Hotwife to poly

[enigmastag]

Totally poly if it works, why not? Just not a requirement.
I would not call it KTP, it's "kitchen table" for a reason - the image is of the polycule sharing meals at least semi-regularly.

:O
I don't know if your wife works or stays at home, but from talking to my friends I think two years age is often a bit of a crisis. Can't blame her for looking for an escape.

You would have to find a good excuse for the overnights for the 10 year old. Small kids are fine with poly, if parents are fine with poly - they don't have a problem accepting that mom or dad love more people.

Did you, or her, ever in your relationship go through a platonic crush? Do you have that experience?

Ok maybe ktp is the wrong choice of words. Thanks for the clarification.

She does stay at home now. We moved cross country last year and this is her first time fully staying at home. We did this for financial reasons partially, but also so she could spend more time w the kids. But it’s been very hard on her. I’ve also had to work nights for the first time in our relationship and when that happened she had a mini breakdown and shortly after. She asked to get back on tinder afterward, and amped up talking to guys cuz she was lonely. I think she used it to fill a void. She’s in the process of starting her own business or getting back in the workforce.

I’m not aware of what a platonic crush is. My wife is very social and has always had people drawn to her. Most of our friends have been couples, but she makes friends easily. But not sure what a platonic crush would be.

 

[Magdlyn]

I'm not sure why Tinwen asked the question, but a platonic crush would be, I think, something like what they call a "bromance." Like, two guys that love each other, but they would say, "no homo," not in an actual romantic or sexual way.

 

[enigmastag]

I'm not sure why Tinwen asked the question, but a platonic crush would be, I think, something like what they call a "bromance." Like, two guys that love each other, but they would say, "no homo," not in an actual romantic or sexual way.

Yeah I’ve had plenty of those my wife would call them that

In the lifestyle the best dynamics are probably those type of vibes as well probably what I was calling ktp. One guy was very respectful and we had a really good rapport but things got a little dicey cuz he refused to sti test and they had hooked up unprotected already and I told my wife I wasn’t comfortable moving forward till he got tested. He never tested and made up some excuses. She was pretty attached and I became the bad guy because I put my foot down over that issue and didn’t wanna risk a sti

 

[Tinwen]

I'm not sure why Tinwen asked the question, but a platonic crush would be, I think, something like what they call a "bromance." Like, two guys that love each other, but they would say, "no homo," not in an actual romantic or sexual way.

I mean falling in love but choosing bot to pursue actual sex or relationship.

It happens even to people in mono relationships all the time (I've had several) - some just can't get a singer, teacher or another idol that would never be interested in them out of their head, some fall for someone they've experienced emotional intimacy with (I've had a couple tell me how they both experienced NRE for the people they played an intense live action role-play weekend with, and had to work through that together).

I'm asking because I think that's great practice in accepting your partner's NRE when you can talk about that, or even better, if you had this happen to you while in a relationship, it's a great experience to understand NRE is not fate and there's an element of active choice in staying with your partner despite new feelings.

 

[enigmastag]

I mean falling in love but choosing bot to pursue actual sex or relationship.

It happens even to people in mono relationships all the time (I've had several) - some just can't get a singer, teacher or another idol that would never be interested in them out of their head, some fall for someone they've experienced emotional intimacy with (I've had a couple tell me how they both experienced NRE for the people they played an intense live action role-play weekend with, and had to work through that together).

I'm asking because I think that's great practice in accepting your partner's NRE when you can talk about that, or even better, if you had this happen to you while in a relationship, it's a great experience to understand NRE is not fate and there's an element of active choice in staying with your partner despite new feelings.

Yeah I don't think we have, at least not her. We have always had couple friends, and as a monogomous couple there has been a certain level of jealousy and insecurity when it comes to other people so bringing other people in was a big step. I actually had asked her for years and theorized that she was potentially demi sexual because she did such a good job convincing me that she wasn't attracted to anyone else at all. There probably was some truth to it, because she does need some connection to it. But she is now able to tell me who she is attracted to now. Before I was almost believing she found nobody else attractive. We never did celebrity crushes or anything like that. It wasn't really a control thing, we both never had interest in that type of thing. Weve always been pretty co dependent on each other.

 

[Tinwen]

Yeah I don't think we have, at least not her. We have always had couple friends, and as a monogomous couple there has been a certain level of jealousy and insecurity when it comes to other people so bringing other people in was a big step. I actually had asked her for years and theorized that she was potentially demi sexual because she did such a good job convincing me that she wasn't attracted to anyone else at all. There probably was some truth to it, because she does need some connection to it. But she is now able to tell me who she is attracted to now. Before I was almost believing she found nobody else attractive. We never did celebrity crushes or anything like that. It wasn't really a control thing, we both never had interest in that type of thing. Weve always been pretty co dependent on each other.

Yeah, I don't get celebrity crushes either, and I'm not attracted to random guys who aren't somehow interested in me. I do have a soft spot for guys who teach or generally speak well though Even when I was very mono with my first highschool bf, I sometimes couldn't take my eyes off one particular guy who thought us math. Of course I never told my bf
When I started to explore any physical contact I quickly cought more love-y feelings for multiple guys.

It's good you can speak now. That is good practice.