So Much Confusion...

[GalaGirl]

8 hours of talking seems like a marathon session. I hope you get some rest!

Next time maybe take it in smaller bites?

He tried a bit to bring up extreme outlying examples... 'Oh, what if I fall madly in love with someone tomorrow and want them to move in?'

That's pretty weird to me. Why waste the time and energy "what iffing" the least likely to happen things? Can't outlying examples be dealt with if/when they actually arrive in the interest of reducing marathon sessions to something more reasonable?

But if he wanted an answer today? I would have said "If that happens? You can choose to move out. Just because you fall in love in a day and instantly want to live with the new person doesn't mean *I* want to."

I do want to be able to emotionally stand on my own feet before we would do a hand-fasting or something.

Make sure you can stand on your two feet financially as well. Not just emotionally.

Glad you guys talked and you made some agreements you feel better about though. I am glad you have more clarification. I hope this time he respects your shared agreements/boundaries.

Galagirl

 

[Zephyra]

He's always going through all sorts of scenarios in his head. He hates unknown factors and not having everything planned. A control freak without being a control freak. It plagues his mind, but doesn't manifest himself otherwise. It's a blessing and a curse at times, but I still love him regardless. I even told him how asinine his scenario was, and he even agreed, but it's a what if to him nonetheless. He's funny like that. It's not just where poly is concerned, he tries to analyze every possible outcome of everything... The joys of being with a computer engineer, lol.

Finances are interesting, I have been independent, I know how to be independent, I have the skills to get a job to support myself, but he makes plenty of money, we live more comfortably than most, so work isn't a necessity for me at this time, so I'm only working part time while going to school so I don't lose my mind since I go crazy if I don't have a job. Once I get my LPN and eventually an RN, I'll definitely have the income to support myself.