Three-way relationship gone wrong

L

lilhommiedizzle

New member
She and he were originally together for 3 years. He cheated on her constantly, until I met him and we fell in love. He wanted to have a faithful relationship with me, but he also did not want to leave her, so he and I planned a threesome with her. It's been a few months, and she hasn't been able to get over his cheating and her jealousy, so she decided to end things with him.

He decided to "take a break" from me, because he thought that she and I had a "fake relationship," which isn't true. I tried my best to keep them both happy, but there were many emotional slips here and there. They have broken up many times in the past, and although they don't have much in common, she took care of him, and he provided her with excitement. The relationship between him and me was more balanced and passionate, and she couldn't take it. Hence, she ended things.

I'm currently trying to keep the relationship I have with him, but I recently found out that she is also trying to get him back, despite sending him dozens of letters about why they aren't good together. She seems to be on and off about it. He is having his heart torn apart by two girls. :(

As much as I don't want to be without him, I want him to be able to stabilize his life and be happy, even if it means being without him.

I need advice!
I'm crazy for him.
 
Well, this sounds like a bummer all around. I can't say that you should be with him or without him, but it you have to ask yourself, besides the NRE excitement that you may have experienced, what else are you getting from this relationship? You sound like you are thinking practically, at least in looking out for each other's well-being. Time may be the only thing that will provide any help in this situation, and that's the hardest thing of all to deal with, I know. Learn from this experience and think about what you want in the next relationship.

Good luck!
 
Yep and yep

nycindie said:
It sounds like a big, unnecessary drama you need to walk away from. He needs to step up instead of letting himself be yanked around. You need to be strong. There will be other loves. I would move on...
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I completely agree. This situation isn't about love or relationships, it's about the drama. Distance and a lot of self care do some amazing things.
 
It sounds like he was cheating on her with you when you met, as she didn't know he'd met you. He didn't have her blessing to go out and find girlfriends. Cheating takes years to get over... actually, I personally believe that people never really do. I would not be able to trust that he didn't ambush her into having a threesome, and that she did it, even though she didn't want to, so as to not lose him.

I think I would say good bye with a polite note that he should work on his relationship with her, allow her to regain trust, not push her into being something and someone she isn't, and if he loves her to slow down and not rush any new relationships until SHE it ready. Then I would walk away, and not cheat with anyone ever again, having learned the damage it does to people, and because you want to live a life of integrity that brings you and those in your life more love, feelings of worthiness and belonging.
 
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