LiraelNighteyes
New member
I'm coming out to my parents this week as poly. I'm very nervous and would love some words of support from the poly community! 
Coming out to parents
- Thread starter LiraelNighteyes
- Start date
SquishyHusk
Active member
Don't be surprised if their initial reaction is negative, it takes some time to process. Have faith they'll accept it given time. Make sure to emphasize that it is about love.
If it helps to hear how it went for me: we've never come out, but we don't hide anything either.
My mom thinks it's 'strange' but otherwise accepts it - or at least refrains from saying anything against it.
Cookie's parents treat Pumpkin like their own daughter.
Pumpkin's mom refuses to acknowledge the relationship, but treats our kid (Cookie & mine) as a granddaughter.
If it helps to hear how it went for me: we've never come out, but we don't hide anything either.
My mom thinks it's 'strange' but otherwise accepts it - or at least refrains from saying anything against it.
Cookie's parents treat Pumpkin like their own daughter.
Pumpkin's mom refuses to acknowledge the relationship, but treats our kid (Cookie & mine) as a granddaughter.
LiraelNighteyes
New member
Thank you! X
It's hard to know what to tell you. It's like coming out as gay or queer. If your parents are more progressive they might not take that much time to adjust, but if they are conservative they might get really upset. Also, it depends on if you currently have other partners. And it depends on whether you have kids.
If you've already made some alternative decisions in your adult life that go against the choices your parents themselves would have made, but you've gotten them to see the world didn't end, and you're fine and safe and healthy, that's a good way to gauge how they might react to you coming out as poly.
If you've already made some alternative decisions in your adult life that go against the choices your parents themselves would have made, but you've gotten them to see the world didn't end, and you're fine and safe and healthy, that's a good way to gauge how they might react to you coming out as poly.
You also don't say how old you are, how old your parents are, whether or not they are religious, whether you live with them, whether you're financially dependent on them, if you have more than one partner already, etc. but I wish you good luck, that's about all I can do.
Bobbi
Well-known member
My dad was supportive, but he's the kind as long as I'm happy, he's happy. But he thought I was getting some sex on the side. Looking back, I wouldn't use the word polyamorous, because nobody really knows what it means. I'd just say that I'm doing relationships differently. I'm having them with more than one person. I've chosen to not be monogamous, but to fall in love with more than one person.
My NP had some family support him. Other family couldn't understand why we just didn't end it if we were to unhappy we needed others, and said he'd never visit. He thinks it's a swingers party here every night.
Every person will have their own reactions. Good luck!
My NP had some family support him. Other family couldn't understand why we just didn't end it if we were to unhappy we needed others, and said he'd never visit. He thinks it's a swingers party here every night.
Every person will have their own reactions. Good luck!