For a couple of weeks I have been talking to my ex’s again. A married couple. They live about 1 and 20 minutes from me. So we haven’t meet up again yet do to schedule. We agreed to keep it friends. So since we agreed on that I have been still looking online for the right ones or person. A few days ago I found a female who wants to have a three way with her ex husband and if things go well keep doing that and her and I will date. They are about a 1 hour way as well. Today she wants to meet soon like Saturday to see if we like each other because her ex is going to be gone driving truck for a while. I told her I will have to see as I think that’s fast.
Then tonight my ex’s told me that they have been talking and they want to get back together with me. Have a relationship. I don’t know what to do because I want to see what happened with this new people but I also want my ex’s back in my life. Both are very hard decisions.
Here’s why it’s hard for me. The new people never had a three way and she has never dated a women but would like to. From her picture and conversation I do like her but I don’t think I want to be the director of this. I don’t know if I want to be someone’s first. I don’t know if I like him yet because I haven’t even seen a photo of him. He is truck driver. With my schedule of working different nights and him always gone this would never really happen. But on that note I would get a lot of time alone with her. They have a car and are willing to come and meet me for breakfast Saturday. I haven’t said yes this really moved fasted. We hardly talked. I don’t really know if I can trust that they will not just stop talking me when they change there mind. It’s happens way more to me then say this isn’t working or I want to breakup. I know my ex’s will tell if this isn’t working or life is gets in the way.
With my ex’s they are out poly, and have done this before. We did it for six months off and on. But we did break up. It would be hard too because they don’t have Car right now as they can walk everywhere and wanted to pay off bills and got a house. So that would mean me going up there all the time. They have offer to pay my gas for me sometimes which does help but that’s a lot of miles.
For the both of them it’s hard because I have to keep it from people because they won’t understand. I live in a apartment building and people are always out side. We are all close. Some know my parents well. So if I’m gone a-lot they will noticed because I won’t be there to hang like we all do. Same if others come to stay. So that would mean me going up there all the time and people would notice if I’m not home when they are outside. I could see myself spending a few days up there as my schedule works that way. There would be questions and I’m just not ready to say. I’m not about lying either saying I was just visiting friends when they are a lot more then that. To me that miss leading people. I know how some of my friends were when I finally told them she’s not a friend but girlfriend. They felt like they didn’t know me, like I didn’t trust them, and what else am I hiding. When my neighbor found out about this she felt the same away. We had drinks so many times she said I don’t know who you are. Your just saying that to get attention. She got over but still.
There are so many other things going though my head. What if my ex’s change there mind again, and what if I pick the new ones and it doesn’t work I can’t say now I’m ready for this. I had to tell my ex’s yes I want that to as I do. I have missed them. They wanted to know a answer and I’m not sure I don’t think would work. I be a-fended if someone said to me wait I need to think. Confused.
Then tonight my ex’s told me that they have been talking and they want to get back together with me. Have a relationship. I don’t know what to do because I want to see what happened with this new people but I also want my ex’s back in my life. Both are very hard decisions.
Here’s why it’s hard for me. The new people never had a three way and she has never dated a women but would like to. From her picture and conversation I do like her but I don’t think I want to be the director of this. I don’t know if I want to be someone’s first. I don’t know if I like him yet because I haven’t even seen a photo of him. He is truck driver. With my schedule of working different nights and him always gone this would never really happen. But on that note I would get a lot of time alone with her. They have a car and are willing to come and meet me for breakfast Saturday. I haven’t said yes this really moved fasted. We hardly talked. I don’t really know if I can trust that they will not just stop talking me when they change there mind. It’s happens way more to me then say this isn’t working or I want to breakup. I know my ex’s will tell if this isn’t working or life is gets in the way.
With my ex’s they are out poly, and have done this before. We did it for six months off and on. But we did break up. It would be hard too because they don’t have Car right now as they can walk everywhere and wanted to pay off bills and got a house. So that would mean me going up there all the time. They have offer to pay my gas for me sometimes which does help but that’s a lot of miles.
For the both of them it’s hard because I have to keep it from people because they won’t understand. I live in a apartment building and people are always out side. We are all close. Some know my parents well. So if I’m gone a-lot they will noticed because I won’t be there to hang like we all do. Same if others come to stay. So that would mean me going up there all the time and people would notice if I’m not home when they are outside. I could see myself spending a few days up there as my schedule works that way. There would be questions and I’m just not ready to say. I’m not about lying either saying I was just visiting friends when they are a lot more then that. To me that miss leading people. I know how some of my friends were when I finally told them she’s not a friend but girlfriend. They felt like they didn’t know me, like I didn’t trust them, and what else am I hiding. When my neighbor found out about this she felt the same away. We had drinks so many times she said I don’t know who you are. Your just saying that to get attention. She got over but still.
There are so many other things going though my head. What if my ex’s change there mind again, and what if I pick the new ones and it doesn’t work I can’t say now I’m ready for this. I had to tell my ex’s yes I want that to as I do. I have missed them. They wanted to know a answer and I’m not sure I don’t think would work. I be a-fended if someone said to me wait I need to think. Confused.
