Does this count as Ethical Non Monogamy or Polyamory?

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whattodo14

New member
Hey all,

I have a quick question. I'm not one to put labels on anything, but I'm looking for an answer to help with further research.

Situation:
Partner and I are a married couple. Recently Partner has mentioned that she wants to have sex outside our marriage, since she didn't have many partners before we met. She thinks that if she explores herself sexually, it could make our sex life/relationship stronger. She does not intend to have any emotional attachments with these sexual partners. She says it will be a one-and-done type deal.

What would you call this type of relationship? Thanks in advance!
 
In my view its ENM. I feel its possible not to get emotionally attached...to a point. So far I have made some great friends who are or have been previous lovers. However, I am open to explore loving poly relationships too.

ENM within a pre-existing relationship can be wonderful, but a huge amount of understanding and communication is needed from both partners. What do you want from this?
 
whattodo14 said:
Hey all,

I have a quick question. I'm not one to put labels on anything, but I'm looking for an answer to help with further research.

Situation:
Partner and I are a married couple. Recently Partner has mentioned that she wants to have sex outside our marriage, since she didn't have many partners before we met. She thinks that if she explores herself sexually, it could make our sex life/relationship stronger. She does not intend to have any emotional attachments with these sexual partners. She says it will be a one-and-done type deal.

What would you call this type of relationship? Thanks in advance!
Click to expand...
I call it ethical non-monogamy, specifically, an open marriage, with intent for casual sex, or friends with benefits only. Most people think if a marriage is open for one partner, it should be open for both. Therefore, you should also have the right to play with others on a casual basis, if even you choose not to.

I would beware however, of feelings cropping up despite her intentions to only have one-night stands. Feelings tend to happen we have has sex with someone we are attracted to and enjoy spending time with.

Swingers try to prevent feelings happening by using certain techniques, which I could explain if you're curious.

This is a board for polyamory here, where the loving feelings come first and the sex is secondary. You might get more help on a board for swingers.
 
Humans, in general, tend to frequently fall in love with their sexual partners. Even if your wife thinks that won't happen, it might.
 
Hello whattodo14,

What you are describing is an ethical nonmonogamy situation. If your partner was going to fall in love with the people she had sex with, then it would move into the polyamory area. I hope this answers your question, let me know if I can be of any further help.

Regards,
Kevin T.
 
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