New(ish) possible partner and children

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I'd you keep acting like a nut, your kids will probably gravitate towards someone who at least behaves rationally. If you really want to prevent your kids turning their back on you and going to her, show that you are a healthy individual who doesn't allow their emotions to rule their lives.

It's absolutely irrelevant how they behave in the context of romantic relationships, because it has next to no impact on one's ability to parent. If your intention is to use the children as tools to punish them for being bad at romantic relationships, carry on, you're on the right track. If your main priority is the well-being of your children, perhaps let go of all your anger and resentment.
 
I've said before that these are all issues in your romantic relationships and should have no bearing on how you make decisions regarding your children. Your adult, romantic relationships are between you and the consenting adults you have them with, not your children. I'm sorry if that is difficult to comprehend, but a failure to understand this concept can be as harmful to children as anything your spouse can do to betray you.
 
If the roles were reversed and you were the one with a new husband, do you think your ex should have the right to prevent his children from spending time with the two of you?
 
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Emm said:
If the roles were reversed and you were the one with a new husband, do you think your ex should have the right to prevent you from allowing his children to spend time with the two of you?
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If he had good reason to, yes, it would be ok, and I would understand. Like I have said before, I am not ready right now. In a year or whenever I will come to deal with it.
 
london said:
All this post deleting is tiresome. Some forums have explicit rules against it. I'm more strongly in favour of them now.
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Report me then. I am asking for advice on how to one day be ok with this, not asking you to tell me I am a nut.

Thanks for making me feel worse than I already do. If you don't like what I am posting, you can leave.
 
jones said:
If he had good reason to, yes, it would be ok and I would understand. Like I have said before, I am not ready right now. In a year or whenever, I will come to deal with it.
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And would you accept "because I don't like him" as a good reason, or would you feel he was unfairly keeping you from your children?

Edit: remember, agreeing would entail you and your new husband being unable to see your children for a year or until whenever he comes to deal with it.
 
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Emm said:
And would you accept "because I don't like him" as a good reason or would you feel he was unfairly keeping you from your children?
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It's not about not liking her at all. It's about what she has done, calling herself Mummy Jen and so much more.
 
Legally, that isn't a problem. It's just a slightly more convoluted way of saying "I don't like her" and would probably have as much weight in court.
 
london said:
All this post deleting is tiresome. Some forums have explicit rules against it. I'm more strongly in favour of them now.
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Every member here has the possibility to edit or delete posts up to 12 hours after originally posting it. You can find the User Guidlines here: http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1787. Jones could have deleted all her posts within that time if she wanted to, and it's perfectly fine to do that, whether you like it or not. Your disapproval does not matter. If reading the thread is tiresome for you, I suggest you stop reading it.
 
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Closing this thread as there seems to be a lot missing here. If you wish to continue this discussion you'll have to start a new thread and cease removing contents from your posts.
 
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