New2polydude
New member
Many people are ashamed of some aspect of their physical appearance, especially weight. Has having poly relationships helped you with this? or has body shame kept you from taking the plunge?
Body shame...
- Thread starter New2polydude
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I'm a bit on the fluffy side, and it's rarely seemed to be a problem. I guess it helps I have a rather pretty face, I know how to dress to flatter my figure, I carry myself with confidence, take care of my hair and skin.
There are lots of guys, I found, who prefer a bigger girl, or just don't care if you're big or small or average.
One time, on OK Cupid back in the day, this local guy caught my eye. He was super gorgeous, like almost a high-quality body-builder type, really fit, a firefighter/EMS dude. Smokin.' I figured I'd never stand a chance. I don't remember how, but somehow we hooked up.
(It didn't last long; we had different life goals. He literally wanted to buy a boat and sail around the world...)
My current bf is quite objectively handsome too, muscular, tall, long dreads and a nice beard.
He definitely prefers bigger women (and older women), so lucky me. He'd even be happy if I were bigger, but I don't want to gain because of health reasons, of course!
On the other hand, lots of couples who open up, generally guys whose female partners are getting lots of dates, and they aren't, get motivated to do their best to become more fit and attractive, go to gym or start a sport, watch diet, buy some new more fashionable clothes, get a decent haircut and beard grooming, etc.
There are lots of guys, I found, who prefer a bigger girl, or just don't care if you're big or small or average.
One time, on OK Cupid back in the day, this local guy caught my eye. He was super gorgeous, like almost a high-quality body-builder type, really fit, a firefighter/EMS dude. Smokin.' I figured I'd never stand a chance. I don't remember how, but somehow we hooked up.
(It didn't last long; we had different life goals. He literally wanted to buy a boat and sail around the world...) My current bf is quite objectively handsome too, muscular, tall, long dreads and a nice beard.
He definitely prefers bigger women (and older women), so lucky me. He'd even be happy if I were bigger, but I don't want to gain because of health reasons, of course!On the other hand, lots of couples who open up, generally guys whose female partners are getting lots of dates, and they aren't, get motivated to do their best to become more fit and attractive, go to gym or start a sport, watch diet, buy some new more fashionable clothes, get a decent haircut and beard grooming, etc.
Hi New2polydude,
I weigh about 215 pounds, and wish I could weigh 180 like I did when I was younger. The bottom line is, I am not inclined to diet, instead I have resigned myself to being somewhat on the heavy side. I suppose polyamory helps because the pressure is off of me to compete with my metamour, who has a better body than me. Not perfect, but better. Honestly, I just don't think about it much nowadays.
Regards,
Kevin T.
I weigh about 215 pounds, and wish I could weigh 180 like I did when I was younger. The bottom line is, I am not inclined to diet, instead I have resigned myself to being somewhat on the heavy side. I suppose polyamory helps because the pressure is off of me to compete with my metamour, who has a better body than me. Not perfect, but better. Honestly, I just don't think about it much nowadays.
Regards,
Kevin T.
CoralRose
Member
I definitely think it's gone both ways for me. I didn't become poly until after I had my son and although I'm active and eat well, I have some underlying issues since having my son that have made losing weight a battle. I look at old pictures of myself and miss what I used to look like. I've always been more attracted to someone based on their personality and hope that others can do the same.