Greetings from ATX

[sideguy1981]

Hey y'all!

I've been married 18 years to a wonderful woman whom I love with all my heart. 12 years ago, she gave birth to our son who lives with severe disabilities including autism, cerebral palsy, and global developmental delay. He will always need full time care, and that is my purpose on this earth. Shortly after his birth, my wife's physical and mental health deteriorated and our sex life dwindled to a faint ember.

Well, with me out of the house going to work, and my wife's childcare duties picked up by Medicaid nurses, she had ample time to develop an online relationship with an old friend. Upon finding out, I was sad only that she didn't tell me sooner. There are no plans to separate, or sever our existing relationship in any way. We have had many compassionate conversations about what we want for ourselves and each other, all ending in laughs and hugs.

Now I, a full-time semiconductor engineer, housekeeper, cook, anddiaper changer extraordinaire, have been encouraged to seek sexual partners outside our home, explore what gives me pleasure, and develop friendships and relationships that fulfill me. I'm starting to navigate the dating world, but haven't had much luck so far. I'm here for advice and camaraderie with fellow explorers.

Ask me anything, I'm generally an open book!

 

[kdt26417]

Greetings sideguy1981,
Welcome to our forum. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.

You certainly seem to have a challenging situation, and you are just on the threshold of some exciting new poly prospects. Have patience, it usually takes a long time to find someone new to date; in the meantime, spend some time reading and posting on our various threads and boards. Let us know if you have any questions. I guess my only question for now is, is your wife still developing an online relationship with the old friend? How do you feel about that? I take it the old friend lives a long ways away?

Sincerely,
Kevin T., "official greeter"

Notes:

There's a *lot* of good info in Golden Nuggets. Have a look!

Please read through the guidelines if you haven't already.

Note: You needn't read every reply to your posts, especially if someone posts in a disagreeable way. Given the size and scope of the site it's hard not to run into the occasional disagreeable person. Please contact the mods if you do (or if you see any spam), and you can block the person if you want.

If you have any questions about the board itself, please private-message a mod and they'll do their best to help.

Welcome aboard!

 

[sideguy1981]

Greetings sideguy1981,
Welcome to our forum. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.

You certainly seem to have a challenging situation, and you are just on the threshold of some exciting new poly prospects. Have patience, it usually takes a long time to find someone new to date; in the meantime, spend some time reading and posting on our various threads and boards. Let us know if you have any questions. I guess my only question for now is, is your wife still developing an online relationship with the old friend? How do you feel about that? I take it the old friend lives a long ways away?

Sincerely,
Kevin T., "official greeter"

Notes:

There's a *lot* of good info in Golden Nuggets. Have a look!

Please read through the guidelines if you haven't already.

Note: You needn't read every reply to your posts, especially if someone posts in a disagreeable way. Given the size and scope of the site it's hard not to run into the occasional disagreeable person. Please contact the mods if you do (or if you see any spam), and you can block the person if you want.

If you have any questions about the board itself, please private-message a mod and they'll do their best to help.

Welcome aboard!

Hey Kevin,

My wife is still developing the relationship with the other guy. The way I feel about it, after much thought, is that I want her to be happy. If we ended up separated because she falls in love and decides to leave, I would be glad to let her go. Women. Are. Not. Property. I have no illusions of ownership but feel gratitude for the relationship we've built, the lessons I have learned, and the friendship and companionship she has blessed me with. Right now, I'm focused on figuring out what I need, learning how and how not to converse with other women, and managing my expectations. I'm excited for the future whatever it brings.

 

[kdt26417]

You have a good perspective, women are not things, that can be owned, you are letting her enjoy her freedom and she is doing the same for you. This is the best way to approach polyamory.