Whirlwind introduction

K

ksim

New member
Hey guys.

I'm new to all this and because I've been winging it, I'm now in a bit of a mess - because I've fallen in love again.

I'm a gay man from the UK. I'm in my early 30s and married and been with my husband for 10 years - we met just after we graduated and I moved back to my home city.

Probably I would imagine it isn't unusual that I've been bought up in a 'traditional' environment culturally that says monogamy is the only way. I've internalised a lot tbh. It took me a long time to even admit to myself I was gay.

Anyway, here I am. Exploring. Looking for ways - out? No. Just ways.

I am poly. This is the first time I've said those words without "probably" or "maybe" or "sort of" or other even hazier hedging. My husband is less certain...curious, I don't know - maybe he'd consider his desire to experiment sexually (the agreement that has rather blown my internalised barriers about polyamory to smithereens) as more of a phase.

I've no idea. Everything and everyone is so hard to read or understand. I feel lost with just all this cloud of dizzying feeling around me. I also have ADHD, which doesn't help the filtering process!!
 
OMG. Rookie mistake. This was meant for the Introductions forum :(

Can a mod move it? :/

Sorry :/ :/
 
ksim said:
OMG. Rookie mistake. This was meant for the Introductions forum :(

Can a mod move it? :/

Sorry :/ :/
Click to expand...

One of the mods will move it when they notice it. You're good :)
 
NO worries! We can still greet you here! Welcome to the forum. :)
 
Welcome, ksim! - absolutely no big deal on posting in this section. I've only been here a couple of months myself - and new to poly as well, but have found everyone to be very welcoming and helpful - with lots of sound advice and good information.

Al
 
Greetings ksim,
Welcome to our forum. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.

Much of your key to success lies with communication, both quantity and quality. It's how you explore deeper into what your husband wants (for example). I hope you'll keep us posted as the two of you work things out!

Sincerely,
Kevin T., "official greeter" :)

Notes:

There's a *lot* of good info in Golden Nuggets. Have a look!

Please read through the guidelines if you haven't already.

Note: You needn't read every reply to your posts, especially if someone posts in a disagreeable way. Given the size and scope of the site it's hard not to run into the occasional disagreeable person. Please contact the mods if you do (or if you see any spam), and you can block the person if you want.

If you have any questions about the board itself, please private-message a mod and they'll do their best to help.

Welcome aboard!
 
Thanks so much for the welcome everyone.

Weirdly, the same day I finally signed up here, I actually started chatting to someone on Grindr who turned out to be poly. He's given me a lot of great food for thought.

I've also read some threads now. I guess I was daunted at first, but, really, I'm much more excited about the possibilities than I had been. I'm prepared for this to not always be the case.

I'm going to keep looking around, and maybe replying on here and seeing where I get to...but I may write a longer 'situational' post as well. I'm a bit of a storm of feelings right now - both good and bad, helpful and not. Let's see where this heads.
 
Welcome to the forum! Take your time to browse the forum - there is a vast amount of information available here.

When I first started reading here, I found the General Poly Discussions forum especially useful. Also Franklin Veaux's poly pages on morethantwo.com are a good place to start gathering information about polyamory.

Don't hesitate to post any comments and questions you might have!
 
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