Hard rules thin the candidates VERY quickly. Let's see what we have to work with...
First, she needs to have more friends. Women to hang out with, go shopping, etc.
And she needs to start dating. And (IMO) date a lot, & a variety. You two seem to have a lot of preconceptions that are untested against Reality -- so, start testing. Let your s/o get some practical experience at figuring out what she wants rather than left-over Harlequin Romance nonsense.
If she goes obsessive with the first woman she hangs out with, then avoid believing it's a "one in a billion" thing -- that notion indicates only delusion. At best, latching onto an early date says "wow, I have really low standards, & am just hoping I get lucky!!"
And after maybe a year of getting out of the house & having some fun, your s/o will find a likely candidate for an actual relationship. The subject of physical intimacy might appear... & maybe it'll all end right there. That's the chance you take, particularly if you are dating rather than mate-shopping.
But there'll be some who express an interest in her. THEN the topic must be brought up that you HAVE to be there -- & I'm only guessing, but likely a "one-penis policy," too.
And at that point the ones committed to open relating are likely gone. If you get to the point of intimacy, the "new girl" might find herself not particularly turned on by one (maybe both) of you. Would you be okay without sex (maybe at all), or is this really whatthe two of you want & are just dolling it up with all the talk of Romance & friendship?
You say "her rule is nothing sexual without me". Is YOUR rule "nothing sexual without her"?