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So he is already being secretive again, and you have already caught him lying again. Yet you are not keeping the promise you made to him and yourself to end it. Why? Do you not value your own words?

I am not a fan of parallel poly. I was in a parallel situation once and it felt like living a double life, I found the requirement for segregation inconvenient (to put it as politely as possible). Having a partner who is so on-edge they cant bear the sight of, or exchange pleasantries with a...

That’s my take away from this as well…. Hopefully the side piece gets the support her and the child need and deserve.

Get out of her way or walk away.

I too made many mistakes. I think my strength through the process was honesty, even if I didn’t know why I felt the way I did, I was honest about the way I felt and what I wanted in the moment. I think the probability of two people falling in love with each other and avoiding any mistakes along...

This situation sucks a bit, I can imagine this is a bit stressful for you. Do you love your pregnant partner? Given that none of us are provided a crystal ball that will tell us about our future regrets before they happen, I try to approach decision making as stacking decisions with the...

The demographics here might have more to do with this website's format and vibe.. You might not come to the same conclusion browsing the r/Polyamory reddit, but who knows... I began doing drugs at a young age however I am mostly free of them now... I think drug use was the first thing that...

By practicing hierarchy you already are…

There are many layers to these types issues and the problem can be exacerbated by poly. How is someone who you already have dwindling desire for going to compete with the NRE fueled desire for a new partner? Fantastic sex with a new partner can have an overshadowing effect…. Consider the effect...

You sound extremely anxious. I understand that you have a lot of emotions about this. You are justified in being concerned about your own health and wellbeing. The types of experiences your partner is interested in pursuing are not without risk. I know everyone is "getting tested" prior to...

Dating can be such an emotional roller coaster. The individual you have described sounds like they have a lot going on. Maybe he got busy and needs some more time to respond?

I am a hinge as well. Over the years I have felt guilt over a lot of different little things, including sex and finances. I do not have a balanced sex life with both of my partners, meaning I have sex with one partner more often than the other. I think everyone felt a tad guilty about it...

It sounds like you are trying to date mono women… Following the car salesman analogy, you are trying to sell a corvette to a family of ten… There may be some adventurous souls out there who are curious about what it is like to own a corvette even though they know it is completely wrong for...

I am not sure I understand the assumption of innocence for a registered pedophile… This couple could be telling you stories man…

I get what you are saying and I don’t subscribe to the idea of referring to this as “punishing her” as you described in the original post. You are not punishing someone for looking out for your own interests, that’s just guilt, and guilt doesn’t serve you. We all have our limits. I can think...

A counselor that specializes in trauma may be able to help you work through some of your feelings. I have been guilty of sabotaging relationships myself; I know therapy can be expensive but I can say that it was money well spent in my case and definitely helped me create healthier relationships...

Having new lovers often makes me feel more passion and appreciation for my other lovers whom I have had a long established relationship with.

Whether it’s a business partnership, or a romantic partnership; each party should be enthusiastic about the prospects. My advice might be different if you were poly, but from a mono perspective creating your *single and most important* partnership on the foundation of begging, coercing, or...

It’s generally considered a common practice to not see or be friends with your metas (it’s not a philosophy I personally subscribe too) but common none the less. Frankly your situation sounds really difficult…. I take it your gf was not all that enthusiastic about entering a relationship with...

Maybe you should read some books before posting. Talking about your insecurities with a bunch of internet strangers who are already hip to the philosophy is going to be disorienting for you. Frequently recommended titles include: More Than Two Polysecure Sex at Dawn