I have been reading about FLR relationships and I think it sounds really awesome. I want to hear from all of you. Ladies, do you take a lead role in your relationships? Guys, do any of you submit to your partners?
For the unintimated I will copy and paste some basic information. These guidelines were written by a marriage therapist and are not my own. Link below.
The Ultimate Beginner’s Guide to Female Led Relationships
I have been reading about this idea non stop for like, the last three nights in a row. I would like to approach my husband about allowing me to take control of the relationship. If anyone has had success in this model, I would love to hear more. And if you are on your path of being a relationship leader, please share what level your relationship falls under.
Level 1. Lower Female Control
This FLR level involves the least power differential. Both parties make nearly all decisions together, with the female taking control only in specific, previously agreed-on situations.
In some cases, couples decide to initiate an FLR, but transitioning to a power role is difficult for the woman. Asserting dominance may feel foreign and/or uncomfortable. Any hesitance often arises from societal expectations or the traditional male-female relationship dynamics these women witnessed growing up. It may take some time and encouragement for a woman to move from a passive to a dominant role.
It’s not uncommon for couples to shift to a higher level of female dominance once the woman’s comfort level increases.
Level 2. Moderate Female Control
When the woman takes on a more moderate level of control in the relationship, she’s typically more comfortable in her dominant role. She is generally the primary decision-maker. Men in this dynamic tend to enjoy taking on a more passive persona and prefer to be subservient in most areas of the relationship.
Although many couples are content to stay in a moderately female-controlled relationship, men who love to be dominated—and women who love to dominate—often up the ante by transitioning to a more formal level of the FLR. While sexual kinks are commonly explored at this level, the female isn’t necessarily “in charge” of the couple’s sex life, though her desires may be prioritized.
Level 3. Defined Control
In many ways, this higher level of the female led relationship is easier to establish and uphold. The woman commonly makes most decisions, taking on more of a traditional male role. Situations in which the man will take control are clearly communicated from the start.
In general, the male is submissive at this level, sometimes taking on a traditionally feminine role by staying home and/or taking care of the children. The female is typically the breadwinner, and both parties consider her the head of their household. In short, traditional gender roles are almost completely reversed.
Defined control FLRs are often more complex than relationships with lower dominance levels, as the female may take charge of the couple’s sex life. Most, though not all, of the kinks explored by the couple are based on the woman’s needs and desires. BDSM devices may come into play, along with other sexual exploration.
Level 4. Extreme Female Control/Immersion
Couples who enter into an extreme FLR are immersed in female domination and male submissiveness. The female takes complete control in the relationship, deciding how her partner spends his time and how finances are handled.
The male may act as a servant who is always ready and willing to submit to his partner. At this level, nearly—if not every—aspect of the male’s actions are dictated by the female. He’ll likely dress to please the woman and submit to her every desire, both inside and outside the home.
Sexually, every kink explored is based on the woman’s wants, needs, and desires. The couple may delve into hardcore BDSM. At the other extreme, the woman may require complete chastity from her partner. The man has little to no say in the relationship—or the bedroom. Previously agreed-on punishments can be a turn-on for both partners. As long as the dynamic is consensual, this extreme level of female dominance in a relationship can be successful.
For the unintimated I will copy and paste some basic information. These guidelines were written by a marriage therapist and are not my own. Link below.
The Ultimate Beginner’s Guide to Female Led Relationships
I have been reading about this idea non stop for like, the last three nights in a row. I would like to approach my husband about allowing me to take control of the relationship. If anyone has had success in this model, I would love to hear more. And if you are on your path of being a relationship leader, please share what level your relationship falls under.

Level 1. Lower Female Control
This FLR level involves the least power differential. Both parties make nearly all decisions together, with the female taking control only in specific, previously agreed-on situations.
In some cases, couples decide to initiate an FLR, but transitioning to a power role is difficult for the woman. Asserting dominance may feel foreign and/or uncomfortable. Any hesitance often arises from societal expectations or the traditional male-female relationship dynamics these women witnessed growing up. It may take some time and encouragement for a woman to move from a passive to a dominant role.
It’s not uncommon for couples to shift to a higher level of female dominance once the woman’s comfort level increases.
Level 2. Moderate Female Control
When the woman takes on a more moderate level of control in the relationship, she’s typically more comfortable in her dominant role. She is generally the primary decision-maker. Men in this dynamic tend to enjoy taking on a more passive persona and prefer to be subservient in most areas of the relationship.
Although many couples are content to stay in a moderately female-controlled relationship, men who love to be dominated—and women who love to dominate—often up the ante by transitioning to a more formal level of the FLR. While sexual kinks are commonly explored at this level, the female isn’t necessarily “in charge” of the couple’s sex life, though her desires may be prioritized.
Level 3. Defined Control
In many ways, this higher level of the female led relationship is easier to establish and uphold. The woman commonly makes most decisions, taking on more of a traditional male role. Situations in which the man will take control are clearly communicated from the start.
In general, the male is submissive at this level, sometimes taking on a traditionally feminine role by staying home and/or taking care of the children. The female is typically the breadwinner, and both parties consider her the head of their household. In short, traditional gender roles are almost completely reversed.
Defined control FLRs are often more complex than relationships with lower dominance levels, as the female may take charge of the couple’s sex life. Most, though not all, of the kinks explored by the couple are based on the woman’s needs and desires. BDSM devices may come into play, along with other sexual exploration.
Level 4. Extreme Female Control/Immersion
Couples who enter into an extreme FLR are immersed in female domination and male submissiveness. The female takes complete control in the relationship, deciding how her partner spends his time and how finances are handled.
The male may act as a servant who is always ready and willing to submit to his partner. At this level, nearly—if not every—aspect of the male’s actions are dictated by the female. He’ll likely dress to please the woman and submit to her every desire, both inside and outside the home.
Sexually, every kink explored is based on the woman’s wants, needs, and desires. The couple may delve into hardcore BDSM. At the other extreme, the woman may require complete chastity from her partner. The man has little to no say in the relationship—or the bedroom. Previously agreed-on punishments can be a turn-on for both partners. As long as the dynamic is consensual, this extreme level of female dominance in a relationship can be successful.