H'ok So.....

Hey. So there is a trick you should know if you are into strap on stuff. I am sure I've shared it somewhere on this site, and maybe you already know about it (??) but I will put it here in case you don't. Because holy moly it's super handy to know. Everyone should know this, so I don't mind being repetitive if I've already shared it...

***

Midori's scarf harness. Good for the affixing of any sort of strap on thingie with a flanged base, or even a Hitachi wand...basically anything you want to put THERE.

You need 2 scarves. The light gauzy ones work well. Or anything like strips of cloth (tear up a sheet, it doesn't matter.) Length of each one should be approx 1.5 times the circumference of your waist.

Take Scarf 1, and tie a basic over-under knot in the very middle of it. Leave it un-tightened so there is an open loop to work with in the middle of the scarf.

Take Scarf 2, and thrust it into that open loop, so that the middle of scarf 2 is now in the hole and the halves hanging down. Don't tighten the knot yet.

Take your toy of choice and put it into the hole in the un-tightened knot in Scarf 1. Now you pull both ends of Scarf 1 to tighten it up, so it holds the toy and Scarf 2.

Those ends you just pulled, take them (Scarf 1) and tie them snugly around your waist. You can tie the knot in front if reaching around to your back is uncomfortable, but once you've done you'll need to scoot it around so the knot is in back, or you can just tie it in the back in the first place. So you'll have the ends of Scarf 1 tied behind you, and the toy hanging in front, and the ends of Scarf 2 hanging down by the toy now.

Take one end of Scarf 2, and thrust it under your left leg (between your legs), run it under your left buttock and then pull it back around your hip to the front. Tie it to the "belt" part of Scarf 1, right where a change pocket on a pair of jeans would be.

(During these steps, you adjust and position the toy as desired.)

Do the same with the other dangling end of Scarf 2, under your right leg, under the right buttock, around the right hip and tie to the "belt" where a change pocket would be.

Viola!! And scarves are super cheap, easy to wash (compared especially to many purpose made harnesses) and this is adjustable to any body shape or size.

***
 
Hmm, I tried the scarf thing once and didn't love it. For quick to put on, easy to wash, and quite secure, I just picked up a Rodeoh panty/harness thing and it's awesome (already had a feeldoe, and while the concept is great, I have damn good kegels and it's still not quite enough).
 
Oooo, I definitely don't remember reading this anywhere. I'll have to try it out. And you find that the scarf knot actually holds the toy well? I must say I'm kinda surprised by that. But I guess if you're tying everything tight enough, then it shouldn't really have that much slip to it.

I did at least buy a fairly cheap harness that was machine washable this time around since it was a first time thing. I never like the idea of dropping big money on a first time toy that I'm experimenting with. I do like the idea of just being more creative with the use of scarves and other tying things though. Thanks for this!
 
I've had to fool about with it a number of times to really get it how I wanted it, and I'd expect "ymmv" especially with different toys... But it's one of those things you can easily fiddle with and adjust to suit your needs, I like it mostly because it's so flexible.

As for holding toys, well when I use it with a Hitachi for myself I am fastening behind the head and it holds it firmly in place (though I feel ridiculous with it just sticking out there...) Dude.

Dude.

Wait.

So... I have a smaller battery op Hitachi knockoff wand. Supposing I got a jelly style dong thing and hollowed it and managed somehow to stick it over the non-business end (handle) of the wand...? WHY has no one yet made/marketed something like this...or have they? Sorry, I'm getting all excited about this idea. I could really do cool stuff with this...

But anyhow, yes I have found that it holds toys in place well. The only thing is, it's got to have some sort of flange or something to the base of it, because it's held firmly against your body but if it is like a standard issue vibe with no um..."balls"...(? lol)...it would just fall out forward. If that makes sense?

We had a whole class of like 40-50 people doing this at Thunder. Several of the men used the technique to affix the "stunt dicks" (purple rubber dongs) to their foreheads and chins. It was hilarious. Also, Midori is awesome and if you ever have a chance to go to any event she is involved in...do it.
 
I just had a hot chocolate revelation a few moments ago at my work desk. Ok, so I hate coffee and everything about it, but I love chocolate, so clearly this means my hot beverage of choice is hot chocolate. I can drink it year round the way people drink coffee and I usually have a cup of either hot chocolate or tea on any given morning at work. Well, I don't want to cart milk into work, so that means that when in the office, I'm usually having the hot chocolate that you mix with water. Sure, it's not as good, but fewer calories and the convenience make it worth it. Well, because my logic during weight loss was that every carb counts, I was buying the no sugar added version of hot chocolate to boot. It still tasted fine and I enjoyed it, and it saved me some calories and carbs (or so I thought!) so I've been rolling with that MOST of the time for years now. Well I was at the store the other day and they didn't have the tubs of no sugar added cocoa, and I don't buy the box of packets because I go through them too fast, so I just sucked it up and bought the regular kind. I remember looking at the container and seeing that the calories and carbs didn't seem that bad, so screw it. When I later compared them side by side, it was 5 more calories and 1 more gram of carbs, big whoopee.

Well this morning I used the last of the no sugar added mix and it wasn't enough for a full to-go type thermos/mug, so I opened the regular and added some, making it a mixture. Holy cow! The first sip had a NOTICABLY different taste! It's significantly better! I mean, ok, I have always known that what I was drinking wasn't great quality, but I attributed that to the fact that it was the version with water vs milk. I didn't realize that the no sugar added still had such a large impact beyond that. GAME. CHANGER. I can only imagine that it will get better next time when the whole cup is made entirely with the regular sugar version.

As I'm sure I've said before on this blog.... it's the little things in life!

My happiness over hot chocolate is also helping to counteract the fact that my teeth are slowly starting to feel more and more sore after swapping out my invisalign trays this morning. I don't think this will be a terrible tray, but the first day or so still always leaves my teeth feeling tender. Luckily this is the first of 3 final finishing trays on my bottom teeth, and I think I have maybe only 1 more tray on top before I move into the final 3 finishing trays (maybe 2?). I'm actually a bit surprised that I only have so few trays left on the bottom since 1 tooth is still a tad crooked. I'm really hoping that with this tray I'm wearing now I see some correction or I might touch base with my dentist. I don't want to go through 2 more trays if she's going to decide that I need some additional adjustments and I can start that process sooner.
 
I wonder if there is some kind of artificial sweetener (in place of sugar) that is added to that "no sugar added" version? Like I am not convinced that some of those artificial sweeteners they use are any better, y'know?
 
Oh there is definitely artificial sweetener in it. I generally don't mind consuming the artificial stuff since at the end of the day, carbs are what kick me in the butt. Some people just don't like the taste of the artificial stuff though and it has never bothered me. I just am surprised that for hot chocolate it appears to make a noticeable difference. Not even just in the taste either. The drink just feels smoother and creamier in a way!
 
Sugar does some interesting things when heated - it's probably the same reason why, if you're a Southerner, iced tea that was sweetened cold doesn't taste right compared to iced tea that was sweetened hot - there's a mouthfeel to dissolved sugar. I bet cocoa is the same...
 
Another great weekend! Thurs I had book club after work, which I always enjoy, even if I don't like the book. I did like the book this time though and we've actually had a few good ones in a row. I've been reading a handful of books a month currently! Our Dec book is Mystic River, because Dec is always a book that has been made into a movie and we do a potluck and watch the movie. Looking forward to that one!

This weekend Sudo and I had no plans whatsoever. Yay! I stayed in a bath robe basically all weekend and got cuddled and slightly pampered. I mentioned that I wanted steak at some point, so Sudo cooked me a steak. He also chilled a bottle of wine for me and kept my wine glass topped off all Saturday. On top of that, he fixed his little media server that he uses to host movies and shows for us to watch and asked what movies or porn I wanted downloaded. ha! I don't remember how it came up but we've been joking about him needing to download me a porn movie. So he actually did! It was Magic Mike XXXL and wow, it was soooooooo bad. The acting was terrible, the dancing was terrible. The sex scenes... I've seen better on free porn sites! We didn't get anywhere near finishing it since it was like 3 hours long. I gave up 2 sex scenes in and went and had real sex. If anything, I was making comments like "oh, I like her panties! She has a nice bra!" lol. The only plus was that all the dudes were wearing condoms, so in my mind I was thinking... good for you production company for caring about the health of the actors.

The point of the story is really just that Sudo did nice things for me and it was just very sweet.

On Sunday, we spent a bunch of time going through his budget. He's always kept a very high level budget, but since he and Peach started tracking their finances separately on Sept 1st, his is also in way more detail to match hers, but he hadn't updated it in forever. So I was helping him with that (reading figures from one window so he could type into spreadsheets). The goal was just that I wanted to have a better handle on what his expenses were and how much extra income he had each month compared to me and what position that would put us in for future house. Plus, wanting to know how much he would expect to have in savings to go toward a downpayment. Of course, their budgets are tracked together in a shared spreadsheet with separate columns since some things are still together. i.e. when one of them buys groceries, they just log it for each of them as half of the expense. Anyway, what we discovered is that it looks like Peach was saving her receipts to track her spending.... but she wasn't checking that against actual bank and credit card charges, so there were just a bunch of expenses that were being missed. We were both shocked, but also bummed because she probably thinks that she's been doing a pretty good job, when in reality, she spent a little more than she made one month and only a little less than she made the other month. Of course, I think she'll be ok once she realizes what has been happening. And she also is just eating out way too much buying lunches and morning coffees and such and could save a ton more money if need be. Expenses like that are things that she likely won't have once she moves, so I don't think it's disastrous! But it's probably going to bum her out. Lessons to be learned though. And frankly, for someone who has never budgeted ever in their entire life, she is at least learning. So now she'll at least understand why she can't only rely on receipts, etc. Baby steps. Plus, hopefully some of her larger one-time expenses associated with moving are largely over since she helped pay for painting and other things to get rooms moved around and an office set up at Joe's.

The plus side to this was that we found all this out NOW so that she still has 2 months to continue to adjust her budget accordingly. But also, looking at Sudo's budget, he actually spends several thousand dollars a month less than what he makes. YAY! I mean, his housing costs are stupidly cheap with he and Peach sharing a mortgage and RCT renting from them, so no wonder he has so much extra money. But at least that means that it really will be pretty easy for him to afford what we're looking at paying monthly for a new house. Plus, he is going to have more in savings to put toward a down payment than we had originally guessed! And I'll have more than I thought now that I'm planning to cash out my life insurance policy to switch to a term one. I think between that and whatever RCT can contribute, we might have enough to make it worth asking a family member for a loan to get us to the point of putting down 20%. That would get rid of several hundred dollars a month in PMI (which would just go toward payments to pay back the family loan, which I would expect we'd be paying back in short order otherwise we wouldn't ask). We might not go that route, but it's at least an option.

Anyway, all of it gets me excited for house hunting! I think in Dec Sudo and Peach will get their house appraised (we're pretty sure it's under water enough that they need to rent it out). Sudo and I will also meet with a tax/law professional to figure out the best way to deal with me and him buying a place when he and Peach are only separated and not divorced (though I believe they will at least be legally separated, paperwork and all). Sudo and I will also begin the house hunt in earnest and touch base with a realtor, etc. I can't believe this is all finally happening!!
 
Voted on my way to work this morning since the voting location is only 2 blocks from my apt. The line wasn't horrendous and at least was still indoors, but it still took almost an hour between the line and actual voting. Now it's just a waiting game to see what happens.... I wait anxiously!

Last night I had a second date with new OKC guy. He came to my place and we'd previously agreed at my request that it was just going to be a hangout night, clothes staying on. Well that ended up not happening! Clothes came off. No actual penetrative sex, but he did some yummy things to me. Fortunately he was ok with me not reciprocating since I didn't really want to go that far without having a convo with Sudo and Mr. Hyde, especially since I'd already told Sudo that I wasn't planning to have sexy times. On top of that, we haven't fully had the whole testing discussion, so I didn't really want to be giving oral and such. So that will have to happen asap! Still not really sure where I expect things to go here, but I'm enjoying just having fun. I dunno that this will progress to any sort of full blown relationship or just be more like a FWB. Right now, from a time, and other things standpoint, I think FWB is all I really am looking for, and based on conversations I've had with him, I think he's thinking the same thing. As it is, I'm hoping that I don't get a couple of dates and hook-ups in and then decide that it's just too exhausting to handle in my schedule.

Meanwhile, Sudo apparently had a bad night because Peach was super pissed that he changed her side of the budget spreadsheet and she didn't agree with stuff.... sigh. I mean, he purposefully highlighted anything he did on her side so that she could see it, double check it, and update it if she thought it was wrong or so they could discuss. If she doesn't want help, there's only so much Sudo can do and she'll just have to learn the hard way. I will continue to just be the observer to the shit show that is people separating.... blargh.
 
I know everyone else is saying it too, but just.... wow.

Already a poly women group I'm in on FB has women discussing and spreading the word that many are considering long term BC like Mirena in case laws are changed and BC is no longer covered by insurance. They're talking about buying Plan B and keeping it in stock to be able to offer other women that need it in case it stops being OTC (discussions were going regarding shelf life). People are even sharing links on what else they can do and actions they can take to help with social justice/causes and even asking about career changes in ways that would help.

I myself haven't had the visceral reaction that many have. It's been more like "WTF? Seriously?!" But I also know I won't feel the same impact as many. Women's issues will directly impact me, but my health insurance covered BC even before the AMA, I live in a liberal, democratic city, and I'm not a minority in terms of race or religion. I have plenty of friends though that DO have to worry about all of those things, and I can't even imagine what that's like.

I'll tell you one thing, I am getting the hell out of this city during inauguration! This place already sucks during any regular inauguration because of the insane influx of tourists, but if they're all Trump supporters? Well, I'll just take a long weekend and go rent a cabin and not turn on the TV or something.
 
I have friends that are talking about going to DC for the inauguration. Nutters. No fucking way. Where I live is too close, and we're an hour and a half out. Noping right out of that idea!
 
Another weekend of not making plans and keeping it low key. It feels so good!

Just lounging around at Sudo's place feels so nice! We did do some errand running to grocery shop and sunday night we cooked some food together, plus we went out to lunch earlier in the day. Being all domestic with him just gives me the warm fuzzies :)

RCT will finally be home at the end of this week after weeks of back to back trips for both work and his personal life. Once that happens the 3 of us are going to sit down and talk more house stuff. Apparently Peach was saying that he was a bit frustrated that we were talking about a sooner moving time frame than he was thinking. I think maybe there's more miscommunications going on, since we want to START looking in Dec/Jan, but were assuming that it would very likely be a several months long process between searching, finding something, closing, etc. I think he's hoping to manage something around June, but let's be real, depending on the market, you can't always find a house in some exact timeline. Plus, I think he's worried about having to move when he's going to be busy traveling, but most of his crap is already boxed and in storage, and we'd be happy to have movers move his stuff without him present if he's ok with that. I was having this convo with Sudo and I was like "if you think we're moving without the help of movers when we have a full townhouse, a full 1 BR apartment, and a full storage unit to condense into 1 larger house, you're fucking crazy, and you can do that without me!" haha. I moved myself from my college town into the 3rd story room of a shared group house when I moved to my city and it sucked ass. So when I moved out I paid for movers and it was worth every penny. I'll never again move without movers!

Tonight I am dead set on getting the insulation cut to size and installed on Leonida's cage. I've been procrastinating on it for a while, but it gets dang gold in my bedroom and I need to make sure he's warm. Granted, there is still a regulated heat mat keeping his bedding warm and there's a light with a timer during the day, but I just want to make sure that he's good to go and I'm a good snake mom!
 
Some good things happening and then also some self-reflections needed.

The good things, Sudo is spending this entire weekend at my place for the first time in quite some time. It will be nice to spend the whole weekend in my own apartment and not at someone else's place! I really can't wait for us to all move and limit the back and forth.

A friend of mine that lives 2-3 hours north of here (depending on traffic) has been job hunting and it just so happens that he works in IT and Sudo was looking to fill an IT position at his work. I passed along the job add and my friend applied and after going through an online test and several rounds of interviews, he actually got the job! Yes, sudo was aware that he was my friend, but all 3 of us discussed NUMEROUS times throughout that the decision would be made entirely on qualifications/experience/skills/etc. They had never met before so Sudo made it a point to stay as impartial as possible. Plus, he wasn't the only one involved in the interview/decision making process and all of the other interviewers agreed. So I'm feeling pretty pumped that I was able to help a friend out, but also that no one has to feel like they did anything unfairly. Plus, Sudo has been CRAZY stressed at work due to not having enough staff and then on top of that having to take out time to deal with the hiring crap. So now that all of that mess is over and my friend will start in the next 2ish weeks, Sudo can focus on his other work and I'm hoping things will calm down. He's been REALLY struggling lately between the separation with Peach and her being unhappy about some stuff, work stress, and his ongoing efforts to work through his issues with me dating (which more has to do with the fact that it highlights for him how unsuccessful the rest of his romantic life has been outside of our relationship). Anyway, he's been in need of something calming down and going right, and I'm hoping some reduced work stress will be that thing.

In other news, I had drinks with a guy that I went on a date like, eh, a year ago? Way back when, he and I met on OKC, his wife and he were new to opening up, we went on a date, really connected, and she flipped out, so he backed off. Meh, I knew it was a risk so I didn't take it badly. We've every so often checked in to say that we hope life was good (mainly he has messaged me to that effect and I responded politely in kind). Well he and his wife are now separating and divorcing, he touched base again, and I said I could do a friendly hang-out but wasn't really up for dating. To complicated, I'm seeing people, and just.... it seems like a disaster waiting to happen. Anyway, so we had drinks and dessert Wed night and had some great conversation. At the end of the night he was nice enough to drive me home so I didn't have to metro, but then he kissed me good-night, and like an idiot I kissed back. I am seriously the worst at saying no! I mean, it's not like I was hating it or anything, I just knew that I couldn't offer him what he wants. I called it a night, hopped out of the car, and I talked to him about it the next day and was like "Yeah, I can hang out and be friends and be supportive... but I wasn't expecting the kiss, and I just can't go there and don't want to lead you on." He was understanding and said that just keeping it friendly is fine.

Part of it is that I JUST started dating a 3rd guy (even if on a more casual basis) and frankly, even that guy I'm having a hard time mustering the desire to do anything with it. I've made zero effort to plan a 3rd date with that guy. And while this other guy is nice and fun and we get along, I've got enough feels that are holding me back that I just can't even go there.

I'm really struggling with figuring out what the hell it is that I want. I enjoy meeting and dating new people. I enjoy the sexual variety and the sexual freedom, but then there's the time constraints and the fact that when I DO try to add more people I end up feeling like I'm so busy that I'm just exhausted all the time. A friend asked WHY I felt like I wanted to date more people, and the answer isn't that I feel like I have needs that aren't being met or anything so serious.... it's just fun. After a lifetime of being fat and feeling unattractive, I LIKE the attention, I LIKE the sex. I just wanna enjoy all the things! But damnit there are only 24 hours in a day and 7 days in a week and most of that time is spent sleeping and working, and the bit I have left largely already goes to Sudo, Mr. Hyde, family, and whatever other social plans are on the agenda. Then after that, the nights I do spend on my own at home, I'm usually in need of just reading a book and passing out at 9:30 on the couch.... like I did last night.

Things to ponder....
 
Such a lovely weekend with Sudo. I seriously can't wait to marry this man! We didn't even do anything special or unusual, I just love the domestic bliss that we live in when we're together.

I wrote in a previous entry that I was dead set on getting some winter insulation set up on the snake cage earlier this week and it totally didn't happen, but Sudo helped me with it over the weekend and we did it as a team effort. We cooked and cleaned together, watched some shows, talked about relationshippy stuff, house stuff, etc. and had some delicious sex! Oh, and I actually made Sudo call yellow for the first time EVER! I was pretty pleased with myself.

Stupid computer is forcing me to reboot.... to be continued.
 
So where was I....

Right, being all lovey dovey over Sudo! Basically, he's the bee's knees. Even if he did threaten to push me out of bed, kill me in my sleep, and say that he was "done with me." LOL. All lovingly of course, and probably after I did something like shove his face into a pillow or put my ice-cold hands on his back.

Funny coincidence of timing, I was talking to a friend on.... Friday? and he was joking that Sudo needs to hurry up and propose to me and all, but later that night when we were on the couch watching TV and he was messing with stuff on his computer I looked over and he had a ring website up! I was like "oh hey, what's this?! :D" So I spent some time pointing at various rings being like "this is pretty, hate that, that one's nice, oooooh look at that one, ew that one is hideous." And joking with Sudo that he can't just whip a ring out of his pocket one night on the couch in our sweats and ask me to marry him or I'm going to tell him to try again, and teasing him about the number of paychecks that should appropriately cover an engagement ring (this is relevant since his work JUST changed from bi-weekly pay to monthly pay so a single paycheck is now HUGE and I joked that the same number still applied). Anyway, it was a fun time just being able to tease and poke at each other, but also both feel so completely comfortable in the knowledge that we both really want to marry each other.

Sunday, I did ditch Sudo at home for a few hours and went to a ladies poly brunch that was down the road from my place. It was great and I ended up spending most of the time talking to the 3 ladies sitting directly around me at my end of the long table. It turned out that we were all into kink and were all either switches or tops, so we had lots of laughs talking about beating on our respective bottoms, comparing tools, and eventually exchanging info and discussing the need for a ladies who are tops brunch, possibly even at the home of one of the ladies who has a bottom that would even enjoy allowing us to test out some equipment on her while we ooo and ahhhh over the top's collection of things. Sweet! Frankly, it's always nice to talk to more women who top since it gives me some great ideas and I think will help me learn and improve my own skills. I would love to be a better top and Domme to Sudo, and I *AM* getting better. It's fun to just even see my own growth as I figure out what things I like to do and try out and how he responds to them.

I also just had my first experience with learning a lesson about quality toys. We bought a set of SUPER cheap canes off of etsy since it was a new thing so I wanted to see if we'd enjoy that type of impact before spending a bunch of money. They were actually working out really well.... but my middle one that I use the most (though still not that many times since they're new) snapped during play last night. I wasn't even using it that hard! The last 6-8 inches of the thing just snapped clean off, no splintering or nothing. On the plus side, I just used it to my advantage and took it out on Sudo for "breaking my new toy." Muahahahaha.

In other news, another date/play night with Mr. Hyde tonight, so that should be fun. I've also still been fading out convo with the OKC guy. I just.... blah. I probably should just man up and say that I'm not interested and end it, but he seems to be doing the same thing so I'm happy to just let it ride this course. I've also still been talking to other drinks guy that I saw last week, let's call him Ref (since for fun he refs high school and college football games). DEFINITELY this thing is has to stay at a friends level. We talk enough about his divorce and what's going on with that and I am NOT willing to deal with that level of drama. Having 1 partner that is going through a separation and divorce (albeit amicably) is plenty. I have zero interest in propping up someone else while they go through the high's and lows of a much more tumultuous separation and divorce, AND has 3 kids to manage through it all, etc. etc. Nope, nope, nope. (not to say that I feel at all like I'm propping up Sudo, though I do try to be supportive... but as I noted, his separation is amicable and doesn't have that level of drama!) A text convo this morning about the drama from Ref's weekend was yet another reminder of why I was glad to have stopped at the kiss and been like "hey, you're a nice guy, but I can't do this right now."

Frankly, with the move stuff happening in the next 3-6 months and everything else, I think I just can't really picture how it's worth it to start anything with anyone right now. I'm happy with my 2 guys right now and need to just remind myself that just because there are people out there that want to date me, that doesn't mean I need to be all "oooo, shiny!" and get myself caught up in shit that I'm going to end up being over rather quickly. Maybe I just need to sleep with someone for fun and get it out of my system :p Hell, maybe I'm just a slut (in a sex-positive way). Obviously I'm not getting very far in terms of thinking all this stuff out, huh??
 
So another yummy night with Mr. Hyde in the bag. We did talk briefly about all of the upcoming changes in my life, namely, the plan to move and combine houses. I was hesitant in case I didn't like the answer, but a screwed up the nerve to ask if me moving to the area that we're looking in would be a problem for him since it would be a longer drive for Mr. Hyde to come over. He said that it shouldn't be a problem though. He also has an airBnB unit right around the corner from his house and said that if need be he can occasionally block off a night so that we can use that. He's not even sure what's going to happen with that since cities and states are starting to crack down on short term rentals because of the hotel industry lobbying so hard against things like airbnb. So if they can't keep using it as that, he said they might even just turn it into a kink space and use it for that and rent it out for that.... so not a "hotel" rental... more like furniture/equipment rental that you happen to get overnight. LOL.

Of course, the other big question was whether it would be an issue for him to now come to see me if I was in a shared home with Sudo, which would mean that Sudo might also be home. I explained that for me it's a pretty big need to have some room separation, so ideally the guest/play room is going to be in the basement and other bedrooms will be on other levels of the house, so the guys won't have to be all up in each other's business. And we'd be taking whatever measures are needed to make sure that all the bedrooms are properly insulated for noise control too. He said that although that's not really a situation that he's dealt with before, he's not really worried about it. He did ask how Sudo felt and I was honest and said that Sudo and I both are of the understanding that combining households is only going to work if we're ok with each other being able to have other partners over, so it should be fine. I told him that Sudo *does* have some feels about the D/s thing, but that it's nothing personal about Mr. Hyde and more about the dynamic in general, but that Sudo also knows that they're his feels to manage and isn't asking me to change anything. I didn't go into detail because that's Sudo's business. But it does potentially impact Mr. Hyde if they're going to be in the same space in the future, so I felt he deserved honesty. Plus, I know that he can sympathize because he's owned up to having to face and manage his own jealousy before when it comes to his wife and some of her partners. I don't really know any more detail than that, which is fine with me. It's their business, but it also helps to humanize him so that I can see that he deals with all the feels too.

So basically, I know there will be some growing pains once Sudo and I co-habitate, and that he'll have to adjust to being in the same space when I have a partner over and I'll have to adjust to the same when he has a romantic partner over (seeing as he and Peach haven't really been romantic partners for a while, plus, any new partner is still an adjustment). But I'm feeling optimistic about it. Plus, we'll be spending more time with each other outside of those instances and also just be able to reconnect sooner in the sense that we might not have additional days in between those date days and when we're together again. Plus, I just am ready to finally live with Sudo and be domestic ALL THE TIME with him! And I want my dungeon so I can torture him to a blissful oblivion :p
 
Such a nice Thanksgiving break! I really needed those few extra days off work. My head just wasn't in it!

Wed night I packed up and went to Sudo's for the long weekend. We did a little food prep that evening and the next day and then had a lovely Thanksgiving meal as a polycule with me, Sudo, Peach, Joe, and RCT. RCT fried a turkey, and we made all sorts of other stuff. Yum! So then Friday morning Peach and Joe left to head down to his place and Peach will be there until Wed. She took the dogs with her for that trip, which was nice since it means that Sudo came back with my to my apt last night and will be there until Wed and we won't have to worry about someone being home at his place for the dogs.

Sat, I took Sudo up to my mom's house and we did my family Thanksgiving with my brother, sis-in-law, and my grandfather. Of course, we were sent home with a bunch of leftovers to add to the ones we already had, so now we have soooo much food! Good thing the only repeat items between the meals were turkey.

Sudo got to fly his drone up at my mom's too, so he was pretty pleased about that. Sadly most of the parks around him don't allow drone flying and then being so close to DC also means more restricted areas. Not a problem further north at my mom's place!

We also had more talks about both Peach's move down to Joe's as well as the rest of us having the eventual move into a new home purchase. Peach has been planning for a while to move the weekend of Jan 14th (my birthday weekend as well), but between now and then she's been trying to take some things down in car loads when she's already going to Joe's place. She's really not taking that much of the shared stuff. A few pieces of furniture, and some kitchen stuff, but most of it is items that there are already replacements for either in storage because RCT has the same thing, or it's just not something we really need anyway.

As for buying a house... RCT wants to wait to buy until at least March, because he wants to wait until he's done his taxes for the year as well as some other milestones. Sounds weird, but his work and pay schedule is really weird too. His job is commission based so even though he makes more money than any of us, he still needs to make sure that his tax bill is paid and if any changes in income impact his child support payments, or anything else... that's all settled before he looks at the final figures for how much is leftover from savings and what that means he can contribute toward the down payment. And currently, our intent is to buy the house in my and Sudo's names, but since RCT will also put up down payment money, that will be a "gift" and we'll draw up a lease and he'll live rent-free for some period of time. Of course, if for any reason he moved out before then, we'd owe him a certain amount of money to be paid back within some period of time. We'll make sure that everything is written up in a way that covers the risk to everyone. Though realistically, even if he moves eventually, he's going to want to have some sort of place to rest his head because he'd be back roughly every other weekend to see his daughter, so he would probably continue to want to minimally "rent" from us and be able to keep stuff (both his and his kid's) at our place.

Anyway... point being that while I'm a bit bummed that our timeline is delayed further, on the bright side it means we will have more money saved by then.

Oh, and it sounds like Peach is going to be getting "custody" of the dogs. Sudo will keep them initially until she's settled in with the move, but probably will take them within a few weeks. After that, I would imagine that Sudo will still get the dogs back every once in a while since he absolutely wants to still see them sometimes.... but it sounds like him getting the dogs isn't a battle that he was going to win. Or more like I should say that there no way he was going to get the girl dog which Peach considers "hers" and Sudo refuses to split them up.

Honestly, while I'm sad to see the dogs go and I'm definitely sad that Sudo will really miss them (though I'll miss them too), I also can't help but recognize how less complicated our logistics will be if we don't have to always make sure someone is home by X time after the work day to make sure the dogs are walked. As much as I love dogs, it's exactly why I've never gotten any while living on my own. I've grown up with dogs, but always larger breeds that could also handle being left outside year round, even in the winter (with a dog box with some warm bedding inside). So depending on the house we end up with, if we were to consider getting a dog in the future, that would for sure be a requirement of mine.

So basically, once Peach moves.... for the time that Sudo still has the dogs, I'll probably see him a bit less since he'll have to be home almost every day. I'll end up at his place on weekends and maybe 1 week night, but probably not much more. Once the dogs go with Peach, then Sudo will probably be spending much of the week nights at my place to shorten his work commute, but then we'll trade off and spend weekends at his place so that he's not NEVER home anymore. And that will be our lives for a few months until we can buy a new home and move!
 
The only black Friday shopping that I did was on yandy.com, which is a site that sells tons of lingerie and costume stuff. I bought a TON of lingerie and sexy underwear. In fact, I placed 2 different orders and here I am browsing for more! I already got the first order in the mail last night and tried on a bunch of stuff. 5 of the items didn't fit and 4 of those were non-returnable, but they only cost $10 total for those 4 items (underwear and some thigh highs). BUT today when I went online to try and return a bra, it allowed me to process a return label for the other items at least for store credit, so yay! Hopefully tonight my other order will have arrived and I can try things on so that if there are any returns I can just send it all back in one go.

I have a serious lingerie addiction though. I don't even wear it a ton, I just like sexy clothes! Luckily, I buy MOST of it on the cheap other than the occasional splurge on Victoria's secret, otherwise I'd be killing my bank account. But seriously, to get most of the items for a few bucks due to crazy sales? AWESOME!!

In other news, I took my car to the shop today to get the blower motor fixed so I can finally run the heat in my car. I had already researched the problem so I could tell the shop exactly what was wrong and needed to be replaced. When they looked, they confirmed the problem! AND it cost much less than I was expecting! Woo!

The bummer of today's events other than shelling out more car money is that I had a dentist appointment and my back teeth weren't tracking right with my invisalign so the 3 sets of trays I JUST finished over 6 weeks need to be repeated on the bottom to see if it fixes the problem, and if not, they'll have to take molds and get new trays. The bottom was already ahead of the top due to a similar issue happening there, so right now all this does is catch them back up with each other, but still. BOO. I'm really hoping that I don't have to get a revision ordered. I'm SO CLOSE. If this works, I'm basically 2 months away from getting these damn "buttons" off my teeth and getting the retainer.
 
Ugh, getting ready to go back to the dentist in a few. I went on Tuesday for my regular invisalign appointment every 6 weeks to get another set of new trays and mentioned concern that a bottom tooth wasn't tracking.... turns out that front tooth probably isn't tracking because one of the side molars isn't tracking in a HUGE way. The dentist told me to jump back and re-do that whole sequence of 3 trays on the bottom teeth IF the first of those 3 trays actually fit over the tooth right. But, when I got home, that one was just as messed up, leaving me wondering what the hell happened! Anyway, I'm going in today with all of those trays and they can take a look, but I'll end up having to get a new mold taken and the bottom trays redone. Bummer when I'm only a few trays away from being done! But the top had to have a re-molding, so I guess it's only fitting that now the bottom need to have the same thing done. Bleh.
 
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