Two year triad

[fay2984]

Hi, I am a 34 year old female who has been in a form of polyamorous relationship with a husband and wife. Almost two year ago, I met a man, J, and we became good friends. He then introduced me to his wife, H, and shortly after a form of relationship developed between the three of us. It has just recently become more of an official, closed relationship where J has his marriage with H but also a serious committed relationship with me. H and I are very close and have developed our own form of relationship, however, she is struggling a little more accepting labels due to her family upbringing. It is not that she doesn't want our triad, she sometimes struggles with the fact that she is very happy with what we have and how it goes against everything that she was raised to believe.

Although the three of us have been in this relationship for some time now, we have never met or spoken to any other people in similar relationships. There has been a great deal of figuring things out as we go. It would be great to have the opportunities to speak to and learn from others and also have a place where we can be open about what we share. J and H have a child and we are very careful to keep our relationship from him. He sees me as part of the family but just mom and dad's really close friend. Because of religious beliefs, we have not told any of our families. My mom knows about it and it is clear that J's mom is starting to put pieces together.

I have never joined a forum before, but looking forward to learning more and meeting others in similar relationships.

 

[WhatHappened]

Are you and his wife in a sexual, romantic relationship? That's a triad.

If you and his wife are close friends, then you are in a V with him as the hinge.

 

[fay2984]

Are you and his wife in a sexual, romantic relationship? That's a triad.

If you and his wife are close friends, then you are in a V with him as the hinge.

Yes, she and I are in a sexual, romantic relationship. We are just moving forward more slowly as she finds her way through the whole notion of being in this kind of relationship. This is not something the three of us ever thought we would experience, we didn’t go looking for this kind of relationship, it just naturally happened. She and I have date nights, I have date nights with him, they have date nights and then all three of us have date nights together. All three of us are very much involved with each other.

 

[kdt26417]

Greetings fay2984,
Welcome to our forum. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.

It sounds like you have a really sweet triad going, I know there are challenges but you are doing admirably. Triads are less common than V's but we do have a number of triads on this site. You can definitely speak to and learn from others here, as well as have a place where you can be open about things. Have a look around on our various threads and boards, and don't hesitate to post any questions you may have. I'm glad you could join us.

Sincerely,
Kevin T., "official greeter"

Notes:

There's a *lot* of good info in Golden Nuggets. Have a look!

Please read through the guidelines if you haven't already.

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If you have any questions about the board itself, please private-message a mod and they'll do their best to help.

Welcome aboard!

 

[kittyxuchiha11]

Hi and welcome here!

My triad with my girls may be a hell of a lot newer, but yup i'm one of those members in a triad here. If you ever want to have a chat, you're welcome to PM me

 

[Al99]

Hi fay2984 - and welcome to the Forum! We will look forward to hearing more of your story as it continues to evolve. Please do not hesitate to join in the conversation with any specific thoughts and questions that you may have.

FMF triads sometimes get a bad rap in the poly world because they are usually associated with Unicorn hunters (who often seem to perhaps have less than ethical standards). However, I have read numerous times here and elsewhere that such triads can certainly work when they evolve naturally and organically as yours seems to have done.

Best of luck on your journey!

Al

 

[fay2984]

Thanks

Hi fay2984 - and welcome to the Forum! We will look forward to hearing more of your story as it continues to evolve. Please do not hesitate to join in the conversation with any specific thoughts and questions that you may have.

FMF triads sometimes get a bad rap in the poly world because they are usually associated with Unicorn hunters (who often seem to perhaps have less than ethical standards). However, I have read numerous times here and elsewhere that such triads can certainly work when they evolve naturally and organically as yours seems to have done.

Best of luck on your journey!

Al

Thank you! Yes believe me when I say H and I never ever imagined we would be in this kind of relationship. Neither did J for that matter. Neither H or I have ever beeen involved with a woman before or has any desire to be. It all happened very naturally and took us by surprise. It hasn’t been easy but the three of us are definitely better for it!

 

[fay2984]

Hi!

Hi and welcome here!

My triad with my girls may be a hell of a lot newer, but yup i'm one of those members in a triad here. If you ever want to have a chat, you're welcome to PM me

Hi, tanks for reaching out. It would be great to be able to talk to others in a triad. There have been plenty of bumps over the last year and sometimes it’s felt like we were stumbling blindly along. I’m also here if you would like to chat!