Hi from Texas

A

austinbabybear

New member
Hi from Texas!
My name is Scott and I am a 49 year old gay man that lives in Austin Texas.

I found this thread while researching on polyamory. I am currently dating a man that is also dating other men and thinks that he is poly. I am not sure if I am or not but I am willing to learn and see if poly is for me. I am having some difficulty with it but we are working it out.

This group and thread seems to be very informative for me and all members seem very friendly, but it seems that most of group is straight. I know that sexual orientation does not matter when it comes to poly, but I would really appreciate it if there are any gay men out there that are poly that I could communicate with or at least ask questions to. I also appreciate any communication with anyone who is willing to help.

I will be posting and asking some questions later but just wanted to at least introduce myself and put that out there.

Peace and Love,
Scott
 
Hi, and welcome. :)

Being poly and LGBT makes you a minority within a minority, so that's kind of to be expected to some extent. However, I do think that this forum is rather under-represented by men in general, regardless of sexuality. There are a few gay and bisexual guys who post fairly regularly though, so hopefully some of them will come and say hello.

I think it's great that you are coming to this with an open mind and wanting to explore. There are so many different ways that people can organise their relationships. Although a lot of books and the like are written from the perspective that everyone involved in a polyamorous relationship are themselves poly, that's not always the case. In my own case, I tend to lean more towards monogamy in terms of my romantic feelings, but nevertheless, I am happy to be in a relationship where my partners are free to have romantic connections with others. You could say I'm mono-amorous (tend to love one person at a time) but polysexual (enjoy having multiple sexual partners). Whether you decide you are or are not polyamorous yourself, whether you decide you want the relationship to be sexually open at your end or closed, as long as your partner being polyamorous isn't working to the detriment of your own connection with him (and importantly, to your sense of self), then I see no reason why this can't be a great relationship.
 
Going to start by saying that tone does not convey, and asking that you take this in the most gentle, respectful, and...curious...tone, possible. Please.

I get a sense from your post that I have gotten with other minority group members in the past (racial minorities and others) that says...yes, you all seem very nice. But there is no one (or not many) here who are really like me. I strongly prefer to talk to people who are all (or mostly, or more) like me, and would rather not talk to those who aren't. I am fairly certain that someone who is not like me (part of my group) couldn't understand where I come from or how I feel.

Personally I find this a little bit sad, because I want to embrace and include all people in my world. I do my very best not to make assumptions about others who are different from me, to hear them out and meet them on a human level, and try to find the common ground that inevitably does exist.

I promise you that, although you will find that most here are not gay men, you will be treated with exactly the respect and consideration as any poster. And you will find some very, very good human advice and conversation, of the kind that helps with healthy self exploration and positive relating skills. Concepts that easily cross boundaries of gender and orientation, if you are willing to hear the voices of people who aren't part of your group.

We would love to hear your voice here.

Welcome.
 
Greetings Scott,
Welcome to our forum. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.

I can't think of the usernames of our other gay men here, but I know we have some. Actually I would say a lot of the people here are bi. Whether that's in greater number than the straight people, I don't know.

If I can help, I will. Post the questions that you have.

Sincerely,
Kevin T., "official greeter" :)

Notes:

There's a *lot* of good info in Golden Nuggets. Have a look!

Please read through the guidelines if you haven't already.

Note: You needn't read every reply to your posts, especially if someone posts in a disagreeable way. Given the size and scope of the site it's hard not to run into the occasional disagreeable person. Please contact the mods if you do (or if you see any spam), and you can block the person if you want.

If you have any questions about the board itself, please private-message a mod and they'll do their best to help.

Welcome aboard!
 
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