Poly Family

[spidy]

I'm interested in the idea of a poly family. I'm in a mono relationship with Aaron, and would like to stay mono, but am okay with Aaron having another person. I'm thinking that a triad isn't able to work. Maybe a quad is a better idea.

I'm attracted by the idea of an emotional connection with other people, but not sexual, and also having a larger family group living in one household. I have one child with Aaron, and would like more. I'm also not liking the idea of Aaron having children with another person (as if it didn't work out, I think that would be a problem). I think Aaron isn't interested, either. So the other two are of a couple first, and Aaron is her secondary? Thinking as I'm typing.

What are everyone's first thoughts? I'd like to figure out what I want before bringing this up with Aaron.

 

[MonoVCPHG]

I'm in a mono relationship and would like to stay mono but am okay with Aaron having another person. I'm thinking that a triad isn't able to work. Maybe a quad is a better idea.

If you aren't taking on another romantic love, and are monogamous, then having a triad or quad isn't really going to work. Both relationship dynamics come with the idea of you having physical intimacy with someone other than your boyfriend. It looks like you would be ok in a "V," with Aaron as the "hinge," and possibly an extended family through his partnership. You don't have to be poly to be with a partner who is.

 

[redpepper]

I love that you are thinking about this, but I would be wary about having any preconceived notions about what would work best. Just staying open to possibilities, and keeping thoughts in mind seems to work the best for people.

I agree with Mono. If you don't want another love in your life other than Aaron, anything you create would be a vee. Doesn't really matter though. Just go with your heart, rather than the definitions, maybe? That way you can let it go and just feel what is right. That is what worked for me.