So hello everyone. My real is Brian. I'm 35 and married. My relationship with poly has been complex, rewarding, stressful, and pretty much any other emotion you can imagine. I have been poly for about 5 or 6 years.
So some history, I'll not be including new events or stuff. I'll include a line break if you want to skip this part. Anyhow, I first considered poly with my first marriage. I offered it to my then wife because I was her first. She didn't like that, cheated on me for years until I gave up and divorced her. Fast forward to the next woman, e. She was smart, funny, beyond gorgeous, and matched me sexually. A few years in she asks for poly. I agree. It started as sexual poly, but we all know after a year of sexual encounters someone is bound to catch feelings. I handled this poorly but for a newbie I was passable. The problem happened when I mentioned a girl I was interested in. E flipped out on me. Dictated that our poly was for her, and that I was to remain mono. Fighting and stuff happened. We returned to mono. She cheated, I forgave. We tried poly again, that ended with her loosing all contact with earth and spending a few days in inpatient mental health services. We waited a few years before trying again. I found the most incredible poly woman I ever met, and I started to fall in love. But my wife couldn't handle that. She ended the relationship right before Christmas. Eventually my wife warmed up some and so her and I tried again. It seemed perfect. Flawless. I felt important, valued, special. My wife had a boyfriend I also liked. (Sexually too even). But as typical E bulldozed through that guy and scarred him off. She was still ok with the other woman but could not handle me maintaining any platonic relationships. Needless to say I lost the girl, my friends, everyone but my wife. That was 4 months ago. This is the short short version and I left out alot of my screw up. I'll add them as time goes on
So why am I here? To learn a few coping mechanisms, and some communication skills. Plus I would like to "dip my toes" into the community.
So some history, I'll not be including new events or stuff. I'll include a line break if you want to skip this part. Anyhow, I first considered poly with my first marriage. I offered it to my then wife because I was her first. She didn't like that, cheated on me for years until I gave up and divorced her. Fast forward to the next woman, e. She was smart, funny, beyond gorgeous, and matched me sexually. A few years in she asks for poly. I agree. It started as sexual poly, but we all know after a year of sexual encounters someone is bound to catch feelings. I handled this poorly but for a newbie I was passable. The problem happened when I mentioned a girl I was interested in. E flipped out on me. Dictated that our poly was for her, and that I was to remain mono. Fighting and stuff happened. We returned to mono. She cheated, I forgave. We tried poly again, that ended with her loosing all contact with earth and spending a few days in inpatient mental health services. We waited a few years before trying again. I found the most incredible poly woman I ever met, and I started to fall in love. But my wife couldn't handle that. She ended the relationship right before Christmas. Eventually my wife warmed up some and so her and I tried again. It seemed perfect. Flawless. I felt important, valued, special. My wife had a boyfriend I also liked. (Sexually too even). But as typical E bulldozed through that guy and scarred him off. She was still ok with the other woman but could not handle me maintaining any platonic relationships. Needless to say I lost the girl, my friends, everyone but my wife. That was 4 months ago. This is the short short version and I left out alot of my screw up. I'll add them as time goes on
So why am I here? To learn a few coping mechanisms, and some communication skills. Plus I would like to "dip my toes" into the community.
