Hello again

Fidelia

New member
Hello, friends and friends I haven't met yet:

I've been MIA from the boards for a rather long time. When I joined, lo these many years ago now, I was a was nervous wife looking for a way forward with my Beloved Husband, who was also deeply smitten with my friend. With love, care and concern for all parties, and with an excruciating amount of TALK - TALK - TALK - TALK- TALK - TALK - TALK! we found a way for the three of us to move forward.

When I stopped coming by, it was because my Beloved was diagnosed with cancer, and the battle consumed us entirely.

No one ever fought harder. We left no stone unturned in the quest to vanquish that dread foe. But cancer is a fiercesome enemy, and eventually my Beloved had to travel beyond the Veil.

My friend and my Beloved' s girlfriend helped and supported us in the fight as much as she could. But cancer is horrible and hideous and not everyone can stand the sight and smell of it, even for the sake of love. She stopped communicating with me sometime after he passed. It hurt. But I understand and accept her choice. With all my heart I wish her well, whenever she is and whatever she's doing.

Time has passed now. The hole in my heart that my Beloved left when he crossed over is still there, and always will be, but somehow my heart has healed around it, if that makes sense. No one could ever take his place. I miss him every minute and always will. But somehow, after all the time that's passed, and everything that's happened, I know now that I'm okay. And I will be okay. And it's time to move forward again.

I've had plenty of time to contemplate life, and I've decided that of I'm ever going to be who I really am, I had better be about it. Because life is short and you never know when your time in the sun will be over. At the moment, I am a happy, healthy human beingand life is good.

That's why I'm here now. No expectations other than sharing experiences with all of you. Meeting new people, maybe running into some old friends, who knows?

Life is funny and weird and there is just no predicting where it might take you. When I first showed up here, I was a middle-class housewife; now I'm a middle-aged unicorn. Who would have ever seen THAT coming?
 
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Welcome back to the Forum - with sincerest sympathies for your loss, but also good to hear of your healing. I look forward to hearing of your continuing poly journey. Al
 
Greetings Fidelia,
Welcome back. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.

I'm very sorry to hear about your loss. Like you said, the heart may heal over but deep within the hole remains. I lost my wife in 2013 (Alzheimer's), so I know how much it can ache. I'm glad you're back with us, I believe you'll make some new friends and meet some old friends.

Sincerely,
Kevin T., "official greeter"

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Welcome aboard!
 
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