Dating Sites- Advice

nt700

New member
My partner and I are considering posting an ad.
I read a fellow member mentioned the site, BeyondTwo.
Can anyone recommend a site and share their experiences?
Craigslist has its place, but we were looking for mature, serious individuals.:)
 
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Still Searching

Thanks, Cindie.
There are not of gay men on the forum.
However, I will check out the Golden Nuggets section.:)
 
Hi nt700,

The poly-friendly dating sites I know of are:

In addition you might try looking for a poly group in or near Austin. Sites to help you look:

We have a Dating & Friendships (North America) board that might be helpful as well. And there is http://grindr.com/ ... a geolocation app for phones; I hear it's geared toward gay men.

I have heard of some people having some luck with OKCupid, but not everyone does. Dating sites tend to have free accounts and paid accounts; obviously the paid accounts give you considerably more options.

Hope that helps ...
Sincerely,
Kevin T.
 
I used plenty of dating websites. Some of them free, some of them requires a small fee in order to use full functionality.

I can suggest to use these websites:
1. http://www.okcupid.com/ (You can use it for free)
2. http://kovla.com/ They have a good app for iOS. I'm using it at work and other places.

That's it. My best friend found boyfriend on second website. So have a good luck and don't afraid anything!)
 
My partner and I are considering posting an ad.
I read a fellow member mentioned the site, BeyondTwo.
Can anyone recommend a site and share their experiences?
Craigslist has its place, but we were looking for mature, serious individuals.:)

So you are a gay male couple looking for a third man to "share"? You want a mature serious individual who will love and lust for both of you equally and long term?

This is called unicorn hunting. To create a box for a new partner to fit into, and seek such a person. This hardly ever works, you know... just sayin.'

What works better for couples new to poly is to open up and let each one seek their own OSO. If you can't imagine that, you aren't ready for polyamory.

You two may have unexamined couple privilege and any new partners who agree to be "added as a third" to your established couple, will feel lesser than. What if he falls in love with only one of you after having had sex with both? Does he get dumped? What would be the repercussions of that, for each of you, for your couple, for the hypothetical unicorn?
 
A lot to take in

Hi Madelyn. When I wrote share I was referring to sharing experiences. However, you raise good points. Given your points and advice, I am beginning to believe that the poly lifestyle is near to impossible.
 
Thank you

Thank you Miss Marie. I appreciate the information and kind words. Happy holidays to you and yours. Kindest regards - Dave
 
Re (from nt700):
"I am beginning to believe that the poly lifestyle is near to impossible."

Depends what you mean by "the poly lifestyle." Poly comes in a wide range of shapes and forms. Some are harder to do than others. Your best bet is to let each new poly relationship shape itself -- rather than impose a lot of expectations on it.
 
harsh words from magdyln

I thought magdlyn's comments were uncalled for. If she is a senior member who communicates to people in this manner than this is not the forum for me. Who does she think she is? Dr. Laura of the poly world.
 
Well, I hope you don't leave us. I think with a forum this big, one has to figure that there's going to be some members one won't get along with. Sorry to say I've been right about that in several cases. I wish I could get along with everyone, but I can't. So, I just try to not engage the handful of members I don't think I can engage civilly.

The site guidelines allow for some friction to occur between members, although there are some specific behaviors that are prohibited. You can report stuff to the mods if you find it offensive; also you can block certain members if you'd rather not see what they post.

You'll have to decide if you want to put up with the forum's weak areas. I do sympathize and I hope you won't leave us.
 
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I thought magdlyn's comments were uncalled for. If she is a senior member who communicates to people in this manner than this is not the forum for me. Who does she think she is? Dr. Laura of the poly world.

As far as I can see, she defined a term you may not have been familiar with, pointed out a couple of the more commonly found pitfalls new-to-poly people tend to wander into, and gave you some advice on how to avoid them yourself. At no point was she rude or dismissive. If you would prefer not to receive advice I recommend starting a thread in the Blogs section.
 
You'll have to decide if you want to put up with the forum's weak areas. I do sympathize and I hope you won't leave us.

Bullshit, Kevin, you know I am not a weak area.

As far as I can see, she defined a term you may not have been familiar with, pointed out a couple of the more commonly found pitfalls new-to-poly people tend to wander into, and gave you some advice on how to avoid them yourself. At no point was she rude or dismissive. If you would prefer not to receive advice I recommend starting a thread in the Blogs section.

My red flag was "my partner and I are .... posting an ad." Couples posting as one entity are generally doomed to fail at finding more than some temporary 3way sex. Look around this site, you'll see many frustrated unicorn hunters. Just trying to save you some frustration and heartbreak, dude.
 
Re:
"Bullshit, Kevin, you know I am not a weak area."

In all fairness, that is true. You are an excellent contributor to the forum and just because my communication style may tend to be different, doesn't mean I should want you to be a clone of me. The only difference in our styles is that I'm often too chicken to tell it like it is. Or at the least, I can't tell it like it is while keeping my cool, so I just chicken out of the conversation.

That seems safe to say, because nt700 probably won't even bother looking at this thread again. You, in contrast, will be around for a long time, offering people feedback and making Polyamory.com the valuable resource that it is.

I mean that in all sincerity. Let's continue to be friends.
With regards,
Kevin T.
 
Re:


In all fairness, that is true. You are an excellent contributor to the forum and just because my communication style may tend to be different, doesn't mean I should want you to be a clone of me. The only difference in our styles is that I'm often too chicken to tell it like it is. Or at the least, I can't tell it like it is while keeping my cool, so I just chicken out of the conversation.

That seems safe to say, because nt700 probably won't even bother looking at this thread again. You, in contrast, will be around for a long time, offering people feedback and making Polyamory.com the valuable resource that it is.

I mean that in all sincerity. Let's continue to be friends.
With regards,
Kevin T.

Of course, Kevin. You're a kind hearted ex Mormon from Utah, I'm an outspoken girl from New York. Dude should've realized you're just as much a representative of the board as I am, and have 2000 more posts than I do! All us "senior members" are not clones and do not "represent" some sort of groupmind preaching the One True Poly. Sheesh!
 
Yeah, it would take something away from Polyamory.com if we didn't have the diversity that we have. What good is a bunch of people telling you the same thing? With many different points of view, you can take away whatever viewpoints make the most sense to you personally. The price of admission is that you'll hear some stuff you don't agree with. Not such a steep price, I think.
 
I thought magdlyn's comments were uncalled for. If she is a senior member who communicates to people in this manner than this is not the forum for me. Who does she think she is? Dr. Laura of the poly world.

Huh? That is a complete turnaround from:
Hi Madelyn . . . you raise good points.

This is a public forum on the internet - most of the posts you find here will not be dipped in rainbows and sugar-coated. Magdlyn generously gave her time to inform you of the some very real risks that you had not considered before. I would think you would be more appreciative for having been given valuable information that could help inform the choices you make.
 
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