this point I think our best option is to have the Kitchen Idea Center's carpenters make it themselves rather than the cabinet company.
Bond ordered the meat grinder so we can make our kitten's food. He placed the order at 4:30 on Wednesday and it was delivered to our door 25 hours later! Holy smokes, fast! The biggest shocker was that it was shipped from a town 20 miles away (the one I lived in for 13 years and raised my kids in). It's such a small world sometimes. I researched raw diets for cats which led me to catnutrition.org. The site owner advises buying a specific meat grinder, which we did, and amazingly it's sourced from our backyard practically. I ordered the supplements and they arrived last week. I'm hoping to buy the meat this weekend so we can make a batch and have it ready for the kitty's arrival Friday night.
All things litter (litter, litter pan, litter mat, litter sifter) have been ordered and will be arriving between now and next week. Amazon offered rewards for slower shipping and because we have a week before his majesty's arrival I took advantage of the offer. Next up is placing an order with Chewy.com for a climber and a couple of toys.
We're so excited about this kitten!
I want to redo the cat scratcher this weekend. We have carpet remnants and new sisal for it. Maybe we'll get the climbing pole installed this weekend, too.
Here is the inspiration picture:
If we get that done, then we'll need to get the plexiglass installed inside the uplighting trough soffit. (Oh, 80's house!)
It's kind of hard to pick out, but it's on the wall on the right, above the doorway to the dining room. You can see the pine trim along the top edge of it. (BTW, this picture is from the realty listing and the furniture and furnishings are those of the previous owners.) We'd place the climber at the left end of the soffit.
Oh, I have decided to take all of next week off of work! We're having a bday party for S2 on Wednesday. Thursday Bond's work is taking everyone, including any family that would like to join, to see a movie. The employee's chose Dunkirk and it's one I've been wanting to see. Pretty jazzed. That evening his company is hosting their first ever employee social.
We’ve put together [company's] first official Meet & Greet Happy Hour! Would you or your Significant Other like to meet more people from [company] and/or their significant others? If you answered yes…you better come!
When: Thursday, August 17th from 5:00 to 7:00 pm – Drinks and appetizers will be served
Where: [xx] Restaurant and Pub Patio
When: Thursday, August 17th from 5:00 to 7:00 pm – Drinks and appetizers will be served
Where: [xx] Restaurant and Pub Patio
Both B and I are accompanying Bond. Sounds like fun!
Eh, it's a 1 in 3 chance these days - doctors have gotten seriously scalpel happy. Especially with an induction.
::she says somewhat bitterly while looking at the scar she shouldn't have::
I understand that it's unfortunately quite common, especially in the US.
AlwaysGrowing
Well-known member
Where does baby momma live? I personally wouldn't commit to traveling more than an hour away for the first 3 months. After having my daughter, I was really struggling to breastfeed so balancing a cranky, hungry baby with an engorged stressed mom in a place I'm not 100% comfortable would not have been possible. I cried enough in the comfort of my own home. While I physically recovered in no time, I was emotionally a wreck. The first few months of parenthood are brutal for some. Count yourself lucky that you felt so great so soon.
I've dropped off of here for nearly a month. One reason was pure irritation and the other was life became too busy.
We got our kitty on the 18th. We named him Maximilian Augustus I, aka Max. He's been a lot of fun and we are enamoured with him. He sleeps with Bond and me, and is usually between our pillows with his back against the headboard, or he's in my cubby/bookshelf. I can't phantom why he choses to sleep on a hard surface, but evidently he likes that it's enclosed on three sides. He was intimidated by the size of the house initially, but day by day he ventured into new rooms and by the next day he'd act like he owned that room.
Max climbed on the stool I had out while doing a water change in the tank. He was super excited about the fishies and snails.
My new granddaughter, Avery. Born August 25, 2017. 6 lbs 12 oz. 18"
She and momma are doing very well.
As soon as I got the news she was in labor I left work and rushed home for clothes and such and was on the road within two hours. She was born before I even got out of Wisconsin, so I missed her birth, but I got to spend quite a few hours gazing at her.
My son was super happy and thankful that I came.
Franki has been sick with an upper respitory infection. She had a CT scan last Thursday and started a course of antibiotics, but they aren't doing the trick. I'm getting pretty worried.
Saturday we had a cookout with a dozen friends and their kids at our house. One of our guests left her 5 year old with us while she ran to the airport and she was barely out the door before the little girl took a nosedive on the stairs and hit her forehead on the armoire on the landing. Holy moly, she got a huge goose egg on her forehead that had a crisp red line and a blue zone on one side. Yikes. We were checking her pupils for even dilation it was so bad. Scary.
Sunday we barely did anything. We bought a "chicken chopper", aka, a cleaver, for cutting chicken leg quarters, and took the boys out for dinner, but nothing much else happened. Yesterday was another lazy day. We dropped the boys off at their mother's around noon. The only thing we accomplished after that was making a batch of raw kitty food for Max.
I'm hitting my afternoon malaise. It seems like every workday afternoon I hit a lot point where I feel depressed. I dislike having an outside the home job so much. I need to cultivate a better attitude.
Oh, my youngest is probably deploying today or Thursday for the Hurricane Harvey area.
We got our kitty on the 18th. We named him Maximilian Augustus I, aka Max. He's been a lot of fun and we are enamoured with him. He sleeps with Bond and me, and is usually between our pillows with his back against the headboard, or he's in my cubby/bookshelf. I can't phantom why he choses to sleep on a hard surface, but evidently he likes that it's enclosed on three sides. He was intimidated by the size of the house initially, but day by day he ventured into new rooms and by the next day he'd act like he owned that room.
Max climbed on the stool I had out while doing a water change in the tank. He was super excited about the fishies and snails.
My new granddaughter, Avery. Born August 25, 2017. 6 lbs 12 oz. 18"
She and momma are doing very well.
As soon as I got the news she was in labor I left work and rushed home for clothes and such and was on the road within two hours. She was born before I even got out of Wisconsin, so I missed her birth, but I got to spend quite a few hours gazing at her.
My son was super happy and thankful that I came.
Franki has been sick with an upper respitory infection. She had a CT scan last Thursday and started a course of antibiotics, but they aren't doing the trick. I'm getting pretty worried.
Saturday we had a cookout with a dozen friends and their kids at our house. One of our guests left her 5 year old with us while she ran to the airport and she was barely out the door before the little girl took a nosedive on the stairs and hit her forehead on the armoire on the landing. Holy moly, she got a huge goose egg on her forehead that had a crisp red line and a blue zone on one side. Yikes. We were checking her pupils for even dilation it was so bad. Scary.
Sunday we barely did anything. We bought a "chicken chopper", aka, a cleaver, for cutting chicken leg quarters, and took the boys out for dinner, but nothing much else happened. Yesterday was another lazy day. We dropped the boys off at their mother's around noon. The only thing we accomplished after that was making a batch of raw kitty food for Max.
I'm hitting my afternoon malaise. It seems like every workday afternoon I hit a lot point where I feel depressed. I dislike having an outside the home job so much. I need to cultivate a better attitude.
Oh, my youngest is probably deploying today or Thursday for the Hurricane Harvey area.
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I can't even begin to keep up on this blog with all of the things happening in my life, which I'm pretty sure is the case for most people.
Thoughts:
My job is causing me so much anxiety. Yesterday I almost broke down and sent Bond a message saying I couldn't do it anymore. I would love a way out of my career. My brain can't do it anymore. Like, I cannot get myself to concentrate or figure out what I need to do. I tell him and I tell Twitch, but they are unbelieving and I feel trapped. Trapped by debt. Trapped by the needs of my children. My adult children. They rely on me so much and I can't get my debt paid off, because I am always helping them.
My daughter spent the weekend in jail due to missing a court date for unpaid child support. She got out Monday afternoon and she called me to come get her. I was relieved to hear from her, as the police officer who picked her up had called me to let me know and then said she would be able to call me once they transported her to the county she was divorced in and where she has to go for court. I didn't hear from her all weekend and by Monday I was anxiety ridden. I had to mail mystery snails out, so initially I planned on going into work late, but the stress of getting the snails packaged, invoices sent to cover shipping, stress about work, and stress over her being in jail and me not hearing from her had me as close to a panic attack as I've ever been in my life. I canceled work and was just trying to keep myself busy and productive at home. So, when the call came in I was relieved. I picked her up and suggested that she stay with me until Monday, but she flipped into panic mode and said she had to see her dog. And she thought she had a job, etc. In the end her cousin's friend met me part way and she got to go home. I didn't get home until 11 pm that night after driving for 6 hours.
She goes to court on Monday, the 18th, and I suspect they'll incarcerate her again. Having someone in jail is so expensive. I am in dread of how much this may cost me, and I am trying to draw a line in the sand and say, no, but it's hard.
On the drive I lost track of the number of times she said she didn't want to live and how her cousin should have let her die. She'd get back into more positive thinking and then nosedive again. One of the things that she was dealing with was coming close to getting a tiny house from someone she knows and then seeing it slip away. She desperately wants something of her own. Something stable and something she can afford. It's ridiculously cheap at $1,750. They said that if she put $500 down that she could get it. (Now they are saying they need half before she can move it.) I wrestled with myself over wanting to make this happen for her while also strongly not wanting to go more into debt. In the end, I told her that I could do the down payment ($500), if she could manage the rest. She needs something to keep her here, alive. I advised her to negotiate a low monthly amount, like $100 or $125, so she can swing everything. I guess there are several campgrounds there that will allow these in their campgrounds.
It's so hard to walk the line of helping and not enabling, and I'm not sure I'm not enabling. It sucks. It's scary and sad to have a child that is so close to the gutter.
My youngest son didn't end up deploying, so now he can continue with college this semester and graduate in December. Six months after graduation he will be off my cell phone plan, which should save me a chunk of change.
My middle child is getting hired on as a full time employee in two weeks and will get a $2/hr raise. Yay! I had to send him $200 yesterday to help him get by. I hope we are coming to an end of me having to help him make ends meet. Things could be on an upswing before too long. I'm slightly optimistic. It would be nice to feel like I can breathe again.
There is a bill going through the Assembly that would legalize cannabis in Wisconsin. If it makes it through (not too optimistic), then I am opening a dispensary so quick it'll make your head spin. I may not know a lot about marijuana, but I do know how to run a business. And that would get me out of IT and into something I can wrap my head around.
Thoughts:
My job is causing me so much anxiety. Yesterday I almost broke down and sent Bond a message saying I couldn't do it anymore. I would love a way out of my career. My brain can't do it anymore. Like, I cannot get myself to concentrate or figure out what I need to do. I tell him and I tell Twitch, but they are unbelieving and I feel trapped. Trapped by debt. Trapped by the needs of my children. My adult children. They rely on me so much and I can't get my debt paid off, because I am always helping them.
My daughter spent the weekend in jail due to missing a court date for unpaid child support. She got out Monday afternoon and she called me to come get her. I was relieved to hear from her, as the police officer who picked her up had called me to let me know and then said she would be able to call me once they transported her to the county she was divorced in and where she has to go for court. I didn't hear from her all weekend and by Monday I was anxiety ridden. I had to mail mystery snails out, so initially I planned on going into work late, but the stress of getting the snails packaged, invoices sent to cover shipping, stress about work, and stress over her being in jail and me not hearing from her had me as close to a panic attack as I've ever been in my life. I canceled work and was just trying to keep myself busy and productive at home. So, when the call came in I was relieved. I picked her up and suggested that she stay with me until Monday, but she flipped into panic mode and said she had to see her dog. And she thought she had a job, etc. In the end her cousin's friend met me part way and she got to go home. I didn't get home until 11 pm that night after driving for 6 hours.
She goes to court on Monday, the 18th, and I suspect they'll incarcerate her again. Having someone in jail is so expensive. I am in dread of how much this may cost me, and I am trying to draw a line in the sand and say, no, but it's hard.
On the drive I lost track of the number of times she said she didn't want to live and how her cousin should have let her die. She'd get back into more positive thinking and then nosedive again. One of the things that she was dealing with was coming close to getting a tiny house from someone she knows and then seeing it slip away. She desperately wants something of her own. Something stable and something she can afford. It's ridiculously cheap at $1,750. They said that if she put $500 down that she could get it. (Now they are saying they need half before she can move it.) I wrestled with myself over wanting to make this happen for her while also strongly not wanting to go more into debt. In the end, I told her that I could do the down payment ($500), if she could manage the rest. She needs something to keep her here, alive. I advised her to negotiate a low monthly amount, like $100 or $125, so she can swing everything. I guess there are several campgrounds there that will allow these in their campgrounds.
It's so hard to walk the line of helping and not enabling, and I'm not sure I'm not enabling. It sucks. It's scary and sad to have a child that is so close to the gutter.
My youngest son didn't end up deploying, so now he can continue with college this semester and graduate in December. Six months after graduation he will be off my cell phone plan, which should save me a chunk of change.
My middle child is getting hired on as a full time employee in two weeks and will get a $2/hr raise. Yay! I had to send him $200 yesterday to help him get by. I hope we are coming to an end of me having to help him make ends meet. Things could be on an upswing before too long. I'm slightly optimistic. It would be nice to feel like I can breathe again.
There is a bill going through the Assembly that would legalize cannabis in Wisconsin. If it makes it through (not too optimistic), then I am opening a dispensary so quick it'll make your head spin. I may not know a lot about marijuana, but I do know how to run a business. And that would get me out of IT and into something I can wrap my head around.
I met Ruby and B at Colectivo, a coffee house, last night to get the 411 on Ruby so I can put together a Go Fund Me for her. She's hoping to go back to school, but has a bill to pay at a technical college before they will release her transcripts. It's a shame she even has the bill. It was all a lack of communication and red tape with working with the Department of Vocational Rehab (DVR) to take some courses that got too tangled to straighten out, so she ended up stuck with the bill.
I talked to my son about whether or not he thought he'd be able to come up north with the baby for the shower/sip and see. He talked to Mary Beth and her stepmom and basically the stepmom said, not until after the first of the year. I told my family that the shower was canceled, but it sounds like they'd like to get together regardless. I may push it off until November so that Bond is past crunch. If they come the first week of October he'll be working almost around the clock and they may think he's avoiding them. It may be possible to have new carpet in the basement if we wait until November, too.
I was pretty certain that Mary Beth was just being stubborn about coming, and as I'm guilty of doing, I took it personal and felt that she doesn't want to come because she dislikes me. Josh said that's not it at all. That it's her stepmom. She makes all the decisions.
Mary Beth went back to work two weeks after Avery was born. Poor girl. She is living with her father and stepmother and they are having money problems, so they told her she has to pay $150/week in rent to live with them. Seems a better idea would be for the stepmom to get a job! What controlling people!
I talked to my son about whether or not he thought he'd be able to come up north with the baby for the shower/sip and see. He talked to Mary Beth and her stepmom and basically the stepmom said, not until after the first of the year. I told my family that the shower was canceled, but it sounds like they'd like to get together regardless. I may push it off until November so that Bond is past crunch. If they come the first week of October he'll be working almost around the clock and they may think he's avoiding them. It may be possible to have new carpet in the basement if we wait until November, too.
I was pretty certain that Mary Beth was just being stubborn about coming, and as I'm guilty of doing, I took it personal and felt that she doesn't want to come because she dislikes me. Josh said that's not it at all. That it's her stepmom. She makes all the decisions.
Mary Beth went back to work two weeks after Avery was born. Poor girl. She is living with her father and stepmother and they are having money problems, so they told her she has to pay $150/week in rent to live with them. Seems a better idea would be for the stepmom to get a job! What controlling people!
I' unsure of the details, but my daughter wasn't sent to jail. From the little she told me via text, she may have gotten a job and that saved her. I'm not 100% sure. It's either that or she is close to getting one. I sent her money to get down to southern Wisconsin to the courthouse and again to get her home - $40 each way. I can't believe how much her SUV takes - and I likely funded her cigarettes. Then on her way home she asked for another $20 so "we can get something to eat." Um, who is this "we"? Turns out a friend of hers had to be in court for the same thing - child support, so he rode with her. What a moocher. I asked her why it was that I was being asked to cover his food? That he should be asking his family and friends and not me. She said his mother didn't come through. I told her that she has to get a job and keep it, because it is not sustainable for me to fund her life. I'm drowning in debt. I am so tired of this.
Josh needed to be in Akron, OH Monday for divorce court. It's an 8 hour drive. I sent him money via Venmo, but his bank hadn't released the funds, so I had to send him money via Western Union. I asked my brother if he'd get him a free motel room with his loyalty points, but that fell through because Josh needed my brother's credit card when he went to check in. So, I made arrangements to rent a room for him rather than have him sleeping in his truck at a wayside. And I managed to get myself double charged due to stupidity on my end. Ugh. The good news is Josh thinks he's turned a corner with his employment and that he'll be able to cover his expenses from here on out. He will be getting hired on fulltime, no more temp agency, and will get a raise.
We've had a flu virus going through our house since last Thursday. Bond and Z started it, and S3 came down with it on the weekend, and S2 and I got the ick yesterday. Thankfully it's fairly fast moving and recovery is quick.
By mid afternoon I started to feel better and thought I was up to painting two nightstands for the guest bedroom, so I took myself off to Menard's for the paint. Once I was out and about I found that I had overestimated how good I was feeling. But after a brief rest when I got home I was ready to tackle it. I'm about 1/3 of the way finished.
I want the guest bedroom to be a sanctuary. It's tucked away from the hubbub of the house and is restful. Our house is nicknamed The Beach, so I am going for a beach feel. I ordered this comforter set from Overstock, and I truly love it. I'm using the picture on Overstock as my inspiration photo for decorative elements for the room. I'm painting the nightstands white and I'm tempted to paint the bed, too. The headboard has wood posts with arched wrought iron. There isn't a footboard. I was thinking of reupholstering the box spring in dark gray fabric and painting the rails to match, because I'd really like to ditch the dust ruffle. If not, then maybe make or find a tailored dust ruffle that isn't ruffly. I'm searching for an articulated lamp in gold, or in the right style and I can paint it gold. I'm tossing around the idea of painting the room the lightest sea mist color I can find (maybe something like this) and picking a lighter brown colored carpet. I'd like to score a stuffed armchair for this room, too. It'd be really sweet If I could also find an ottoman. It's such a large room that adding something like that is very doable and would help make the room comfortable.
Josh needed to be in Akron, OH Monday for divorce court. It's an 8 hour drive. I sent him money via Venmo, but his bank hadn't released the funds, so I had to send him money via Western Union. I asked my brother if he'd get him a free motel room with his loyalty points, but that fell through because Josh needed my brother's credit card when he went to check in. So, I made arrangements to rent a room for him rather than have him sleeping in his truck at a wayside. And I managed to get myself double charged due to stupidity on my end. Ugh. The good news is Josh thinks he's turned a corner with his employment and that he'll be able to cover his expenses from here on out. He will be getting hired on fulltime, no more temp agency, and will get a raise.
We've had a flu virus going through our house since last Thursday. Bond and Z started it, and S3 came down with it on the weekend, and S2 and I got the ick yesterday. Thankfully it's fairly fast moving and recovery is quick.
By mid afternoon I started to feel better and thought I was up to painting two nightstands for the guest bedroom, so I took myself off to Menard's for the paint. Once I was out and about I found that I had overestimated how good I was feeling. But after a brief rest when I got home I was ready to tackle it. I'm about 1/3 of the way finished.
I want the guest bedroom to be a sanctuary. It's tucked away from the hubbub of the house and is restful. Our house is nicknamed The Beach, so I am going for a beach feel. I ordered this comforter set from Overstock, and I truly love it. I'm using the picture on Overstock as my inspiration photo for decorative elements for the room. I'm painting the nightstands white and I'm tempted to paint the bed, too. The headboard has wood posts with arched wrought iron. There isn't a footboard. I was thinking of reupholstering the box spring in dark gray fabric and painting the rails to match, because I'd really like to ditch the dust ruffle. If not, then maybe make or find a tailored dust ruffle that isn't ruffly. I'm searching for an articulated lamp in gold, or in the right style and I can paint it gold. I'm tossing around the idea of painting the room the lightest sea mist color I can find (maybe something like this) and picking a lighter brown colored carpet. I'd like to score a stuffed armchair for this room, too. It'd be really sweet If I could also find an ottoman. It's such a large room that adding something like that is very doable and would help make the room comfortable.
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Last night was Triad date night and we had a delicious dinner of stuffed portabella mushrooms and silky smooth cauliflower mash, followed by decadent sex. OMG, it was so good.
I sent Bond and B a message this afternoon saying I was bored and B told me I should leave work and come sit on her face. As if I could leave work. Then she said I should swing by her house tonight on my way home and do it. And by golly, I think that's just what I'm going to do! Bond has to work late as they are shipping this Friday. I have food already prepared in the refrigerator for the boys, so no really urgency to getting home immediately. Woot!
Tomorrow night I'm going to see Franki in her town. Cannot wait! I haven't seen her in days and days. Sunday night we are going to see Margaret Cho. That should be a lot of fun. We're going to dinner ahead of time, too.
I'm a lucky girl!
I sent Bond and B a message this afternoon saying I was bored and B told me I should leave work and come sit on her face. As if I could leave work. Then she said I should swing by her house tonight on my way home and do it. And by golly, I think that's just what I'm going to do!
Bond has to work late as they are shipping this Friday. I have food already prepared in the refrigerator for the boys, so no really urgency to getting home immediately. Woot! Tomorrow night I'm going to see Franki in her town. Cannot wait! I haven't seen her in days and days. Sunday night we are going to see Margaret Cho. That should be a lot of fun. We're going to dinner ahead of time, too.
I'm a lucky girl!
I got a call my daughter as I was walking to my car after work yesterday. Her SUV is having transmission problems and she wanted her car back from her cousin. I had agreed to sell it to him if possible, but it was turning out to not be possible, because it has a lien against it for the back child support Megan owes. Plus she said he has multiple transportation options right now. He needs to license/register a car, but he has that, a truck, and a motorcycle available. I called him, got his voicemail and left a message. Sent a text and got no reply. He called me back around 9:30 and he seemed okay with letting her have the car. I woke to a text message from him that was a bit more grumbly and he wanted me to let Megan know that he had changed the oil yesterday. Considering that he has drove the car for months I don't think I should feel bad about that. I do though, because he's been out of work for months following back surgery.
and she wanted her car back from her cousin. I had agreed to sell it to him if possible, but it was turning out to not be possible, because it has a lien against it for the back child support Megan owes. Plus she said he has multiple transportation options right now. He needs to license/register a car, but he has that, a truck, and a motorcycle available. I called him, got his voicemail and left a message. Sent a text and got no reply. He called me back around 9:30 and he seemed okay with letting her have the car. I woke to a text message from him that was a bit more grumbly and he wanted me to let Megan know that he had changed the oil yesterday. Considering that he has drove the car for months I don't think I should feel bad about that. I do though, because he's been out of work for months following back surgery.
To assuage my guilt over the car I placed an Amazon for my nephew. He'll be getting shampoo and conditioner, a set of cutting mats, and a cast iron skillet. The shampoo and conditioner and cutting mats are meant as replacements for things he thinks Megan has stolen from him. She says he's crazy to think she took them, but maybe this will help. In retribution for the wrongs he feels she has done him, he let people go through her SUV and take anything they wanted. Basically, most of her clothing was stolen, including her underwear! Someone even took a picture of her son out of a picture frame and took the frame. Absolutely cruel. I don't know what all has transpired between these two cousins, but things have definitely gone sideways. I have suspected that my nephew is using drugs, and my daughter will not outright confirm it, but when I told her that I needed to know if I was dealing with an unaltered person, she told me to assume I am not. It's a fucking mess. I should talk to my sister and mother and get their perspectives. Right now I'm afraid these two are burning the family down.
Friday night I stayed up past 12:30am - like an idiot. I told myself I could sleep in the next morning. Ha! I totally forgot about the kitty's schedule. Bond is in crunch time, so he was at work until late into the night. I wasn't sure exactly when he came home and crawled in bed, so when the kitty started pestering us I got up with him. My head ached so bad from lack of sleep and damn it, I hadn't stopped at the grocers the night before for heavy whipping cream for my BPC. Ugh. I ended up sneaking back in the bedroom for passable clothing and then did a grocery store run.
Bond got up when I got back, and we showered, quickly made some BPC, and got out the door with the kitten for his vet appointment at 10 o'clock. I was super impressed with how well he did riding in his carrier. He was perfectly relaxed and curious about things. He weighs 6.7lbs at 15 weeks and 3 days of age. He got two shots which wiped him out the rest of the day.
Saturday night B, Bond, and I went to Grind - a dungeon. You may recall, that we had gone for the first time two weeks ago. B is really loving the space. I'm enjoying seeing people I haven't seen in awhile. B wanted to use one of the tables in the medical room to go down on me, while Bond fucked her from behind. I was kind of reluctant to have sex in public, but hey, I took one for the team. After they both orgasmed, we moved to the main dungeon and she talked me into lying on top of a cage with a thick pad on the top where she resumed her attentions. Bond helped me block out the activity of the room and much to my surprise I actually came. So embarrassing to do something like that in public.
Yesterday afternoon I did a bunch of cooking while Bond played his favorite video game, Horizon Zero Dawn. Franki was at the house by 4:30 and we left for dinner at 5:00pm. The doors opened at 6:30 and the show started an hour later. Selene Luna opened the show and I loved her. Cho was also funny, but I enjoyed Luna as much if not more than Cho.
I spoke to Bond about changing my work hours to 80%. He seems okay with it. I was saying that I need to let my kids know that a change is coming and that I will not be able to financially assist them anymore. He said I should reverse the tables and send them messages like, "Hey, I need bacon. Can you send me $8?" LOL
Now I need to talk to Twitch about selling the house next summer.
Friday night I stayed up past 12:30am - like an idiot. I told myself I could sleep in the next morning. Ha! I totally forgot about the kitty's schedule. Bond is in crunch time, so he was at work until late into the night. I wasn't sure exactly when he came home and crawled in bed, so when the kitty started pestering us I got up with him. My head ached so bad from lack of sleep and damn it, I hadn't stopped at the grocers the night before for heavy whipping cream for my BPC. Ugh. I ended up sneaking back in the bedroom for passable clothing and then did a grocery store run.
Bond got up when I got back, and we showered, quickly made some BPC, and got out the door with the kitten for his vet appointment at 10 o'clock. I was super impressed with how well he did riding in his carrier. He was perfectly relaxed and curious about things. He weighs 6.7lbs at 15 weeks and 3 days of age. He got two shots which wiped him out the rest of the day.
Saturday night B, Bond, and I went to Grind - a dungeon. You may recall, that we had gone for the first time two weeks ago. B is really loving the space. I'm enjoying seeing people I haven't seen in awhile. B wanted to use one of the tables in the medical room to go down on me, while Bond fucked her from behind. I was kind of reluctant to have sex in public, but hey, I took one for the team. After they both orgasmed, we moved to the main dungeon and she talked me into lying on top of a cage with a thick pad on the top where she resumed her attentions. Bond helped me block out the activity of the room and much to my surprise I actually came. So embarrassing to do something like that in public.
Yesterday afternoon I did a bunch of cooking while Bond played his favorite video game, Horizon Zero Dawn. Franki was at the house by 4:30 and we left for dinner at 5:00pm. The doors opened at 6:30 and the show started an hour later. Selene Luna opened the show and I loved her. Cho was also funny, but I enjoyed Luna as much if not more than Cho.
I spoke to Bond about changing my work hours to 80%. He seems okay with it. I was saying that I need to let my kids know that a change is coming and that I will not be able to financially assist them anymore. He said I should reverse the tables and send them messages like, "Hey, I need bacon. Can you send me $8?" LOL
Now I need to talk to Twitch about selling the house next summer.
We came home from a Meetup last night to kitty cries of distress. Max had climbed up to his highway and couldn't get himself down. We seriously need to add more shelves and sisal covered poles, bridges, etcetera for him so he has multiple options to get around and down.
While chit-chatting with friends at the combined Sex Geekdom and Polycocktails meetup we fell on the discussion of bedrooms, spare bedrooms, and guest bedrooms and particularly about how we have two boys who could move their room(s) to the basement where they'd be in a nice room and no longer in a room adjoined to our bedroom via a door (that we have blocked with a piece of furniture.) Bond said that maybe we'd just move them down there regardless of the fact that they've turned us down. I mentioned that we should buy new mattresses for the twin beds in the one room and get the new carpet in the basement. He agreed. It's kind of exciting to think of the adjoining room being empty of boys, because, well, obviously lots more privacy as we are always concerned about sound traveling from our room to theirs, but because we'd use that room as a dressing/sewing room. I'd guess that the room is 14' x 18' with two double reach-in closets along the shared wall between the two bedrooms (two closets and one door.)
Franki and I had a discussion Sunday night while we waited for the show about being open about our relationship or not. She is fine with anyone knowing that we're dating and I'm fine with it, but a bit apprehensive at the same time around certain people knowing. Mostly centered around my middle son who accepts my relationship style in theory, but struggles with it nonetheless, my old boss, two mutual friends of ours who are not poly, and a co-worker I'm friends with on Facebook. Not that any of them have ever said anything, but I do cringe over judgement they may be passing. And to double down on my feelings of being open to these people I also worry that they'll be judgemental on how many partners I have. Gak, this is all so silly and senseless. Franki emailed me that night with concerns about how I felt about it. I talked things through with Bond and it helped some. When it comes down to it, people that care for me should be happy that I'm happy and that I have people to love me. The others really don't matter.
Twitch and I Google chatted yesterday afternoon. I told him that I definitely want to put our house on the market next summer. He did some calculations based on what he thinks we'll get for it, realtor fees, and sales tax (which I had overlooked) and I'll likely walk away with $45-50k. Not quite as much as I was hoping, but it would go a long ways towards chopping my debt down. In a year's time all of the balances should be lower due to continuing to pay things down, so it may possibly be enough to wipe out the cc's, student loans, and a fair amount of my car loan. Depending on the student loan balance, there may be enough to pay off the car loan, if not, at that point I could make double payments due to not having the other debt and pay it off in a matter of months, although if I cut my hours it may not be as quick or easy as I'm dreaming it will be. Wish me luck in having all this come together. It will feel so liberating to be out from under this mountain of debt.
Bond bought a pair of jeans at Costco on the weekend and when he tried them on at home they were too large. He exchanged them yesterday for 32"x30" (should have gotten 32" x 32") and they fit very nicely around his waist. He's lost weight and inches so easily eating keto. Makes me envious. I think I'm going to have to drop the BPC each morning and up the activity. Fudge, fiddlesticks, and damn it. Menopause, you're cruel.
I'm listening to Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett. It's so good. I do believe he's my favorite author. I had spaced out that the book is being made into a movie when I purchased it on Audible, but what a lucky coincidence, huh?!
While chit-chatting with friends at the combined Sex Geekdom and Polycocktails meetup we fell on the discussion of bedrooms, spare bedrooms, and guest bedrooms and particularly about how we have two boys who could move their room(s) to the basement where they'd be in a nice room and no longer in a room adjoined to our bedroom via a door (that we have blocked with a piece of furniture.) Bond said that maybe we'd just move them down there regardless of the fact that they've turned us down. I mentioned that we should buy new mattresses for the twin beds in the one room and get the new carpet in the basement. He agreed. It's kind of exciting to think of the adjoining room being empty of boys, because, well, obviously lots more privacy as we are always concerned about sound traveling from our room to theirs, but because we'd use that room as a dressing/sewing room. I'd guess that the room is 14' x 18' with two double reach-in closets along the shared wall between the two bedrooms (two closets and one door.)
Franki and I had a discussion Sunday night while we waited for the show about being open about our relationship or not. She is fine with anyone knowing that we're dating and I'm fine with it, but a bit apprehensive at the same time around certain people knowing. Mostly centered around my middle son who accepts my relationship style in theory, but struggles with it nonetheless, my old boss, two mutual friends of ours who are not poly, and a co-worker I'm friends with on Facebook. Not that any of them have ever said anything, but I do cringe over judgement they may be passing. And to double down on my feelings of being open to these people I also worry that they'll be judgemental on how many partners I have. Gak, this is all so silly and senseless. Franki emailed me that night with concerns about how I felt about it. I talked things through with Bond and it helped some. When it comes down to it, people that care for me should be happy that I'm happy and that I have people to love me. The others really don't matter.
Twitch and I Google chatted yesterday afternoon. I told him that I definitely want to put our house on the market next summer. He did some calculations based on what he thinks we'll get for it, realtor fees, and sales tax (which I had overlooked) and I'll likely walk away with $45-50k. Not quite as much as I was hoping, but it would go a long ways towards chopping my debt down. In a year's time all of the balances should be lower due to continuing to pay things down, so it may possibly be enough to wipe out the cc's, student loans, and a fair amount of my car loan. Depending on the student loan balance, there may be enough to pay off the car loan, if not, at that point I could make double payments due to not having the other debt and pay it off in a matter of months, although if I cut my hours it may not be as quick or easy as I'm dreaming it will be. Wish me luck in having all this come together. It will feel so liberating to be out from under this mountain of debt.
Bond bought a pair of jeans at Costco on the weekend and when he tried them on at home they were too large. He exchanged them yesterday for 32"x30" (should have gotten 32" x 32") and they fit very nicely around his waist. He's lost weight and inches so easily eating keto. Makes me envious. I think I'm going to have to drop the BPC each morning and up the activity. Fudge, fiddlesticks, and damn it. Menopause, you're cruel.
I'm listening to Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett. It's so good. I do believe he's my favorite author. I had spaced out that the book is being made into a movie when I purchased it on Audible, but what a lucky coincidence, huh?!
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