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Hey, so me and my partner Jason have been dating for over two years now. At the moment we are in a long-distance relationship. He plans to move out to me in a month. He has been struggling with his mental health quite a bit lately. This is not a particularly new struggle. However it is...

I think one important aspect to a healthy poly relationship is the ability to trust your partner in the choices they make with time management, as well as being able to trust them with the relationships they choose to develop. It seems like she's not willing/ready / able to give you that...

You mentioned in your post that co-primary relationship is not something you are looking for and you have expressed that to your girlfriend. I was a bit unclear on what her reaction to that was. Is she comfortable with higher key? Or not pursuing np in a co-primary co- live in life partner...

Just a friendly reminder that just wanting a purly sexual relationship with someone is okay as long as you are up front with what you were looking for and both people are on the same page and want the same thing. There is a difference between two consenting adults sharing sex for the purpose of...

I got a similar feeling as Kevin. I get the impression that maybe he wants to keep things open and he wants to maintain his freedom but is scared that that desire will upset you. I also think it would be a good idea to affirm to him that you are comfortable with continuing an open/poly...

So one thing that pops up in your post, you say you don't have much communication with her directly, correct? Yep I see lots of "she feels this..." "She wants x,y &z" ""she agreed to []". My question is how recent is this information and where is it from? Things your partner has told you...

If Neneh doesn't want poly then him continuing to see her will not end well for you. That seems like a shitty situation :(

Hold up. I think it is important to distinguish the difference between moving towards a Triad, and threesomes. Nowhere in OPs post if he mention that his Partners were interested in a romantic connection outside of their connection with him. To me it does not sound like he is forcing or even...

So personally I have a very similar view on privacy as SchrodingersCat. However I also practice relationship anarchy. So I wouldn't say that the views on privacy and relationship styles are related. I am an open book and do not like secrets. I operate a similar way to SchrodingersCat. Both in...

Read this today and wanted to share https://medium.com/@PolyamoryINC/the-most-skipped-step-when-opening-a-relationship-f1f67abbbd49

I think cause alot of the underlying feelings and issues are the same. Because there is alot of overlap. And the topic here doesn't seem to be BDSM. Also I got the impression that OP is not currently engaging in a BDSM relationship, and not engaging in play, for the reasons stated in the...

As a transman who has seen his partner be with other men in a way that I can not be with him, due to a lack of anatomy that I cannot change, I have a whole ton of empathy for your feelings of envy. It helps me to acknowledge that these feelings are my baggage, not my partner's. Knowing it's on...

I share some of the same concerns as Magdlyn. How healthy is the dynamic between you and K? Is there any concerns about codependency? Or manipulation? You have not listed any desire or reasons that you would want to break up with C. Yet K seems to be pressuring you into it... Is C okay with you...

Whoopse, didn't see your response. My bad. But yeah. I agree with you- it's totally about communication and setting to and following through with expectations. I hope your talk goes well!

The issue does seem poly in nature to me. At the root of it it's about SOs ability to manage his relationships and be a hinge between his two partners. I've been in a situation where my partner's passivity and lack of communication required me and my meta to communicate for plans. This was not...

Honestly your girlfriend sounds alot like my ex girlfriend. She may honestly feel the things, but that doesn't mean she isn't also manipulating you with them. Timing and consideration are real. I think the important question with that is do you feel manipulated by her? Sorry to be blunt but...

Thank you for your insight GalaGirl

We used to be in a V with me as the hinge. Poly variables were a factor in out break up. I posted about it here a few months ago.

What do you mean by this? How close friends are you? Would you be comfortable talking to him about this lifestyle choice/identity/Relationship structure?

I think it's not so concrete as energy in -> energy out. I get the impression you may still be operating from a scarcity mindset. I know when I was the hinge in a V I found that each Relationship made *me* better and then I could be a better partner to both of my partners. And in turn, both of...